Emily: [Dean has honked, as arranged, when picking up Rory] It certainly is not fine. This is not a drive through, she's not fried chicken.
Emily: You traded my lovely gift for a semi-pornographic, leering monkey lamp? How could you?
[to Rory, after an explosive family dinner between the Gilmores and the Haydens]
Emily Gilmore: I know you heard a lot of talk about various disappointments this evening. And I know you've heard a lot of talk about it in the past. But I want to make this very clear. You, young lady, your person and your existence, have never, ever been, not even for a second, included in that list.
Emily Gilmore: You do not just leave a person a note.
Emily Gilmore: [quoting the letter 16-year old pregnant Lorelai left for them] "Dear Mom and Dad, I'm in labor. See you later, Lorelai."
Emily Gilmore: You do not leave your house when you're having a baby without telling your mother. You say, "Excuse me, Mom, I'm having a baby, give a ride to the damn hospital".
Emily: Is that "uh-hu, yes I'm coming" or "uh-hu, I was reading while you were talking"?
Emily Gilmore: Stop being so dramatic. I just came in for lunch. It's not like I did anything truly terrifying like telling you that buttcrack-bearing jeans have gone out of style.
Emily Gilmore: Lorelai, when a woman has a crack baby, you do not buy her a puppy!
Emily: [to Luke] My daughter and I aren't speaking. She won't take my calls. She won't come to dinner. She apparently wants nothing to do with me. I'm sure you know that Lorelai and I have had many battles, most of them have been because I feel I know what's best for her. But Lorelai has her own ideas about she thinks will make her happy. She wants you Luke. She's made her decision, God help her, but there it is. It doesn't matter if I agree with it, I can't fight it, you've won. Go back to her, I promise I will stay out of it.
Emily Gilmore: [to Rory, who is asleep in bed in the pool house at 8:30] Good morning! You're still sleeping? My goodness, you're young, these are the good days. There's plenty of time to sleep when you've gone up a couple of dress sizes.
Emily: Now let's talk about your money. You were a two-bit gold-digger fresh off the bus from Hicksville when you met Mitchum at whatever bar you happened to stumble into. And what made Mitchum decide to chose you to marry amongst the pack of women he was bedding at the time I'll never know. But hats off to you for bagging him. He's still a playboy you know. Well of course you know! That would explain why your weight goes up and down thirty pounds every other month. But that's your cross to bear. But these are ugly realities, no one needs to talk about them. Those kids are staying together for as long as they like. You won't stop them... Now enjoy the event!
Emily Gilmore: [Lorelai and Rory have a high-spirited discussion at Friday night dinner] Spaghetti and meatballs is just too much excitement.
Emily: He's just become a pain in the you-know-what.
Emily: Would it really please you to hear me say ass?
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Gilmore Girls: Lorelai Gilmore
Lorelai: That's all were all looking for, a nice person to hang out with until we drop dead.
Lorelai: A crazy evil spirit obsessed with bra-size took over my body.
Lorelai: Alright, wait up! So what does the deer look like? Huh? Does it have any distinguishing marks - besides the word 'Jeep' imprinted on it's forehead?
Lorelai: I'll still love you...
even if you can't support me in my old age in the fabulous manner to which I plan on growing accustomed.
Lorelai: [about some homemade lemonade] Mmm... tasty and flame retardant.
Lorelai: I'm going to be so cool in there, you will mistake me for Shaft.
[Doorbell rings]
Lorelai: Who the hell rings a doorbell at a party? Bring your ass in here.
[Richard and Emily come in]
Lorelai: Or, asses
Lorelai: [to Lane who is upset because she has randomly touched a guy's hair] Hey, do you wanna talk? I'm not Rory, but we do use the same blow dryer.
Lorelai: I have to know where you are at all times, especially when you have my shoes on.
Lorelai Gilmore: So God is a women.
Lorelai Gilmore: We can't be lost; we don't know where we're going.
Lorelai Gilmore: We're almost there, but nowhere near it. All that matters is that we're going.
Lorelai Gilmore: [to Emily and Richard] Are you two completely out of your minds? There's a ceremony going on in there! Young girls in ugly dresses and stupid fans are parading around in circles for god knows what reason, and you two are ruining it!
[talking about Jess at town meeting]
Lorelai: I heard he controls the weather and wrote the screen play to "Glitter".
Lorelai Gilmore: Hey, I have a new year's resolution for you: Become more cynical and self-absorbed.
Lorelai Gilmore: I remember the days of lying to my mother about a boy. Once I had a boy hidden in the closet, and of course Mom wouldn't leave, so I finally had to pretend to get sick to my stomach just to get her out of the room long enough for him to climb down the window and down the tree. He fell. Broke his leg. Ah, to be young again.
Lorelei: It’s expensive to slowly rot your insides.
Lorelai: if you had your way mother you'd lock us up like veal, that's what you want is veal children
Lorelai: [Emily is reminding Lorelai of her DAR meeting on Tuesday ] It's burned into my brain, it's there forever.
Lorelai: When I’m senile and gaga and drooling into a cup... and I can't remember my name, I will still remember that your DAR meeting was on that Tuesday. I'm going to have to be deprogrammed by cult deprogrammers to get that Tuesday out of my brain.
Lorelai: Well, then I shall convert them, I am the Jehovah's coffee girl.
Lorelai Gilmore: And no one else can do it so you came slumming after me and I'm your last choice?
Lorelai Gilmore: [on telephone] Hi, yes. I was at your auction yesterday, I was wondering if you could help me? I met a man there, and I would like to contact him, but I didn't get his name and I wondered if you could look it up for me. He was paddle number 17, and - Oh, right. - Confidential. Got it. Well you know actually I misspoke earlier because this isn't a complete stranger I'm trying to contact here, he's an old friend from school - Good question. Well I don't know his name because I only knew him by his nickname, uh, Shamu, we called him Shamu, kind of a big guy in high school; he's slimmed down quite a bit. No, see, I don't have time to contact the high school alumni committee because time is of the essence! See, Shamu and I went into a liquor store after the auction and we bought a lottery ticket together, and we tore it, and I took half and he took half, and I'll be damned if the thing didn't win! Fourteen million dollars! Really. But see, we have to claim it by 4 p.m. today or we forfeit - Ah, yes. Oh. Well. But there's one more thing that I forgot to tell you, see, um, my blood type is O negative and he's O negative and I have a medical condition that - All right then. Well thank you, anyway. Bye.
Lorelei: We are “Anne Heche speaking her own special language” crazy.
Lorelai: I look adorable! No one ever told me that if you fish, you get to buy an outfit. I'll do just about anything if I can buy an outfit!
Lorelai Gilmore: Yeah, you got a girl's future in that sack of yours. Santa...
Lorelai Gilmore: It's the alarm clock. I had a dream once that you set eighteen alarm clocks to get me up. Which is not a bad way to get me up.
Lorelai: Are you sure she's gonna want that back? It's been left alone all night at a keg party, there's no getting it over that. That backpack is permanently scarred, that backpack is Zelda Fitzgerald.
Lorelai: [after seeing a brochure to Lane's college] Every kid in that brochure was awkward and panicked, it looked like the academy award audience during Michael Moore's speech.
Lorelai: Okay, um, little tip: the whole stalking thing works infinitely better when you don't actually smash your face in the window.
Lorelai: Happy Birthday, Doogie.
Lorelai: You've been stomping around, barking at people for days.
Lorelai: Ok, just one more warning, when they showed the first motion picture over 100 years ago, it featured a train rushing toward the camera, people were so sure the train would burst off the screen, that they ran away in terror, now luke, the train is not going to leave the screen...
Lorelai Gilmore: She was the most beautiful pink all over. She even smelled pink. That sounds weird. I can't describe it - that little, pink, baby smell. The first time her eyes focused on me and her little fingers reached out... I was someone new. She had me.
Lorelai Gilmore: I wouldn't dismiss it so fast Mom, the internet is more than just good porn now.
Lorelai: Welcome to tonight's episode of "Things I Never Needed to Know About My Father."
Lorelai: Twenty-three is old. It's almost twenty-five, which is, like, almost mid-twenties.
Lorelai: I think I forgot to put on underwear... can you check?... Did I just ask you to check if I put on underwear?
Lorelai Gilmore: Well dad, you know what monkeys do when they don't like people staring at them at the zoo...
Lorelai Gilmore: How beautiful are we talking? Catherine Zeta-Jones or the weird looking Hilton sister?
Lorelai: Well, he was breathing and standing. I think all signs point to alive!
Lorelai: I think so. But then we'll have to hide his jacket. So I suggest I put it under my dress and pretend to be pregnant, then Jason can pretend to be the doctor. Then Rory can dig a tunnel, and ...
Lorelai: Cold, cold, cold, cold, icy feet. Stupid, frozen tundra house. Honey, why are you sleeping in here? Your room is way warmer. Ok, here is the question for today kids: what the hell are the Eskimos thinking? I mean yes, the hoods are cute but it's always cold, always! Plus you have to eat fish for breakfast, and you have to eat whales, and polar bears, and penguins and Santa Clause. Coffee's on and Pop-Tarts are poptarting! If you're just gonna lie there I'm just gonna have to sit here. I'm gonna have to make myself very comfortable on my nice warm Rory!
Lorelai: Hey, did anyone ever think Sylvia Plath wasn't crazy, maybe she was just cold?
Lorelai: You know there are very few times in my life when I find my self sitting around, thinking I wish I was married, but today... I... I'm happy, you know? I like my life, I like my friends, I like my... stuff. My time, my space, my TV.
Lorelai: But every now and then, just for a moment I wish I had a partner, someone to pick up the slack, someone to wait for the cable guy, make ME coffee in the morning. Meet the stupid sink before it gets shipped back to Canada!
Lorelai: I just thought I had everything under control, but I didn't and the inn is just falling apart. This has been my dream forever and I have it and it's here and I'm failing and I can't handle it, I just spend every minute running around and working and thinking and I thought I would have help but Sookie has Davey and Michel has Celine and I'm... I can't do it all by myself! And I don't even have time to see my kid anymore, hell forget see her, just even talk to her and I miss her. And I sat there in my parents' house just listening to my grandma basically call me a charity case and I couldn't even argue with her, I couldn't even say anything, because I am, I'm running out of money! And I was going to ask you for $30,000 at dinner tonight, that's how pathetic I am.
Lorelai: Well, I've got my cloaking device activated so...
Lorelai Gilmore: Oh, I left a tip this time and I didn't put it under the water glass cuz I know you hate that and I made sure it didn't touch the syrup cuz that makes it sticky, and I didn't leave the last dollar in pennies just to get rid of them.
Lorelai: [Lorelai speaking of her to-do list for the inn] Hey, do you know that if the entire population of China walked by, the line would never end because of the rate of population increase? That's my list, every Chinese person in the world.
Lorelai: The cats. They know that I've broken up with Jason and that I'm alone, and they've decided that it's time for me to become a crazy cat lady.
Lorelai: Oh I cant stop drinking the coffee, I stop drinking the coffee, I stop doing the standing and walking and the words putting into sentence doing.
Lorelai Gilmore: Oh, now Liz, it's inappropriate for you to propose to me on your wedding day.
Lorelai: But maybe he didn't mean it as a date thing. Maybe he just needed to get out of the house. And since I'm currently one of the women sitting home, thinking "if I could only find a man like Aragorn," he picked me.
Lorelai: No, Rory, you didn't. You're 19, you're in college, you can handle your own affairs. Sorry, that's a bad choice of words you can handle your own life events.
Lorelai: If one of us had been a frog, it would have had some seriously impressive consequences.
Lorelai: So make sure they like the lemon candles and that the rooms smell pretty when they get up there. And you did a great job this weekend. Great job.
Lorelai: Ugh... I hate early. Early must die.
Lorelai: Alright, but no taking me to an art museum after hours, or to an empty Hollywood bowling alley, or give me a pair of diamond earrings that you bought with your college money when all the time you're really in love with your best friend the drummer who's posing as our driver for the evening.
Lorelai: Well, people don't read the back of the menu to find out what really happened. They read the back of the menu to be happy. To be uplifted. That's why they read the back of the menu!
Lorelai: Acting like a dim-witted salesgirl while showing off her mother's new personal panic room "I know how to protect you from Agent Orange and Shrapnel. Ask me how!"
Lorelai: I'm going right past the very few complaints comment because I know you're just trying to bait me what complaints?
Lorelai: Oh, forget the foot. I need caffeine. Whatever form you've got, I haven't had any all day. I'll drink it, shoot it, eat it, snort it, whatever form it's in, gimme.
Lorelai: Yeah, well, follow through, always been my problem.
Lorelai: Repaying your debt to society, I assume.
Lorelai: Be sure to send me a change of address card! Grandma can print them out for you with a little fleur-de-lis.
Lorelai: I tried so hard. I have a list of things that he's afraid of on the fridge. And I try to do the right thing. I should not have socialized him at Kirk's doggy day care the other day. I should have taken him to the best doggy day care in the country, even if it was in Seattle. That's where I should have taken him.
Did you leave a message? My answering machine dropped dead of exhaustion.
Lorelai Gilmore: He's totally fine having his personal freedom slowly stripped away, as long as he's completely unaware that it's happening. Just like a true American.
Lorelai Gilmore: Wow. Ice, ice, baby.
Lorelai: You're going to have to tell me how it is living with a guy before I let Luke move in. If it's too creepy he may have to stay with Babette.
Lorelai: And I've heard horror stories about toilet seats you wouldn't believe.
Lorelai: And just remember, if things don't go well, we will stop loving you.
Lorelai: I managed to find Uno and checkers, and also parts of Battleship and most of the pieces of Candyland. Which I figure, we can mix together to create a fabulous new game, Candyship Battleland. War never tasted so good!
Lorelai Gilmore: Lorelai Gilmore: disappointing mothers since 1968.
Lorelai Gilmore: Because an unmarried woman, alone, of a certain age, dressed the way I dress, apparently is Korean for Jenna Jameson.
Lorelai: Even when I have a man, I'm still the girl who doesn't have a man!
Lorelai Gilmore: Little tiny boxes can be scary... unless, of course, they contain big diamond earrings.
Lorelai Gilmore: [to a psychologist] Voices in your head? Totally normal, right... there's only two. That speak English.
Lorelai Gilmore: So you can't be shocked when you serve people three cups of coffee that they don't feel like going out for coffee. Not everyone's me.
Lorelai: [Explaining to Sookie why she had broken up with Luke for good] It was him not fighting for me. I gave him the ultimatum and he let me walk away. I didn't want a life separate from Luke, and that's all he could give me. It's like Luke is driving a car and I just want to be in the passenger seat. He's locked the door and I have to hold onto the bumper. I am not even asking him to open the door for me, just leave it unlocked and say come in, but he didn't do that. So I am hanging on to the bumper and life goes on and the car goes on, and I get really badly bruised and I'm hitting potholes. And it hurts. It really hurts. So yesterday I had to let go of the bumper. Because it hurts too much.
Lorelai: [Rory shows Lorelai her massive stack of materials for her cancelled Asia trip] Wow! Were you planning on visiting Asia, or invading it?
Lorelai Gilmore: You don't have to jump off the Empire State Building to know it's gonna hurt.
Lorelai: Well, Stars Hollow smells like pickles...
Lorelai: What about instead of La Boheme, we took our inspiration from Rent: East Village, 1985, rickety tables, chipped glassware...
Lorelai: I need you to know that you're the man that I want to want.
Lorelai Gilmore: I'll get you a thermos, that says "World's Greatest Reporter," to match your cap.
Lorelai: That's the last time I buy something just because its furry.
Lorelei: I’m crushed I’m bleeding, get me a tourniquet. They’re none left because Rory wouldn’t wash them with her laundry.
Lorelai: [entering Luke's] Okay! I have five minutes to drink as much coffee as I can before I have to drive to Hartford to spend the evening with my mother alone, and who am I saying this to?
Lorelai: No, sure it is. It's nice to be able to go from the beach to the mosque without having to change.
Lorelai Gilmore: Dry sugar on a dry toe isn't gonna work!
Lorelai: A crazy evil spirit obsessed with bra-size took over my body.
Lorelai: Alright, wait up! So what does the deer look like? Huh? Does it have any distinguishing marks - besides the word 'Jeep' imprinted on it's forehead?
Lorelai: I'll still love you...
even if you can't support me in my old age in the fabulous manner to which I plan on growing accustomed.
Lorelai: [about some homemade lemonade] Mmm... tasty and flame retardant.
Lorelai: I'm going to be so cool in there, you will mistake me for Shaft.
[Doorbell rings]
Lorelai: Who the hell rings a doorbell at a party? Bring your ass in here.
[Richard and Emily come in]
Lorelai: Or, asses
Lorelai: [to Lane who is upset because she has randomly touched a guy's hair] Hey, do you wanna talk? I'm not Rory, but we do use the same blow dryer.
Lorelai: I have to know where you are at all times, especially when you have my shoes on.
Lorelai Gilmore: So God is a women.
Lorelai Gilmore: We can't be lost; we don't know where we're going.
Lorelai Gilmore: We're almost there, but nowhere near it. All that matters is that we're going.
Lorelai Gilmore: [to Emily and Richard] Are you two completely out of your minds? There's a ceremony going on in there! Young girls in ugly dresses and stupid fans are parading around in circles for god knows what reason, and you two are ruining it!
[talking about Jess at town meeting]
Lorelai: I heard he controls the weather and wrote the screen play to "Glitter".
Lorelai Gilmore: Hey, I have a new year's resolution for you: Become more cynical and self-absorbed.
Lorelai Gilmore: I remember the days of lying to my mother about a boy. Once I had a boy hidden in the closet, and of course Mom wouldn't leave, so I finally had to pretend to get sick to my stomach just to get her out of the room long enough for him to climb down the window and down the tree. He fell. Broke his leg. Ah, to be young again.
Lorelei: It’s expensive to slowly rot your insides.
Lorelai: if you had your way mother you'd lock us up like veal, that's what you want is veal children
Lorelai: [Emily is reminding Lorelai of her DAR meeting on Tuesday ] It's burned into my brain, it's there forever.
Lorelai: When I’m senile and gaga and drooling into a cup... and I can't remember my name, I will still remember that your DAR meeting was on that Tuesday. I'm going to have to be deprogrammed by cult deprogrammers to get that Tuesday out of my brain.
Lorelai: Well, then I shall convert them, I am the Jehovah's coffee girl.
Lorelai Gilmore: And no one else can do it so you came slumming after me and I'm your last choice?
Lorelai Gilmore: [on telephone] Hi, yes. I was at your auction yesterday, I was wondering if you could help me? I met a man there, and I would like to contact him, but I didn't get his name and I wondered if you could look it up for me. He was paddle number 17, and - Oh, right. - Confidential. Got it. Well you know actually I misspoke earlier because this isn't a complete stranger I'm trying to contact here, he's an old friend from school - Good question. Well I don't know his name because I only knew him by his nickname, uh, Shamu, we called him Shamu, kind of a big guy in high school; he's slimmed down quite a bit. No, see, I don't have time to contact the high school alumni committee because time is of the essence! See, Shamu and I went into a liquor store after the auction and we bought a lottery ticket together, and we tore it, and I took half and he took half, and I'll be damned if the thing didn't win! Fourteen million dollars! Really. But see, we have to claim it by 4 p.m. today or we forfeit - Ah, yes. Oh. Well. But there's one more thing that I forgot to tell you, see, um, my blood type is O negative and he's O negative and I have a medical condition that - All right then. Well thank you, anyway. Bye.
Lorelei: We are “Anne Heche speaking her own special language” crazy.
Lorelai: I look adorable! No one ever told me that if you fish, you get to buy an outfit. I'll do just about anything if I can buy an outfit!
Lorelai Gilmore: Yeah, you got a girl's future in that sack of yours. Santa...
Lorelai Gilmore: It's the alarm clock. I had a dream once that you set eighteen alarm clocks to get me up. Which is not a bad way to get me up.
Lorelai: Are you sure she's gonna want that back? It's been left alone all night at a keg party, there's no getting it over that. That backpack is permanently scarred, that backpack is Zelda Fitzgerald.
Lorelai: [after seeing a brochure to Lane's college] Every kid in that brochure was awkward and panicked, it looked like the academy award audience during Michael Moore's speech.
Lorelai: Okay, um, little tip: the whole stalking thing works infinitely better when you don't actually smash your face in the window.
Lorelai: Happy Birthday, Doogie.
Lorelai: You've been stomping around, barking at people for days.
Lorelai: Ok, just one more warning, when they showed the first motion picture over 100 years ago, it featured a train rushing toward the camera, people were so sure the train would burst off the screen, that they ran away in terror, now luke, the train is not going to leave the screen...
Lorelai Gilmore: She was the most beautiful pink all over. She even smelled pink. That sounds weird. I can't describe it - that little, pink, baby smell. The first time her eyes focused on me and her little fingers reached out... I was someone new. She had me.
Lorelai Gilmore: I wouldn't dismiss it so fast Mom, the internet is more than just good porn now.
Lorelai: Welcome to tonight's episode of "Things I Never Needed to Know About My Father."
Lorelai: Twenty-three is old. It's almost twenty-five, which is, like, almost mid-twenties.
Lorelai: I think I forgot to put on underwear... can you check?... Did I just ask you to check if I put on underwear?
Lorelai Gilmore: Well dad, you know what monkeys do when they don't like people staring at them at the zoo...
Lorelai Gilmore: How beautiful are we talking? Catherine Zeta-Jones or the weird looking Hilton sister?
Lorelai: Well, he was breathing and standing. I think all signs point to alive!
Lorelai: I think so. But then we'll have to hide his jacket. So I suggest I put it under my dress and pretend to be pregnant, then Jason can pretend to be the doctor. Then Rory can dig a tunnel, and ...
Lorelai: Cold, cold, cold, cold, icy feet. Stupid, frozen tundra house. Honey, why are you sleeping in here? Your room is way warmer. Ok, here is the question for today kids: what the hell are the Eskimos thinking? I mean yes, the hoods are cute but it's always cold, always! Plus you have to eat fish for breakfast, and you have to eat whales, and polar bears, and penguins and Santa Clause. Coffee's on and Pop-Tarts are poptarting! If you're just gonna lie there I'm just gonna have to sit here. I'm gonna have to make myself very comfortable on my nice warm Rory!
Lorelai: Hey, did anyone ever think Sylvia Plath wasn't crazy, maybe she was just cold?
Lorelai: You know there are very few times in my life when I find my self sitting around, thinking I wish I was married, but today... I... I'm happy, you know? I like my life, I like my friends, I like my... stuff. My time, my space, my TV.
Lorelai: But every now and then, just for a moment I wish I had a partner, someone to pick up the slack, someone to wait for the cable guy, make ME coffee in the morning. Meet the stupid sink before it gets shipped back to Canada!
Lorelai: I just thought I had everything under control, but I didn't and the inn is just falling apart. This has been my dream forever and I have it and it's here and I'm failing and I can't handle it, I just spend every minute running around and working and thinking and I thought I would have help but Sookie has Davey and Michel has Celine and I'm... I can't do it all by myself! And I don't even have time to see my kid anymore, hell forget see her, just even talk to her and I miss her. And I sat there in my parents' house just listening to my grandma basically call me a charity case and I couldn't even argue with her, I couldn't even say anything, because I am, I'm running out of money! And I was going to ask you for $30,000 at dinner tonight, that's how pathetic I am.
Lorelai: Well, I've got my cloaking device activated so...
Lorelai Gilmore: Oh, I left a tip this time and I didn't put it under the water glass cuz I know you hate that and I made sure it didn't touch the syrup cuz that makes it sticky, and I didn't leave the last dollar in pennies just to get rid of them.
Lorelai: [Lorelai speaking of her to-do list for the inn] Hey, do you know that if the entire population of China walked by, the line would never end because of the rate of population increase? That's my list, every Chinese person in the world.
Lorelai: The cats. They know that I've broken up with Jason and that I'm alone, and they've decided that it's time for me to become a crazy cat lady.
Lorelai: Oh I cant stop drinking the coffee, I stop drinking the coffee, I stop doing the standing and walking and the words putting into sentence doing.
Lorelai Gilmore: Oh, now Liz, it's inappropriate for you to propose to me on your wedding day.
Lorelai: But maybe he didn't mean it as a date thing. Maybe he just needed to get out of the house. And since I'm currently one of the women sitting home, thinking "if I could only find a man like Aragorn," he picked me.
Lorelai: No, Rory, you didn't. You're 19, you're in college, you can handle your own affairs. Sorry, that's a bad choice of words you can handle your own life events.
Lorelai: If one of us had been a frog, it would have had some seriously impressive consequences.
Lorelai: So make sure they like the lemon candles and that the rooms smell pretty when they get up there. And you did a great job this weekend. Great job.
Lorelai: Ugh... I hate early. Early must die.
Lorelai: Alright, but no taking me to an art museum after hours, or to an empty Hollywood bowling alley, or give me a pair of diamond earrings that you bought with your college money when all the time you're really in love with your best friend the drummer who's posing as our driver for the evening.
Lorelai: Well, people don't read the back of the menu to find out what really happened. They read the back of the menu to be happy. To be uplifted. That's why they read the back of the menu!
Lorelai: Acting like a dim-witted salesgirl while showing off her mother's new personal panic room "I know how to protect you from Agent Orange and Shrapnel. Ask me how!"
Lorelai: I'm going right past the very few complaints comment because I know you're just trying to bait me what complaints?
Lorelai: Oh, forget the foot. I need caffeine. Whatever form you've got, I haven't had any all day. I'll drink it, shoot it, eat it, snort it, whatever form it's in, gimme.
Lorelai: Yeah, well, follow through, always been my problem.
Lorelai: Repaying your debt to society, I assume.
Lorelai: Be sure to send me a change of address card! Grandma can print them out for you with a little fleur-de-lis.
Lorelai: I tried so hard. I have a list of things that he's afraid of on the fridge. And I try to do the right thing. I should not have socialized him at Kirk's doggy day care the other day. I should have taken him to the best doggy day care in the country, even if it was in Seattle. That's where I should have taken him.
Did you leave a message? My answering machine dropped dead of exhaustion.
Lorelai Gilmore: He's totally fine having his personal freedom slowly stripped away, as long as he's completely unaware that it's happening. Just like a true American.
Lorelai Gilmore: Wow. Ice, ice, baby.
Lorelai: You're going to have to tell me how it is living with a guy before I let Luke move in. If it's too creepy he may have to stay with Babette.
Lorelai: And I've heard horror stories about toilet seats you wouldn't believe.
Lorelai: And just remember, if things don't go well, we will stop loving you.
Lorelai: I managed to find Uno and checkers, and also parts of Battleship and most of the pieces of Candyland. Which I figure, we can mix together to create a fabulous new game, Candyship Battleland. War never tasted so good!
Lorelai Gilmore: Lorelai Gilmore: disappointing mothers since 1968.
Lorelai Gilmore: Because an unmarried woman, alone, of a certain age, dressed the way I dress, apparently is Korean for Jenna Jameson.
Lorelai: Even when I have a man, I'm still the girl who doesn't have a man!
Lorelai Gilmore: Little tiny boxes can be scary... unless, of course, they contain big diamond earrings.
Lorelai Gilmore: [to a psychologist] Voices in your head? Totally normal, right... there's only two. That speak English.
Lorelai Gilmore: So you can't be shocked when you serve people three cups of coffee that they don't feel like going out for coffee. Not everyone's me.
Lorelai: [Explaining to Sookie why she had broken up with Luke for good] It was him not fighting for me. I gave him the ultimatum and he let me walk away. I didn't want a life separate from Luke, and that's all he could give me. It's like Luke is driving a car and I just want to be in the passenger seat. He's locked the door and I have to hold onto the bumper. I am not even asking him to open the door for me, just leave it unlocked and say come in, but he didn't do that. So I am hanging on to the bumper and life goes on and the car goes on, and I get really badly bruised and I'm hitting potholes. And it hurts. It really hurts. So yesterday I had to let go of the bumper. Because it hurts too much.
Lorelai: [Rory shows Lorelai her massive stack of materials for her cancelled Asia trip] Wow! Were you planning on visiting Asia, or invading it?
Lorelai Gilmore: You don't have to jump off the Empire State Building to know it's gonna hurt.
Lorelai: Well, Stars Hollow smells like pickles...
Lorelai: What about instead of La Boheme, we took our inspiration from Rent: East Village, 1985, rickety tables, chipped glassware...
Lorelai: I need you to know that you're the man that I want to want.
Lorelai Gilmore: I'll get you a thermos, that says "World's Greatest Reporter," to match your cap.
Lorelai: That's the last time I buy something just because its furry.
Lorelei: I’m crushed I’m bleeding, get me a tourniquet. They’re none left because Rory wouldn’t wash them with her laundry.
Lorelai: [entering Luke's] Okay! I have five minutes to drink as much coffee as I can before I have to drive to Hartford to spend the evening with my mother alone, and who am I saying this to?
Lorelai: No, sure it is. It's nice to be able to go from the beach to the mosque without having to change.
Lorelai Gilmore: Dry sugar on a dry toe isn't gonna work!
Gilmore Girls: Rory Gilmore
I have now used the word "suck" so much, it's lost all meaning to me.
[after running away from Doose's market after being kissed, to Lane]
I got kissed. [holds up a box of starch] And I shoplifted.
Hey my mom’s not wearing any underwear.
Because sometimes you have something you need to say, but you can't because the words won't come out, or you get scared, or you feel stupid. But if you could write a song and sing it, then you could say what needed to say, and it would be beautiful, and people would listen, and you wouldn't make a complete idiot out of yourself. But all of us can't be song writers, so some of us will never get the chance to say what we're thinking, or what we want other people to know that we're thinking, so we'll never get the chance to make things right again ever... So give this guy a license!
Because I love you, you idiot.
This isn’t Amish country. Boys and girls are supposed to date alone.
We're competing against the Michael Angelo of snow.
And then every year we put the flowers on the counter and forget the ugliness ever happened.
They had to work, I'm here all by myself, and I'm trying to be calm but I'm starting to feel nauseous and... and the hospital has a smell, and there are noises, and those gowns do not stay closed, and I've seen a lot of butts today, and and...
I need you, I need you here, I need you now, I cannot do this alone, I need my mommy and damn it, I don't care who knows it!
Alright, let's make it a foursome.
[to Luke's and Jess's answering machine] It's me. I just wanted to let you know that this is the last weekend I spend sitting around like an idiot hoping you'll call. Okay? I'm not going to be that girl. From now on, I want a plan. I mean a real plan with a time and a place. And I'm tired of hearing "Let's hook up later." What does that mean, anyway? What's later? How do I set my watch to later? Later doesn't cut it any more, got it? And, yeah, you know, maybe I am spoiled; but guess what, I like being spoiled! I plan to go on being spoiled. And if that doesn't sound like something that you can or want to do, then, fine! I'm sure you'll find another girl who doesn't mind sitting around cleaning her keyboard on a Friday night hoping you'll call. But it's not going to be me!
[almost hangs up]
Oh, yeah. This is a message for Jess.
I know. But it's my mom's favorite part. Once we tried to make a cake entirely out of frosting, which turned out to be better in theory than in actual execution.
Rory: [to Jess, on the phone] Jess, is that you? Jess, I'm pretty sure it's you and I'm pretty sure you've been calling and not saying anything but wanna say something. Hello? You're not going to talk? Fine, I'll talk. You didn't handle things right at all. You could've talked to me. You could've told me that you were having trouble in school and weren't going to graduate, and that your dad had been there, but you didn't. And you ended up not taking me to my prom and not coming to my graduation and leaving again without saying goodbye again, and that's fine, I get it, but that's it for me. I'm going to Europe tomorrow and I'm going to Yale and I'm moving on. And I'm not going to pine. I hope you didn't think I was going to pine, okay? I think... I think I may have loved you, but I just need to let it go. So, that's it, I guess. Um, I hope you're good. I want you to be good, and, um, okay, so, goodbye. That word sounds really lame and stupid right now, but there it is. Goodbye.
Rory: Headmaster Charleston, faculty members, fellow students, family and friends, welcome. We never thought this day would come. We prayed for its quick delivery, crossed days off our calendars, counted hours, minutes and seconds and now that it's here, I'm sorry it is, because it means leaving friends who inspire me and teachers who've been my mentors, so many people who've shaped my life, and my fellow students lives impermeably and forever. I live in two worlds. One is a world of books. I've been a resident of Faulkner's Yoknapatawpha County, hunted the white whale aboard the Pequod, fought alongside Napoleon, sailed a raft with Huck and Jim, committed absurdities with Ignatius J. Reilly, rode a sad train with Anna Karenina and strolled down Swann's Way. It's a rewarding world, but my second one is by far superior. My second one is populated with characters slightly less eccentric, but supremely real, made of flesh and bone, full of love, who are my ultimate inspiration for everything. Richard and Emily Gilmore are kind, decent, unfailingly generous people. They are my twin pillars, without whom I could not stand. I am proud to be their grandchild. But my ultimate inspiration comes from my best friend, the dazzling woman from whom I received my name and my life's blood, Lorelai Gilmore.
Rory Gilmore: Hey, talk more like a ferret!
Rory: You know, I have actually thought about this moment. A lot. What would Jess say to me if I ever saw him again? I mean, he just took off, no note, no call, nothing, how could he explain that? And then a year goes by. No word, nothing, so he couldn't possibly have a good excuse for that, right? I have imagined hundreds of different scenarios with a hundred different great last parting lines, and I have to tell you that I am actually very curious to see which way this is going to go.
Rory Gilmore: 5 years? Cool... I've got about the next 2 and a half hours planned... then there's just darkness... and possibly some dragons.
Rory: [Rory and Paris are in Florida for spring break; both are drunk] Whoa, I'm loving the spinning beach.
Rory: It was interesting, you know. We sat on the beach, went to a club, watched the Power of Myths, Paris and I kissed...
Rory: I am late for class and you put a printing press on my backpack!
Rory: Okay, this is the textbook definition of a perfect moment.
Rory: My mom and I have been planning for my 21st birthday since... well, my first memory is kindergarten, but I have a feeling she was talking about it before that. We had this whole big thing planned.
Rory: I mean, how fair is that? He's gone, and then he shows up out of the blue, 'You can’t live here, this place is a dump, and by the way, I love you!' I love you? Is he serious?
Rory: Yeah, I'm a treat! I don't know what I'm gonna do, I don't think I can take running into him every day in the halls, and in the paper and the coffee cart... Oh my god! I'm gonna have to quit drinking coffee! And I love coffee!
Rory: My books looks sad. Can books look sad?
Rory Gilmore: Because, Logan had many many blondes for Thanksgiving.
Rory Gilmore: He cheated on me... with an entire wedding party.
Rory: [screams out, as an excuse to not answer the phone] I'm a cat with no legs!
Rory Gilmore: A trench coat would be too 'All the President's Men' but my blue coat would be too 'His Girl Friday.' I don't know!
[after running away from Doose's market after being kissed, to Lane]
I got kissed. [holds up a box of starch] And I shoplifted.
Hey my mom’s not wearing any underwear.
Because sometimes you have something you need to say, but you can't because the words won't come out, or you get scared, or you feel stupid. But if you could write a song and sing it, then you could say what needed to say, and it would be beautiful, and people would listen, and you wouldn't make a complete idiot out of yourself. But all of us can't be song writers, so some of us will never get the chance to say what we're thinking, or what we want other people to know that we're thinking, so we'll never get the chance to make things right again ever... So give this guy a license!
Because I love you, you idiot.
This isn’t Amish country. Boys and girls are supposed to date alone.
We're competing against the Michael Angelo of snow.
And then every year we put the flowers on the counter and forget the ugliness ever happened.
They had to work, I'm here all by myself, and I'm trying to be calm but I'm starting to feel nauseous and... and the hospital has a smell, and there are noises, and those gowns do not stay closed, and I've seen a lot of butts today, and and...
I need you, I need you here, I need you now, I cannot do this alone, I need my mommy and damn it, I don't care who knows it!
Alright, let's make it a foursome.
[to Luke's and Jess's answering machine] It's me. I just wanted to let you know that this is the last weekend I spend sitting around like an idiot hoping you'll call. Okay? I'm not going to be that girl. From now on, I want a plan. I mean a real plan with a time and a place. And I'm tired of hearing "Let's hook up later." What does that mean, anyway? What's later? How do I set my watch to later? Later doesn't cut it any more, got it? And, yeah, you know, maybe I am spoiled; but guess what, I like being spoiled! I plan to go on being spoiled. And if that doesn't sound like something that you can or want to do, then, fine! I'm sure you'll find another girl who doesn't mind sitting around cleaning her keyboard on a Friday night hoping you'll call. But it's not going to be me!
[almost hangs up]
Oh, yeah. This is a message for Jess.
I know. But it's my mom's favorite part. Once we tried to make a cake entirely out of frosting, which turned out to be better in theory than in actual execution.
Rory: [to Jess, on the phone] Jess, is that you? Jess, I'm pretty sure it's you and I'm pretty sure you've been calling and not saying anything but wanna say something. Hello? You're not going to talk? Fine, I'll talk. You didn't handle things right at all. You could've talked to me. You could've told me that you were having trouble in school and weren't going to graduate, and that your dad had been there, but you didn't. And you ended up not taking me to my prom and not coming to my graduation and leaving again without saying goodbye again, and that's fine, I get it, but that's it for me. I'm going to Europe tomorrow and I'm going to Yale and I'm moving on. And I'm not going to pine. I hope you didn't think I was going to pine, okay? I think... I think I may have loved you, but I just need to let it go. So, that's it, I guess. Um, I hope you're good. I want you to be good, and, um, okay, so, goodbye. That word sounds really lame and stupid right now, but there it is. Goodbye.
Rory: Headmaster Charleston, faculty members, fellow students, family and friends, welcome. We never thought this day would come. We prayed for its quick delivery, crossed days off our calendars, counted hours, minutes and seconds and now that it's here, I'm sorry it is, because it means leaving friends who inspire me and teachers who've been my mentors, so many people who've shaped my life, and my fellow students lives impermeably and forever. I live in two worlds. One is a world of books. I've been a resident of Faulkner's Yoknapatawpha County, hunted the white whale aboard the Pequod, fought alongside Napoleon, sailed a raft with Huck and Jim, committed absurdities with Ignatius J. Reilly, rode a sad train with Anna Karenina and strolled down Swann's Way. It's a rewarding world, but my second one is by far superior. My second one is populated with characters slightly less eccentric, but supremely real, made of flesh and bone, full of love, who are my ultimate inspiration for everything. Richard and Emily Gilmore are kind, decent, unfailingly generous people. They are my twin pillars, without whom I could not stand. I am proud to be their grandchild. But my ultimate inspiration comes from my best friend, the dazzling woman from whom I received my name and my life's blood, Lorelai Gilmore.
Rory Gilmore: Hey, talk more like a ferret!
Rory: You know, I have actually thought about this moment. A lot. What would Jess say to me if I ever saw him again? I mean, he just took off, no note, no call, nothing, how could he explain that? And then a year goes by. No word, nothing, so he couldn't possibly have a good excuse for that, right? I have imagined hundreds of different scenarios with a hundred different great last parting lines, and I have to tell you that I am actually very curious to see which way this is going to go.
Rory Gilmore: 5 years? Cool... I've got about the next 2 and a half hours planned... then there's just darkness... and possibly some dragons.
Rory: [Rory and Paris are in Florida for spring break; both are drunk] Whoa, I'm loving the spinning beach.
Rory: It was interesting, you know. We sat on the beach, went to a club, watched the Power of Myths, Paris and I kissed...
Rory: I am late for class and you put a printing press on my backpack!
Rory: Okay, this is the textbook definition of a perfect moment.
Rory: My mom and I have been planning for my 21st birthday since... well, my first memory is kindergarten, but I have a feeling she was talking about it before that. We had this whole big thing planned.
Rory: I mean, how fair is that? He's gone, and then he shows up out of the blue, 'You can’t live here, this place is a dump, and by the way, I love you!' I love you? Is he serious?
Rory: Yeah, I'm a treat! I don't know what I'm gonna do, I don't think I can take running into him every day in the halls, and in the paper and the coffee cart... Oh my god! I'm gonna have to quit drinking coffee! And I love coffee!
Rory: My books looks sad. Can books look sad?
Rory Gilmore: Because, Logan had many many blondes for Thanksgiving.
Rory Gilmore: He cheated on me... with an entire wedding party.
Rory: [screams out, as an excuse to not answer the phone] I'm a cat with no legs!
Rory Gilmore: A trench coat would be too 'All the President's Men' but my blue coat would be too 'His Girl Friday.' I don't know!
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Grey's Anatomy: Addison Montgomery-Shepherd
Hi, I’m Addison Sheppard. And you must be the woman who's been screwing my husband.
She's young. That whole wide-eyed "ooh, he's a brain surgeon" thing happening, but still sweet. Which is what you were going for, right? The anti-Addison.
I flew all the way across the country to reminisce over wedding photos, get drunk, fall into bed, and make you realize you can't live without me. Relax, Derek, I'm here for work. I'm helming the T.T.T.S. case you guys admitted last week. And after Richard's briefing...
Actually I prefer to be called 'Ruler of All That is Evil', but I WILL answer to Satan...
It’s hard to accept the end when you're too close.
I am actively not thinking about you right now.
Seattle Grace is a teaching hospital. Part of your job is to teach. Your interns aren’t your slaves.
Happy people should have happy things happen to them.
It's not resignation, Richard, it's notification. I don't officially work for you. I came for one case, I can track the twins progress from New York.
I'm letting go of the preemie, you know that. He calls me Satan, Richard.
I just accidentally broke the news of my patient’s infidelity to her fiancée.
It's not a fight, he wins. I'm leaving in the morning.
The only reason we are talking like this right now is because I know you won’t remember a single word of this when the drugs wear off.
Just go back to you locker room and wait for your resident to give you instructions.
Put the ice on your hand.
He and Derek used to work together back in New York. And they, we, were all close friends. Until Derek found us in bed together.
Dr. Karev, I may be a board certified OB/GYN, but I also have fellowships in Maternal-Fetal medicine and Medical Genetics *and* am one of the foremost neonatal surgeons in this country. When you can top that, you can mouth off. Until then, you will do your job and you will do it right. Which at this point in time means you keep your mouth shut unless I give you permission to open it. Understood?
It’s not that I underestimate you; it’s just that I don’t think about you, at all.
I am not going to be sleeping with the help.
I’m so stupid for letting a cute hippie boy put needles in my face.
Pity. I've got three surgeries on the board. I was gonna ask you to scrub in but... I guess you should stay by that pregnant lady's side all day. You see to it, Dr. Bailey?
I want you to care. I sleep with your best friend and you walk away. He comes here from New York and rubs it in your face, and still you get a good night's sleep. What do I have to do? Oh, I know. Maybe I should sleep with the vet, because that's what it seems to take to send you into a blind rage. But wait, that won't work either because I'm not Meredith Grey!
Look, why don’t you pick a floor and stay on it, and I’ll pick a floor and stay on that, because I really need a moment or two without you. Your face shows up in my head, your panties show up in my husband’s pocket. Really, you’re everywhere, and I need a moment or two without you.
Ok. Except, you know. It felt like in the vets office this morning and again in the elevator, it felt like you two were having a "lovers' quarrel."
Did you hear about the slutty sex your slutty friend had with my super slutty husband?
So, I was um, thinking, we could have sex tonight.
I am desirable Amanda.
Good air in, bad air out.
A gathering of men outside the delivery room, how mid-century of you.
To be in that condition and have no one who knows you even know. She's all alone, it makes you think. You know? If I went missing would anyone notice I was gone?
What am I? The go to person for adultery?
Why do you think Mark moved so quickly? Do you think it’s because the orbital bone was floating towards the brain?
You're not god.
God wants you to be an adulterer?
An adulterous love child.
I’m the wicked witch who came in and ruined her life and cheated on Dr.... McDreamy.
Derek have you even considered that even if I’m Satan and an adulterous bitch that I might still be the love of your life?
What they’re doing is not about love, Derek. It’s like you. How you pretend to love me but you’re just using me to fill some need you have to be a good guy. Walk away, that’s all I get? What you’re not going to yell at me or call me names, or I don’t know, ignore me in an elevator? I want you to care! I sleep with your best friend and you walk away. He comes out here from New York and rubs it in your face, and still you get a good night’s sleep. What do I have to do? Oh, I know. Maybe what I should do is go out on a date with the vet. Because that seems to be something that sends you into a blind rage. Oh, but that won’t work either because I’m not Meredith Grey!
That’s what marriage is about. Compromise, right?
That’s what marriage is built on. Change. Change I what keeps marriages alive.
Just because I made what seems to be a transcontinental booty call, doesn’t mean we should try to make something out of this.
What's wrong with it? What's wrong? What's wrong is that I don't have time for it. I am out of time. I missed my chance. And now I only have two eggs left. I might as well have no eggs left. I am egg-less. Naomi says she's dried up; I'm the one who's dried up. I'm all barren and dried up. And I've clearly been wasting my time on men. I mean, I might as well take up hobbies or like needlepoint, or collecting those little ceramic dolls. Because that's what dried up women do, they do needlepoint. They don't waste their time flirting with men who clearly just want to get laid. They do not waste their time... telling overly personal... information about their eggs to total strangers, oh my god, I'm sorry.
I am being stalked by pregnant women.
I want someone stable, who barbecues; who teaches little kids how to play catch. He’s not Mark Sloan, which doesn’t explain why I spent the whole day looking at Alex Karev like a puppy at a chew toy.
People mess up.
I was jealous when there was no need to be.
Starting to think LA is like New York with a beach.
None of you go near Lisa or the baby until I say so. The child is not a possession you fight over.
When you’re obsessing about something like that there’s generally a reason.
Derek’s the kind of guy, I just knew he wouldn’t hurt me, not on purpose anyways, not the way I hurt him.
Derek, are you done, hurting me back? Because I need to know. I need to special order thicker skin or something.
She has nobody; she needs someone to fight for her.
I intend to fight like a girl. I’m going to let them kill each other, and then I’ll be the only one left standing.
Be the change you want to see in life.
Well isn't this cozy. Can I join in or are you not in to threesomes?
Sometimes people do desperate things to get attention. There are two sides of every story.
Nothing like a domestic dispute to liven up a pre-op, huh?
I don’t want someone who doesn’t want me, Meredith. But if there’s a slightest chance he does, I’m not leaving Seattle.
There is a land called ‘passive-aggressiva’ … and I am their queen.
Sometimes false labor is the body’s way of telling you to slow down.
I should of let him go. Should of stepped aside, been a better person. I should of... a lot of things.
When no one else is around, the elevator kinda talks to me.
Why am I the only girl? Am I the entertainment? I am not stripping.
Where I come from, elevators tend to be this kind of aphrodisiac, you know. People get on them and they just get all horny. It’s a relief to be on a not horny elevator. You know, get on. Ride, without the sex.
You know how long a baby can survive inside its dead mother? 4 to 5 minutes! Minutes, not seconds, Karev. Look at Melanie. Look at her. Now look around her, see all the doctors and nurses, even her parents? Their soul job is to take care of Melanie. My job is to care for that baby! Now I’ve got a surgery schedule so when I step foot on that elevator and leave, you are going to be the only person on this entire floor responsible for that baby! Do not let me down Karev.
This whole thing brings back very traumatic memories of being a band geek, with braces and a lisp, spending the whole evening with Skippy Gold talking about Star Wars... So, do you want to dance?
We do not get unlimited chance to have the things we want and this I know, nothing is worse than missing an opportunity that could change your life.
Try not to say everything that pops into your brain.
You have to learn distance, Dr. Stevens. You’ll be a better doctor for it.
Is that the reason why you want to go into plastics, ‘cause people sign up for the pain they get?
It does suck watching them struggle. And that part never stops sucking.
You stole my husband and I hugged you.
Okay, in L.A., people say things, but in Seattle, there's this strange culture of wordlessness, where in I am supposed to guess what one is feeling by the slight raise of an eyebrow or the beginnings of a frown. Any chance you want to tell me what's going on with you, Miranda?
Who’s the mystery woman Derek’s dating? Who’s the McRebound?
I can hear you. And I’m not hiding. I’m trying to pray, but I don’t know how to pray because I’m a WASP and we only go to church on Christmas.
People get divorced. They meet new people. They get remarried.
We call Meredith the 12 year old. What do we call Lexie? The Pre-schooler?
She's young. That whole wide-eyed "ooh, he's a brain surgeon" thing happening, but still sweet. Which is what you were going for, right? The anti-Addison.
I flew all the way across the country to reminisce over wedding photos, get drunk, fall into bed, and make you realize you can't live without me. Relax, Derek, I'm here for work. I'm helming the T.T.T.S. case you guys admitted last week. And after Richard's briefing...
Actually I prefer to be called 'Ruler of All That is Evil', but I WILL answer to Satan...
It’s hard to accept the end when you're too close.
I am actively not thinking about you right now.
Seattle Grace is a teaching hospital. Part of your job is to teach. Your interns aren’t your slaves.
Happy people should have happy things happen to them.
It's not resignation, Richard, it's notification. I don't officially work for you. I came for one case, I can track the twins progress from New York.
I'm letting go of the preemie, you know that. He calls me Satan, Richard.
I just accidentally broke the news of my patient’s infidelity to her fiancée.
It's not a fight, he wins. I'm leaving in the morning.
The only reason we are talking like this right now is because I know you won’t remember a single word of this when the drugs wear off.
Just go back to you locker room and wait for your resident to give you instructions.
Put the ice on your hand.
He and Derek used to work together back in New York. And they, we, were all close friends. Until Derek found us in bed together.
Dr. Karev, I may be a board certified OB/GYN, but I also have fellowships in Maternal-Fetal medicine and Medical Genetics *and* am one of the foremost neonatal surgeons in this country. When you can top that, you can mouth off. Until then, you will do your job and you will do it right. Which at this point in time means you keep your mouth shut unless I give you permission to open it. Understood?
It’s not that I underestimate you; it’s just that I don’t think about you, at all.
I am not going to be sleeping with the help.
I’m so stupid for letting a cute hippie boy put needles in my face.
Pity. I've got three surgeries on the board. I was gonna ask you to scrub in but... I guess you should stay by that pregnant lady's side all day. You see to it, Dr. Bailey?
I want you to care. I sleep with your best friend and you walk away. He comes here from New York and rubs it in your face, and still you get a good night's sleep. What do I have to do? Oh, I know. Maybe I should sleep with the vet, because that's what it seems to take to send you into a blind rage. But wait, that won't work either because I'm not Meredith Grey!
Look, why don’t you pick a floor and stay on it, and I’ll pick a floor and stay on that, because I really need a moment or two without you. Your face shows up in my head, your panties show up in my husband’s pocket. Really, you’re everywhere, and I need a moment or two without you.
Ok. Except, you know. It felt like in the vets office this morning and again in the elevator, it felt like you two were having a "lovers' quarrel."
Did you hear about the slutty sex your slutty friend had with my super slutty husband?
So, I was um, thinking, we could have sex tonight.
I am desirable Amanda.
Good air in, bad air out.
A gathering of men outside the delivery room, how mid-century of you.
To be in that condition and have no one who knows you even know. She's all alone, it makes you think. You know? If I went missing would anyone notice I was gone?
What am I? The go to person for adultery?
Why do you think Mark moved so quickly? Do you think it’s because the orbital bone was floating towards the brain?
You're not god.
God wants you to be an adulterer?
An adulterous love child.
I’m the wicked witch who came in and ruined her life and cheated on Dr.... McDreamy.
Derek have you even considered that even if I’m Satan and an adulterous bitch that I might still be the love of your life?
What they’re doing is not about love, Derek. It’s like you. How you pretend to love me but you’re just using me to fill some need you have to be a good guy. Walk away, that’s all I get? What you’re not going to yell at me or call me names, or I don’t know, ignore me in an elevator? I want you to care! I sleep with your best friend and you walk away. He comes out here from New York and rubs it in your face, and still you get a good night’s sleep. What do I have to do? Oh, I know. Maybe what I should do is go out on a date with the vet. Because that seems to be something that sends you into a blind rage. Oh, but that won’t work either because I’m not Meredith Grey!
That’s what marriage is about. Compromise, right?
That’s what marriage is built on. Change. Change I what keeps marriages alive.
Just because I made what seems to be a transcontinental booty call, doesn’t mean we should try to make something out of this.
What's wrong with it? What's wrong? What's wrong is that I don't have time for it. I am out of time. I missed my chance. And now I only have two eggs left. I might as well have no eggs left. I am egg-less. Naomi says she's dried up; I'm the one who's dried up. I'm all barren and dried up. And I've clearly been wasting my time on men. I mean, I might as well take up hobbies or like needlepoint, or collecting those little ceramic dolls. Because that's what dried up women do, they do needlepoint. They don't waste their time flirting with men who clearly just want to get laid. They do not waste their time... telling overly personal... information about their eggs to total strangers, oh my god, I'm sorry.
I am being stalked by pregnant women.
I want someone stable, who barbecues; who teaches little kids how to play catch. He’s not Mark Sloan, which doesn’t explain why I spent the whole day looking at Alex Karev like a puppy at a chew toy.
People mess up.
I was jealous when there was no need to be.
Starting to think LA is like New York with a beach.
None of you go near Lisa or the baby until I say so. The child is not a possession you fight over.
When you’re obsessing about something like that there’s generally a reason.
Derek’s the kind of guy, I just knew he wouldn’t hurt me, not on purpose anyways, not the way I hurt him.
Derek, are you done, hurting me back? Because I need to know. I need to special order thicker skin or something.
She has nobody; she needs someone to fight for her.
I intend to fight like a girl. I’m going to let them kill each other, and then I’ll be the only one left standing.
Be the change you want to see in life.
Well isn't this cozy. Can I join in or are you not in to threesomes?
Sometimes people do desperate things to get attention. There are two sides of every story.
Nothing like a domestic dispute to liven up a pre-op, huh?
I don’t want someone who doesn’t want me, Meredith. But if there’s a slightest chance he does, I’m not leaving Seattle.
There is a land called ‘passive-aggressiva’ … and I am their queen.
Sometimes false labor is the body’s way of telling you to slow down.
I should of let him go. Should of stepped aside, been a better person. I should of... a lot of things.
When no one else is around, the elevator kinda talks to me.
Why am I the only girl? Am I the entertainment? I am not stripping.
Where I come from, elevators tend to be this kind of aphrodisiac, you know. People get on them and they just get all horny. It’s a relief to be on a not horny elevator. You know, get on. Ride, without the sex.
You know how long a baby can survive inside its dead mother? 4 to 5 minutes! Minutes, not seconds, Karev. Look at Melanie. Look at her. Now look around her, see all the doctors and nurses, even her parents? Their soul job is to take care of Melanie. My job is to care for that baby! Now I’ve got a surgery schedule so when I step foot on that elevator and leave, you are going to be the only person on this entire floor responsible for that baby! Do not let me down Karev.
This whole thing brings back very traumatic memories of being a band geek, with braces and a lisp, spending the whole evening with Skippy Gold talking about Star Wars... So, do you want to dance?
We do not get unlimited chance to have the things we want and this I know, nothing is worse than missing an opportunity that could change your life.
Try not to say everything that pops into your brain.
You have to learn distance, Dr. Stevens. You’ll be a better doctor for it.
Is that the reason why you want to go into plastics, ‘cause people sign up for the pain they get?
It does suck watching them struggle. And that part never stops sucking.
You stole my husband and I hugged you.
Okay, in L.A., people say things, but in Seattle, there's this strange culture of wordlessness, where in I am supposed to guess what one is feeling by the slight raise of an eyebrow or the beginnings of a frown. Any chance you want to tell me what's going on with you, Miranda?
Who’s the mystery woman Derek’s dating? Who’s the McRebound?
I can hear you. And I’m not hiding. I’m trying to pray, but I don’t know how to pray because I’m a WASP and we only go to church on Christmas.
People get divorced. They meet new people. They get remarried.
We call Meredith the 12 year old. What do we call Lexie? The Pre-schooler?
Grey's Anatomy: Other Characters
Patricia, head nurse: With every fresh banana, always use a fresh condom.
Patricia, head nurse: When the time is right and gentleman, you'll all know when that time is, carefully open the condom packet and roll it onto the banana.
Patricia, head nurse: She knows your not in surgery. And she said to tell you, quote, "We are going to our niece's school pageant this morning. You have known about it for months. And after what you pulled on Thanksgiving...” and then she, started using a great many words I don't feel comfortable repeating.
Patricia, head nurse: And there was something about "divorce".
Patricia, head nurse: That’s why you don’t get any respect from the nurses; surgical arrogance.
Debbie, nurse: A little bit of respect and you could have saved yourself a very long day, Dr. Yang.
Debbie, nurse: Because I am not a bouncer and this is not a nightclub! I am doing what I can with extremely limited staff and resources and if you have a problem with that take it up with ‘Chief!’
Dr. Kent: Look I'm only here for one day and I don't need my ass kissed. All I need is to tell you what to do and you do it. And I don't like mistakes. Whatever, there's only one resident I want in my OR; a guy they call The Nazi. Do you know him? He gets a great word of mouth, stellar rep, balls the size of Texas?
Dr. Kent: We’ve got a line out the door for sutures. Everybody’s an amateur chef until they get a knife in their hands.
Nurse Olivia Harper: Another leech fell off and I can't get the new one to bite. I'm sorry, they just really freak me out.
Nurse Olivia Harper: People get lonely, George.
Nurse Olivia Harper: If she can’t love him back the way he loves her, then she doesn’t deserve him.
Nurse Olivia Harper: Change your own bedpans, Stevens!
Thatcher Grey: I spent years studying this board, holding a crying baby, trying to get an idea when my wife would get out of surgery. Appy takes about an hour. Anything with the word ‘cardio’ in it, I had to plan on never seeing her at all.
Thatcher Grey: I took her childhood; I can’t take any more from her.
Bomb Squad Captain, Dylan Young: Meredith, I want you to look at me. Look at me. I know this is bad. And I know that I'm this ass whose been yelling at you all day. So you pretend that I'm not; you pretend that I'm someone you like, whatever you need. But you need to listen to me.
Bomb Squad Captain, Dylan Young: The chief of surgery has authorized me to tell you you can not stay here.
Bomb Squad Captain, Dylan Young: You've got a sense of irony.
Bomb Squad Captain, Dylan Young: Meredith, this is not your brain on drugs. This is death. You are dead. You are really freaking dead. You're dirt dead, nap dead. No more you, dead.
Bomb Squad Captain, Dylan Young: You know what? That's why I don't like to be here with you. Because you don't assess the situation, you just dive right in.
Tim: To remind you... that you're not dried up.
Dr. Sidney Heron: My philosophy is “heal with love.”
Dr. Sidney Heron: Standing up for what he believes in, that’s my kind of little girl.
Dr. Sydney Heron: Dr. Yang wanted to be sure that perky little bimbo cheerleader wasn't in here trying to kill a patient. Am I right? Now with all do respect Dr. Burke, I know you don't know me very well, but I'm pretty good at what I do. And my patient is a 25 year old marathoner and I told her husband I'm going to try and save her leg. So my plan is to stand here for as many hours as it takes to scrape away every last cell of necrotic flesh. Now when I'm done, if it's still spreading, then we'll take the leg. And if we do, then our eager young intern here can hold the saw. Now unlike Dr. Karev, kindness and compassion aren't very high on her list of priorities, but a little bone-saw action, well maybe that will earn me some respect. Am I right? Now Dr. Yang, you ready to scrub back in?
Dr. Sidney Heron: I lost a kid, my first year. It was my fault, and I just couldn’t… so I had a breakdown, they gave me time off, and when I came back I put a smile on my face and everybody thought I was fine. I lost a kid. It comes in waves, Izzie. There’s a low and then another wave hits you. I wasn’t trying to pry, I just wanted you to know that it’s okay not to be fine sometimes.
Dr. Sidney Heron: Meredith is cleansing. In tribal culture, when one wants to cleanse a past, one cuts off all of one’s hair and buries it in the earth. You might try that, too.
Dr. Sidney Heron: Derek, I’m a lot of woman. I bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, serve it on eggs or in a sandwich, or crumbled up in a tossed salad. Not just bacon. But Derek I bring a lot of things to the table, and I’m looking for a man who can do the same. A man who can meet my needs. All my needs. I just don’t think you’re ready.
Dr. Wyatt: Yes, horrible things do happen. Happiness in the face of all of that... that's not the goal. Feeling the horrible and knowing that you're not gonna die from those feelings, that's the point.
Dr. Wyatt: And you're not done. You've made progress because you're feeling and you're telling me about it. Six months ago, it would've been just you and a bottle of tequila. My door is always open.
Dr. Wyatt: It’s a relationship. People make mistakes.
Jane Burke: Did I hear you refer to Miranda Bailey as a Nazi? You do understand that the Nazis were responsible for the worst genocide in the history of man, and a racist genocide as that. I would think that as a woman of color and as a doctor nonetheless, that you would think twice before using that word as a punch line.
Jane Burke: It’s not that I don’t like you. I think you’re a very smart, attractive woman, but you’re selfish. You pulled him out of a sick bed because you were uncomfortable. That’s selfish. You’re selfish, and my son is giving. And the combination is, well, it’s not going to last, not much longer.
Jane Burke: When you stood up in front of Preston’s friends and loved one and you said, ‘It’s over. It’s over. It’s so over.’ Were you trying to smash the hopes of the best man or were just trying to be funny? Because making light of that situation would be inappropriate and to use that moment to send a message to your boyfriend, well that’s selfish. So were you being inappropriate or were you being selfish?
Jane Burke: Once you’re in, you’re in. Be sure to have that engraved on your wedding ring once you’re married.
Jane Burke: George O’Malley, Burke’s friend, Burke’s guy. Staying in a marriage out of obligation, that’s no way to live, that’s no way to love. But I think you know that.
Jane Burke: Honorable men are all built the same.
Jane Burke: Do you know when to walk away? Do you know when not to take less than you deserve? If you do, then you’re an honorable man.
Dr. Swindler: My miracle case is on life support. I thought I had one. One miracle. I hate this job sometimes.
PARAMEDIC: You don't stick your hand inside of a patient when you don't know how he was injured. You don't stick your hand inside of a patient at all.
Clay Bedonie: You have your beliefs, I have mine.
Dr. Virginia Dixon: I don't have beliefs, I have science.
Clay Bedonie: Science is a belief, belief in only what you can see and touch. I believe in more.
Nurse Liz Fallon: I always divided surgeons into two categories: those who remember their patients, and those who didn’t. They always remember their surgeries though, every damn suture.
Nurse Liz Fallon: The Ellis Grey I know didn’t have regards for anyone I know except Ellis Grey.
Dr. Pete Wilder: I think why would I want to be attached to someone who doesn’t want to be attached to me?
Dr. Colin: She used to say to me that marriage was for the weak and undirected.
Nancy Jennings: Could you go tell Celeste? She’s a basket case and I don’t have it in me to take of my husband’s girlfriend right now. Of course I know. The wife always knows.
Dr. Naomi Bennett: A baby is not really an answer. It’s more a crying, puking answer.
Dr. Naomi Bennett: Nobody over thirty goes to the beach.
Dr. Naomi Bennett: You can’t use a movie made before you as your defense.
Dr. Violet Turner: You can’t be a man with your friend.
Dr. Violet Turner: Cooper, you’re blocking the caffeine. If you move, I’ll give you a cookie.
Dr. Cooper Freedman: I don’t go to hookers. I don’t go to strip clubs. I meet women on the internet that wanna meet me. So I like them a little younger, and a little dirtier. Is that wrong? That’s wrong?
Dr. Sam Bennett: You better be crying over that car and not Sexyboobs313.
Dr. Sam Bennett: Don’t talk about your penis while you hug another man.
Mrs. Shepherd: You have very low expectations for yourself, Mark Sloan. Since a little boy, you always have. And it’s time to raise them. You have the emotional maturity of a horny fifteen year old. You need young.
Mrs. Shepherd: I know enough. I know it’s easier to have compassion with a person than a murderer.
Black intern: Whoever it was, whoever rode him and broke him, that’s a girl I want on me.
Rose, nurse: Hospital is no better than high school.
Rose, nurse: my voice shakes when I’m nervous, it means I’m an imperfect person. It doesn’t mean I can’t fix the computer.
Rose, nurse: You want to insult my education or do you want me to help save your patient?
Rose, nurse: So not calling me after the sex is you being a dedicated life saver?
Rose, nurse: Before you existed, I was good. Every doctor in this hospital wanted me in their OR. I was known as a damn good scrub nurse. And now, I’m the crazy girl out of Fatal Attraction that goes around stabbing surgeons.
Rose, nurse: That’s kind of your thing, right? Juggling more than one person at a time?
White Supremacist Paramedic: I’m not the devil. I’m just a guy with a belief system.
Mrs. Archer: Surgery is barbaric. You tear flesh and spill blood. I work with light. I work with energy. I visualize healing. And even if there’s the slightest chance that what I do works, isn’t that preferable?
Phillip Robinson, bear attack patient: We’re newlyweds. She’s my rebound girl. She thought she was my rebound girl. I rebounded her all the way to the church. Only knew her ten days. When you know, you know, ya know.
Scott Robinson, bear attack patient: Dude, you married your midlife crisis.
Phillip Robinson, clinical trial patient: Jennifer we’re in a hospital full of eligible doctors and you’re a waitress with no prospects who needs to learn how to use her ass to catch a new guy before I bite the dust!
Phillip Robinson, clinical trial patient: Just because I’m blind doesn’t mean you can ignore me you sick twisted bastard! Playing games with people’s lives slicing open people’s brains.
Greta, clinical patient: Do you know how precious that is, time with someone you love?
Jeremy, clinical trial patient: Don’t you dare die. We’re not finished yet. I’m not finished loving you.
Tapley: Learning is like healing, it happens over time. Listen, keep running, not because you want to cut corners but because it makes you a better doctor.
Anna, ball gown patient: It’s pathetic, isn’t it? A married woman cheats on her best friend with her husband. You can’t go much lower than that.
Anna, ball gown patient: Little pieces of you get chipped away but another person and you shaved yourself away so that you’ll fit together. Then one day you look up and you don’t even know who you are.
Steve, intern: I draw a line at a tube in my penis. Line drawn.
Seth, patient’s husband: I’m not going to crap into a bowl until you admit it was a pimple.
Dr. Virgina Dixon: There are people dying right now, there are people dying. It’s inappropriate. I was talking about the brain dead girl. She can’t hear her sister, she can’t feel her hands. There are patients dying right now and those organs would keep them alive. Leave feelings out of it, leave them out of the science, leave them out of the decision making, because people are dying as we speak.
Dr. Virginia Dixon: It wasn’t appropriate but I’ve come to accept that from pediatric surgeons always breaking protocol. You touch the child whenever you speak with her. You explain conditions to the child, not just the parents, and then you react to the patient as if your own child and you break protocol which is inappropriate except in the case of pediatric surgery where protocols are constantly evolving. You are not a general surgeon. You are a pediatric surgeon.
Dunn, Prisoner: We’re not that different you and I. People are alive when they meet us, it all changes somehow.
Dunn: Would you fix a broken television before you throw it out?
Dunn: What are you so scared of Dr. Shepherd? Losing control? Or maybe, deep down, you know you’re no better than I am. You decide who lives and dies all the time but for you they call it medicine, not a capital offense.
Dunn: It would be good to have a friendly face in the crowd, when they kill me.
Sadie: My life is in pieces. All the time, I just keep breaking. As soon as I fix one, another goes down.
Mrs. Shepherd: I know it’s easier to have compassion for a good person than a murderer.
Jen, Brain aneurism pregnant patient: Brad proposed to me in a supermarket aisle. He said that was the first time he saw me. I said yes between the cat food and tampons.
Jen: You just told me there’s a time bomb in my head. I promise you I’m not going to stay calm.
Dr. Campbell: It’s just like a calculator. Just because there’s a machine to do if for them, children should have to learn simple arithmetic?
Band dork: Once you spaz out in front of the whole school, friends are kind of hard to come by.
Band dork: When most people see you as sick they don’t see you as anything else.
Stomach cancer patient: The reason Trish decides everything, Thanksgiving, dinners, vacations, she’s the only one left who knows how to cook a turkey, Mike. She’s the only one left who likes planning vacations. And she’s the only one left who remembers to make dinner reservations. She’s in charge of us because everyone else is dead. I want it. Now. I want the surgery right now.
Trish, stomach cancer patient: You don’t leave the people you love alone, Dr. Grey. That idiot may not know it yet but my fear is going to be what saves his life.
Dave, face transplant patient: Who am I kidding? It’s a face, right. If it’s anything above a point and stare freak, I’m gonna call it a success.
Mr. Torres: You don’t have children do you? No you don’t, because if you did, ‘Your daughter’s a grown woman,’ that means nothing. She’s my child. She’s like blood running through your veins. You don’t outgrow it, never goes away. The love, the need to protect from everything, even from themselves. They grow up, they move out, they change. Become people you don’t even recognize, make decisions. Then they think you don’t love them because you don’t understand. That’s the opposite. See it’s the opposite. You fight for them, always. You never surrender, or your child is on the line, you never surrender.
Mrs. Stevens: Life gave her lemons and she made cantaloupes.
Mrs. Stevens: When you have a sick child Cricket, money’s not really the first thing on your mind.
Mrs. Stevens: You don’t have skin on your organs, that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense.
Becca, patient: Today’s the day my life begins. Today I become a citizen of the world. Today I become a grown up. Today I become accountable to someone other than myself and my parents, accountable for more than my grades. Today I become accountable to the world, to the future, to all the possibilities that life has to offer, starting today. My job is to show up, wide eyed and willing and ready. For what? I don’t know. For anything. For everything. To take on life, to take on love, to take on the responsibility and possibility. Today, my friends, our lives begin, and I, for one, can’t wait.
Charlie, amputation patient: you think I don’t know that? You think I want to cut my leg off? Of course not! Am I sure about this? No. the only thing I’m sure about is that I know I’m in hell right now. That I am sure of. I’ve lost everything. Everything I’ve worked for, everything I care about. I’ve traded it in for a six times a day pain pill that doesn’t even work. So don’t waste both our times by trying to scare me because you do not scare me, Dr. Torres. After everything I’ve been through, nothing scares me. So are we going to do this or not?
Dr. Swindler: There is no cure for cancer, Dr. Yang. There’s only us, the two of us, right here, right now, fighting this thing as aggressively as we know how. And sometimes that means pumping toxins into the patient to kill the cancer. And yes, sometimes, not very often, but sometimes those toxins kill the patient as well. But Alison had three months to live when she came to see me and I have managed to keep her alive for two years. So I am not about to give up on her or the IL-2 anytime soon and neither are you.
Amanda, patient: We start with the cold shoulder, you’re right on track. Then we go to our girlfriends and bitch, then our girlfriends say, ‘You want to build a future, build it yourself.’ We don’t need a man to give you that, so you want to buy a house, buy a house.
It’s like watching a living freak show.
Clara, boating accident patient: She made me from scratch. That’s what she always says. Like when I wanted to go skydiving, you know, ‘don’t jump out of a plane Clara, I made that body from scratch.’ When I sprained my ankle, ‘Be more careful darling, I made that ankle from scratch.’
Irvine, patient: Let me tell you about the Golden Years. There’s got to be more to life than eating pudding and watching CSI. Now, come on, can you give an old man a working Johnson?
Irvine: Let’s stop pretending she’s going to college. She’s pretty, but she’s not too sharp.
Irvine: You’re just a kid, Doc, you won’t understand, but one day you’re gonna wake up and all the big stuff, all the milestones you’ve been looking forward to, graduation, wedding, having kids, your grandkids, it’s all behind you. It’s all over. All you’ve got is a bunch of yesterdays and very few tomorrows.
Billy, patient: She found her footing, in the back of your neck. Find your open window. Everyone has one. A weak spot, undefended, an open window, a key hidden in a fake rock. That’s how I do it.
Billy, patient: ‘You’re not just a good doctor, you’re a great doctor. You are the future of medicine.’ ‘Only you can keep you down.’ And my favorite: ‘No one can tell it’s plastic surgery.’ I think it’s the nose but it could be the boobs. What do you think?
Isaac: If you ever become frightened, instead become inspired.
Wallace’s mother: Bad dreams, bad dreams, go away. Good dreams, good dreams, here to stay.
Hilary: Dad please, the last thing I am is a disappointment. I’m on honor roll. I run the student council. I basically am the school paper. And I tutor kids with reading problems. Okay, I am every parent’s dream come true including yours. I was exploring the bounds of my consciousness with the help of a mushroom. I made a calculated risk going on that roof, falling off, well, that was a low probability of it, even though low probability of events occasionally occurs. And this one did. So yeah, you’re bummed. I miscalculated because it reminds you of your own unfathomed ability. I’m bummed too. Let’s just leave it at that.
Dr. Singer, patient: Oh yes you’re going in there. So what, he got you pregnant. You’re going to go right into that school and show those cheerleaders that you have nothing to be ashamed of. Those little bitches are poisonous.
Dr. Singer: Are you crazy? I’m never going back to those sex-crazed, teenage alcoholics. No way.
Patient’s boyfriend: Does it make me awful to say I was slightly disappointed? I guess I was just sitting out here thinking, ‘Now he’s going to be like the rest of us who teach and direct and do all the things he finds demeaning.’ You know what’s demeaning? Loving a man, taking care of him, doing his shopping, making his meals, making sure his humidifiers are clean. God forbid his humidifiers aren’t clean. What’s demeaning is loving a man who thinks so little of you.
Dr. Baylor: You don’t have wants or needs, you’re an intern. The bottom of the surgical food chain. I am a resident. I’ve been here three years, you’ve been here three days. Do the math. Draw her blood.
Harper Avery: Was it a student? Board member’s wife? No one gives up the Chief of Surgery gig and they don’t ask you to unless it’s for something juicy so who were you slipping it to?
Harper: Being awake for my own surgery, what an opportunity like this to be a student again in a new perspective. It’s what we got into this business for in the first place. Those moments that challenge and terrify, dare us to reach the potential we were meant to reach. Let’s stop the talk, and get into the OR and teach those kids, teach ourselves what it means to be great.
Harper: No! I decide when it’s enough. You think that I am arrogant and overbearing and maybe I am, but I am also you’re only living grandfather and it has become very clear to me today that my time is coming.
Molly, patient’s girlfriend: What? Pick up women? You mean, how do you explain your boobs to the next chick who’s dumb enough to date you?
Cancer patient: It’s like I’m applying to die.
Cancer patient: I would like to end my life through physician’s suicide.
Patient’s daughter: I’m nine and you just spelled sex.
Mrs. Corso: It’s easy to make jokes about him. You didn’t know him before. You don’t know that inside all of that, I’ve always known. He can make me laugh til I can’t breathe. He’s been trying to make you guys laugh all day but you’re all too disgusted to smile or joke with him, make him feel like a person. I brought him here because I thought you could help him, but you’re only making him feel worse. S unless you want to tell me the next step to getting him out of here and home I don’t want to hear anything from you.
Dr. Ben Warren: Now, woman, I am naked and I look good. Now are you going to sit there and lecture me or are you going to let me take you into my bedroom and have my way with you?
Mary, patient: Full of fresh blood, it’s disgusting. It’s like I’m a vampire or something.
Mary: She knows. Girls always know.
Dr. Percy: Nobody named Charlie ever got the girl. Charlie Brown. Charlie Manson.
Dr. Percy: You’re trading sex for surgery. That’s prostitution. Is that the part I’m supposed to get over?
Dr. Percy: I know you of Yang, she gives you the warm and fuzzies with her magical, special, heart skills but those lungs your transplanting belong to a patient of mine and it would mean a lot to turn his death into something meaningful.
Dr. Percy: Can you find her and tell her I loved her? I loved her so much. You tell her I was a catch. I was a hot, hot catch. And she missed out on a great guy. And you tell her I was a brave, even if I turn coward and start crying and asking for my mom in a second. You tell her I died brave, okay?
Dr. Percy: Well, you know what they say about people with big feet.
Dr. Percy: And some doctors enjoy torturing patients because they messed up and don’t know what they’re going to do with the rest of their lives.
Sloane: I don’t want to know where to come back to. If I give him to you guys, it’s still my baby. I need him to be somebody else’s. I mean, my dad got a clean break from me, and look at him now. Don’t I deserve that?
Kristy: Finally getting some junk in this trunk.
Henry: No, I don't blame her. I was proposing for all the wrong reasons. I mean I liked her and all, but what I liked most about her was her PPO.
Henry: You saved my life this morning, and that deserves a toast even if it wasn't a real wedding.
Dr. Fields: That's how you get a woman to tear her own body apart. You promise her a baby.
Henry: I just have to say this. I basically spent the past hour on a date with William myself, and I don't know how much you know about the guy, but this is what I know. Um, he wears driving gloves, yeah. And he doesn't live with his mother, but until recently he lived above her house. And he used the word "shan't", and he wasn't being funny. And he has yet to tell a story about himself in which he is not the hero. And as your husband, I think we can do better.
Dr. Stark: Pediatric surgeons can be heartless wretches. Some would argue that I'm a case in point. But social workers, on the other hand, are bleeding hearts.
Lucy: Because even though you're whole rap is about self-confidence, you're about as self-assured as a chihuahua.
Eli: Inside the hospital you're the man. That's the protocol, but outside I'm the man. I am the man. Me. Now you can call me cro magnon or old fashion, but that's not going to stop me from taking you home to my bed tonight and showing you what kind of man I am. Now how's that? Does that protocol suit you?
Henry: I've been thinking lately, and I think...um...I think I've figured it out...why all of your dates go so bad, so, so bad, laughably bad, and it's not your fault—it's mine because I'm not the guy on them with you.
Henry: If unibrows were my thing, I'd be all over that.
Henry: I really tried to be a gentleman about all this, but now you need to get the hell out. Letting you go was the worst thing I've ever done. It's the most painful thing I've ever done, and I'm a guy who's had 82 surgeries. My threshold for pain is pretty high. You need to get out. I'm not your best bud. I'm not your security blanket. I'm a man who's in love you who waltzed you into the arms of a damn knight on a horse. So, go to Germany and have little spaetzle-eating children. And please, for God's sake, leave me alone.
Patricia, head nurse: When the time is right and gentleman, you'll all know when that time is, carefully open the condom packet and roll it onto the banana.
Patricia, head nurse: She knows your not in surgery. And she said to tell you, quote, "We are going to our niece's school pageant this morning. You have known about it for months. And after what you pulled on Thanksgiving...” and then she, started using a great many words I don't feel comfortable repeating.
Patricia, head nurse: And there was something about "divorce".
Patricia, head nurse: That’s why you don’t get any respect from the nurses; surgical arrogance.
Debbie, nurse: A little bit of respect and you could have saved yourself a very long day, Dr. Yang.
Debbie, nurse: Because I am not a bouncer and this is not a nightclub! I am doing what I can with extremely limited staff and resources and if you have a problem with that take it up with ‘Chief!’
Dr. Kent: Look I'm only here for one day and I don't need my ass kissed. All I need is to tell you what to do and you do it. And I don't like mistakes. Whatever, there's only one resident I want in my OR; a guy they call The Nazi. Do you know him? He gets a great word of mouth, stellar rep, balls the size of Texas?
Dr. Kent: We’ve got a line out the door for sutures. Everybody’s an amateur chef until they get a knife in their hands.
Nurse Olivia Harper: Another leech fell off and I can't get the new one to bite. I'm sorry, they just really freak me out.
Nurse Olivia Harper: People get lonely, George.
Nurse Olivia Harper: If she can’t love him back the way he loves her, then she doesn’t deserve him.
Nurse Olivia Harper: Change your own bedpans, Stevens!
Thatcher Grey: I spent years studying this board, holding a crying baby, trying to get an idea when my wife would get out of surgery. Appy takes about an hour. Anything with the word ‘cardio’ in it, I had to plan on never seeing her at all.
Thatcher Grey: I took her childhood; I can’t take any more from her.
Bomb Squad Captain, Dylan Young: Meredith, I want you to look at me. Look at me. I know this is bad. And I know that I'm this ass whose been yelling at you all day. So you pretend that I'm not; you pretend that I'm someone you like, whatever you need. But you need to listen to me.
Bomb Squad Captain, Dylan Young: The chief of surgery has authorized me to tell you you can not stay here.
Bomb Squad Captain, Dylan Young: You've got a sense of irony.
Bomb Squad Captain, Dylan Young: Meredith, this is not your brain on drugs. This is death. You are dead. You are really freaking dead. You're dirt dead, nap dead. No more you, dead.
Bomb Squad Captain, Dylan Young: You know what? That's why I don't like to be here with you. Because you don't assess the situation, you just dive right in.
Tim: To remind you... that you're not dried up.
Dr. Sidney Heron: My philosophy is “heal with love.”
Dr. Sidney Heron: Standing up for what he believes in, that’s my kind of little girl.
Dr. Sydney Heron: Dr. Yang wanted to be sure that perky little bimbo cheerleader wasn't in here trying to kill a patient. Am I right? Now with all do respect Dr. Burke, I know you don't know me very well, but I'm pretty good at what I do. And my patient is a 25 year old marathoner and I told her husband I'm going to try and save her leg. So my plan is to stand here for as many hours as it takes to scrape away every last cell of necrotic flesh. Now when I'm done, if it's still spreading, then we'll take the leg. And if we do, then our eager young intern here can hold the saw. Now unlike Dr. Karev, kindness and compassion aren't very high on her list of priorities, but a little bone-saw action, well maybe that will earn me some respect. Am I right? Now Dr. Yang, you ready to scrub back in?
Dr. Sidney Heron: I lost a kid, my first year. It was my fault, and I just couldn’t… so I had a breakdown, they gave me time off, and when I came back I put a smile on my face and everybody thought I was fine. I lost a kid. It comes in waves, Izzie. There’s a low and then another wave hits you. I wasn’t trying to pry, I just wanted you to know that it’s okay not to be fine sometimes.
Dr. Sidney Heron: Meredith is cleansing. In tribal culture, when one wants to cleanse a past, one cuts off all of one’s hair and buries it in the earth. You might try that, too.
Dr. Sidney Heron: Derek, I’m a lot of woman. I bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, serve it on eggs or in a sandwich, or crumbled up in a tossed salad. Not just bacon. But Derek I bring a lot of things to the table, and I’m looking for a man who can do the same. A man who can meet my needs. All my needs. I just don’t think you’re ready.
Dr. Wyatt: Yes, horrible things do happen. Happiness in the face of all of that... that's not the goal. Feeling the horrible and knowing that you're not gonna die from those feelings, that's the point.
Dr. Wyatt: And you're not done. You've made progress because you're feeling and you're telling me about it. Six months ago, it would've been just you and a bottle of tequila. My door is always open.
Dr. Wyatt: It’s a relationship. People make mistakes.
Jane Burke: Did I hear you refer to Miranda Bailey as a Nazi? You do understand that the Nazis were responsible for the worst genocide in the history of man, and a racist genocide as that. I would think that as a woman of color and as a doctor nonetheless, that you would think twice before using that word as a punch line.
Jane Burke: It’s not that I don’t like you. I think you’re a very smart, attractive woman, but you’re selfish. You pulled him out of a sick bed because you were uncomfortable. That’s selfish. You’re selfish, and my son is giving. And the combination is, well, it’s not going to last, not much longer.
Jane Burke: When you stood up in front of Preston’s friends and loved one and you said, ‘It’s over. It’s over. It’s so over.’ Were you trying to smash the hopes of the best man or were just trying to be funny? Because making light of that situation would be inappropriate and to use that moment to send a message to your boyfriend, well that’s selfish. So were you being inappropriate or were you being selfish?
Jane Burke: Once you’re in, you’re in. Be sure to have that engraved on your wedding ring once you’re married.
Jane Burke: George O’Malley, Burke’s friend, Burke’s guy. Staying in a marriage out of obligation, that’s no way to live, that’s no way to love. But I think you know that.
Jane Burke: Honorable men are all built the same.
Jane Burke: Do you know when to walk away? Do you know when not to take less than you deserve? If you do, then you’re an honorable man.
Dr. Swindler: My miracle case is on life support. I thought I had one. One miracle. I hate this job sometimes.
PARAMEDIC: You don't stick your hand inside of a patient when you don't know how he was injured. You don't stick your hand inside of a patient at all.
Clay Bedonie: You have your beliefs, I have mine.
Dr. Virginia Dixon: I don't have beliefs, I have science.
Clay Bedonie: Science is a belief, belief in only what you can see and touch. I believe in more.
Nurse Liz Fallon: I always divided surgeons into two categories: those who remember their patients, and those who didn’t. They always remember their surgeries though, every damn suture.
Nurse Liz Fallon: The Ellis Grey I know didn’t have regards for anyone I know except Ellis Grey.
Dr. Pete Wilder: I think why would I want to be attached to someone who doesn’t want to be attached to me?
Dr. Colin: She used to say to me that marriage was for the weak and undirected.
Nancy Jennings: Could you go tell Celeste? She’s a basket case and I don’t have it in me to take of my husband’s girlfriend right now. Of course I know. The wife always knows.
Dr. Naomi Bennett: A baby is not really an answer. It’s more a crying, puking answer.
Dr. Naomi Bennett: Nobody over thirty goes to the beach.
Dr. Naomi Bennett: You can’t use a movie made before you as your defense.
Dr. Violet Turner: You can’t be a man with your friend.
Dr. Violet Turner: Cooper, you’re blocking the caffeine. If you move, I’ll give you a cookie.
Dr. Cooper Freedman: I don’t go to hookers. I don’t go to strip clubs. I meet women on the internet that wanna meet me. So I like them a little younger, and a little dirtier. Is that wrong? That’s wrong?
Dr. Sam Bennett: You better be crying over that car and not Sexyboobs313.
Dr. Sam Bennett: Don’t talk about your penis while you hug another man.
Mrs. Shepherd: You have very low expectations for yourself, Mark Sloan. Since a little boy, you always have. And it’s time to raise them. You have the emotional maturity of a horny fifteen year old. You need young.
Mrs. Shepherd: I know enough. I know it’s easier to have compassion with a person than a murderer.
Black intern: Whoever it was, whoever rode him and broke him, that’s a girl I want on me.
Rose, nurse: Hospital is no better than high school.
Rose, nurse: my voice shakes when I’m nervous, it means I’m an imperfect person. It doesn’t mean I can’t fix the computer.
Rose, nurse: You want to insult my education or do you want me to help save your patient?
Rose, nurse: So not calling me after the sex is you being a dedicated life saver?
Rose, nurse: Before you existed, I was good. Every doctor in this hospital wanted me in their OR. I was known as a damn good scrub nurse. And now, I’m the crazy girl out of Fatal Attraction that goes around stabbing surgeons.
Rose, nurse: That’s kind of your thing, right? Juggling more than one person at a time?
White Supremacist Paramedic: I’m not the devil. I’m just a guy with a belief system.
Mrs. Archer: Surgery is barbaric. You tear flesh and spill blood. I work with light. I work with energy. I visualize healing. And even if there’s the slightest chance that what I do works, isn’t that preferable?
Phillip Robinson, bear attack patient: We’re newlyweds. She’s my rebound girl. She thought she was my rebound girl. I rebounded her all the way to the church. Only knew her ten days. When you know, you know, ya know.
Scott Robinson, bear attack patient: Dude, you married your midlife crisis.
Phillip Robinson, clinical trial patient: Jennifer we’re in a hospital full of eligible doctors and you’re a waitress with no prospects who needs to learn how to use her ass to catch a new guy before I bite the dust!
Phillip Robinson, clinical trial patient: Just because I’m blind doesn’t mean you can ignore me you sick twisted bastard! Playing games with people’s lives slicing open people’s brains.
Greta, clinical patient: Do you know how precious that is, time with someone you love?
Jeremy, clinical trial patient: Don’t you dare die. We’re not finished yet. I’m not finished loving you.
Tapley: Learning is like healing, it happens over time. Listen, keep running, not because you want to cut corners but because it makes you a better doctor.
Anna, ball gown patient: It’s pathetic, isn’t it? A married woman cheats on her best friend with her husband. You can’t go much lower than that.
Anna, ball gown patient: Little pieces of you get chipped away but another person and you shaved yourself away so that you’ll fit together. Then one day you look up and you don’t even know who you are.
Steve, intern: I draw a line at a tube in my penis. Line drawn.
Seth, patient’s husband: I’m not going to crap into a bowl until you admit it was a pimple.
Dr. Virgina Dixon: There are people dying right now, there are people dying. It’s inappropriate. I was talking about the brain dead girl. She can’t hear her sister, she can’t feel her hands. There are patients dying right now and those organs would keep them alive. Leave feelings out of it, leave them out of the science, leave them out of the decision making, because people are dying as we speak.
Dr. Virginia Dixon: It wasn’t appropriate but I’ve come to accept that from pediatric surgeons always breaking protocol. You touch the child whenever you speak with her. You explain conditions to the child, not just the parents, and then you react to the patient as if your own child and you break protocol which is inappropriate except in the case of pediatric surgery where protocols are constantly evolving. You are not a general surgeon. You are a pediatric surgeon.
Dunn, Prisoner: We’re not that different you and I. People are alive when they meet us, it all changes somehow.
Dunn: Would you fix a broken television before you throw it out?
Dunn: What are you so scared of Dr. Shepherd? Losing control? Or maybe, deep down, you know you’re no better than I am. You decide who lives and dies all the time but for you they call it medicine, not a capital offense.
Dunn: It would be good to have a friendly face in the crowd, when they kill me.
Sadie: My life is in pieces. All the time, I just keep breaking. As soon as I fix one, another goes down.
Mrs. Shepherd: I know it’s easier to have compassion for a good person than a murderer.
Jen, Brain aneurism pregnant patient: Brad proposed to me in a supermarket aisle. He said that was the first time he saw me. I said yes between the cat food and tampons.
Jen: You just told me there’s a time bomb in my head. I promise you I’m not going to stay calm.
Dr. Campbell: It’s just like a calculator. Just because there’s a machine to do if for them, children should have to learn simple arithmetic?
Band dork: Once you spaz out in front of the whole school, friends are kind of hard to come by.
Band dork: When most people see you as sick they don’t see you as anything else.
Stomach cancer patient: The reason Trish decides everything, Thanksgiving, dinners, vacations, she’s the only one left who knows how to cook a turkey, Mike. She’s the only one left who likes planning vacations. And she’s the only one left who remembers to make dinner reservations. She’s in charge of us because everyone else is dead. I want it. Now. I want the surgery right now.
Trish, stomach cancer patient: You don’t leave the people you love alone, Dr. Grey. That idiot may not know it yet but my fear is going to be what saves his life.
Dave, face transplant patient: Who am I kidding? It’s a face, right. If it’s anything above a point and stare freak, I’m gonna call it a success.
Mr. Torres: You don’t have children do you? No you don’t, because if you did, ‘Your daughter’s a grown woman,’ that means nothing. She’s my child. She’s like blood running through your veins. You don’t outgrow it, never goes away. The love, the need to protect from everything, even from themselves. They grow up, they move out, they change. Become people you don’t even recognize, make decisions. Then they think you don’t love them because you don’t understand. That’s the opposite. See it’s the opposite. You fight for them, always. You never surrender, or your child is on the line, you never surrender.
Mrs. Stevens: Life gave her lemons and she made cantaloupes.
Mrs. Stevens: When you have a sick child Cricket, money’s not really the first thing on your mind.
Mrs. Stevens: You don’t have skin on your organs, that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense.
Becca, patient: Today’s the day my life begins. Today I become a citizen of the world. Today I become a grown up. Today I become accountable to someone other than myself and my parents, accountable for more than my grades. Today I become accountable to the world, to the future, to all the possibilities that life has to offer, starting today. My job is to show up, wide eyed and willing and ready. For what? I don’t know. For anything. For everything. To take on life, to take on love, to take on the responsibility and possibility. Today, my friends, our lives begin, and I, for one, can’t wait.
Charlie, amputation patient: you think I don’t know that? You think I want to cut my leg off? Of course not! Am I sure about this? No. the only thing I’m sure about is that I know I’m in hell right now. That I am sure of. I’ve lost everything. Everything I’ve worked for, everything I care about. I’ve traded it in for a six times a day pain pill that doesn’t even work. So don’t waste both our times by trying to scare me because you do not scare me, Dr. Torres. After everything I’ve been through, nothing scares me. So are we going to do this or not?
Dr. Swindler: There is no cure for cancer, Dr. Yang. There’s only us, the two of us, right here, right now, fighting this thing as aggressively as we know how. And sometimes that means pumping toxins into the patient to kill the cancer. And yes, sometimes, not very often, but sometimes those toxins kill the patient as well. But Alison had three months to live when she came to see me and I have managed to keep her alive for two years. So I am not about to give up on her or the IL-2 anytime soon and neither are you.
Amanda, patient: We start with the cold shoulder, you’re right on track. Then we go to our girlfriends and bitch, then our girlfriends say, ‘You want to build a future, build it yourself.’ We don’t need a man to give you that, so you want to buy a house, buy a house.
It’s like watching a living freak show.
Clara, boating accident patient: She made me from scratch. That’s what she always says. Like when I wanted to go skydiving, you know, ‘don’t jump out of a plane Clara, I made that body from scratch.’ When I sprained my ankle, ‘Be more careful darling, I made that ankle from scratch.’
Irvine, patient: Let me tell you about the Golden Years. There’s got to be more to life than eating pudding and watching CSI. Now, come on, can you give an old man a working Johnson?
Irvine: Let’s stop pretending she’s going to college. She’s pretty, but she’s not too sharp.
Irvine: You’re just a kid, Doc, you won’t understand, but one day you’re gonna wake up and all the big stuff, all the milestones you’ve been looking forward to, graduation, wedding, having kids, your grandkids, it’s all behind you. It’s all over. All you’ve got is a bunch of yesterdays and very few tomorrows.
Billy, patient: She found her footing, in the back of your neck. Find your open window. Everyone has one. A weak spot, undefended, an open window, a key hidden in a fake rock. That’s how I do it.
Billy, patient: ‘You’re not just a good doctor, you’re a great doctor. You are the future of medicine.’ ‘Only you can keep you down.’ And my favorite: ‘No one can tell it’s plastic surgery.’ I think it’s the nose but it could be the boobs. What do you think?
Isaac: If you ever become frightened, instead become inspired.
Wallace’s mother: Bad dreams, bad dreams, go away. Good dreams, good dreams, here to stay.
Hilary: Dad please, the last thing I am is a disappointment. I’m on honor roll. I run the student council. I basically am the school paper. And I tutor kids with reading problems. Okay, I am every parent’s dream come true including yours. I was exploring the bounds of my consciousness with the help of a mushroom. I made a calculated risk going on that roof, falling off, well, that was a low probability of it, even though low probability of events occasionally occurs. And this one did. So yeah, you’re bummed. I miscalculated because it reminds you of your own unfathomed ability. I’m bummed too. Let’s just leave it at that.
Dr. Singer, patient: Oh yes you’re going in there. So what, he got you pregnant. You’re going to go right into that school and show those cheerleaders that you have nothing to be ashamed of. Those little bitches are poisonous.
Dr. Singer: Are you crazy? I’m never going back to those sex-crazed, teenage alcoholics. No way.
Patient’s boyfriend: Does it make me awful to say I was slightly disappointed? I guess I was just sitting out here thinking, ‘Now he’s going to be like the rest of us who teach and direct and do all the things he finds demeaning.’ You know what’s demeaning? Loving a man, taking care of him, doing his shopping, making his meals, making sure his humidifiers are clean. God forbid his humidifiers aren’t clean. What’s demeaning is loving a man who thinks so little of you.
Dr. Baylor: You don’t have wants or needs, you’re an intern. The bottom of the surgical food chain. I am a resident. I’ve been here three years, you’ve been here three days. Do the math. Draw her blood.
Harper Avery: Was it a student? Board member’s wife? No one gives up the Chief of Surgery gig and they don’t ask you to unless it’s for something juicy so who were you slipping it to?
Harper: Being awake for my own surgery, what an opportunity like this to be a student again in a new perspective. It’s what we got into this business for in the first place. Those moments that challenge and terrify, dare us to reach the potential we were meant to reach. Let’s stop the talk, and get into the OR and teach those kids, teach ourselves what it means to be great.
Harper: No! I decide when it’s enough. You think that I am arrogant and overbearing and maybe I am, but I am also you’re only living grandfather and it has become very clear to me today that my time is coming.
Molly, patient’s girlfriend: What? Pick up women? You mean, how do you explain your boobs to the next chick who’s dumb enough to date you?
Cancer patient: It’s like I’m applying to die.
Cancer patient: I would like to end my life through physician’s suicide.
Patient’s daughter: I’m nine and you just spelled sex.
Mrs. Corso: It’s easy to make jokes about him. You didn’t know him before. You don’t know that inside all of that, I’ve always known. He can make me laugh til I can’t breathe. He’s been trying to make you guys laugh all day but you’re all too disgusted to smile or joke with him, make him feel like a person. I brought him here because I thought you could help him, but you’re only making him feel worse. S unless you want to tell me the next step to getting him out of here and home I don’t want to hear anything from you.
Dr. Ben Warren: Now, woman, I am naked and I look good. Now are you going to sit there and lecture me or are you going to let me take you into my bedroom and have my way with you?
Mary, patient: Full of fresh blood, it’s disgusting. It’s like I’m a vampire or something.
Mary: She knows. Girls always know.
Dr. Percy: Nobody named Charlie ever got the girl. Charlie Brown. Charlie Manson.
Dr. Percy: You’re trading sex for surgery. That’s prostitution. Is that the part I’m supposed to get over?
Dr. Percy: I know you of Yang, she gives you the warm and fuzzies with her magical, special, heart skills but those lungs your transplanting belong to a patient of mine and it would mean a lot to turn his death into something meaningful.
Dr. Percy: Can you find her and tell her I loved her? I loved her so much. You tell her I was a catch. I was a hot, hot catch. And she missed out on a great guy. And you tell her I was a brave, even if I turn coward and start crying and asking for my mom in a second. You tell her I died brave, okay?
Dr. Percy: Well, you know what they say about people with big feet.
Dr. Percy: And some doctors enjoy torturing patients because they messed up and don’t know what they’re going to do with the rest of their lives.
Sloane: I don’t want to know where to come back to. If I give him to you guys, it’s still my baby. I need him to be somebody else’s. I mean, my dad got a clean break from me, and look at him now. Don’t I deserve that?
Kristy: Finally getting some junk in this trunk.
Henry: No, I don't blame her. I was proposing for all the wrong reasons. I mean I liked her and all, but what I liked most about her was her PPO.
Henry: You saved my life this morning, and that deserves a toast even if it wasn't a real wedding.
Dr. Fields: That's how you get a woman to tear her own body apart. You promise her a baby.
Henry: I just have to say this. I basically spent the past hour on a date with William myself, and I don't know how much you know about the guy, but this is what I know. Um, he wears driving gloves, yeah. And he doesn't live with his mother, but until recently he lived above her house. And he used the word "shan't", and he wasn't being funny. And he has yet to tell a story about himself in which he is not the hero. And as your husband, I think we can do better.
Dr. Stark: Pediatric surgeons can be heartless wretches. Some would argue that I'm a case in point. But social workers, on the other hand, are bleeding hearts.
Lucy: Because even though you're whole rap is about self-confidence, you're about as self-assured as a chihuahua.
Eli: Inside the hospital you're the man. That's the protocol, but outside I'm the man. I am the man. Me. Now you can call me cro magnon or old fashion, but that's not going to stop me from taking you home to my bed tonight and showing you what kind of man I am. Now how's that? Does that protocol suit you?
Henry: I've been thinking lately, and I think...um...I think I've figured it out...why all of your dates go so bad, so, so bad, laughably bad, and it's not your fault—it's mine because I'm not the guy on them with you.
Henry: If unibrows were my thing, I'd be all over that.
Henry: I really tried to be a gentleman about all this, but now you need to get the hell out. Letting you go was the worst thing I've ever done. It's the most painful thing I've ever done, and I'm a guy who's had 82 surgeries. My threshold for pain is pretty high. You need to get out. I'm not your best bud. I'm not your security blanket. I'm a man who's in love you who waltzed you into the arms of a damn knight on a horse. So, go to Germany and have little spaetzle-eating children. And please, for God's sake, leave me alone.
Grey's Anatomy: Denny Duquette
Capricorn, single, loves to travel and cook.
Good luck with that.
Triple word score, 69 points. Woman, I'm beating the pants off you. Pay attention, what the hell are you doing?
You took a vow of celibacy?
What? You like your men sick and feeble? You don't dig healthy guys?
It's not the kind of thing I'd forget.
I tricked her into marrying me, how smart am I?
For five years I’ve had to live by the choices of the doctors. The guys who cut me open had decided that there wasn’t one choice that was mine. And now, I have this heart that beats, that works. I get to be like everybody else. I get to make my own decisions, have my own life, do whatever the damn hell I choose. That is the good part. So you listen close, what I choose, is you. You’re who I want to wake up with and go to bed with and do everything in between with. I get a choice now. I get to choose. I choose you Izzie Stevens.
Mistakes are painful but they are the only way to find out who you are.
I knew it. You people are trying to turn me into a robot. It’s all a part of your evil plan to take over the hospital.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, way too harsh! Remember we were going to take it easy? That was not easy.
Meredith, you drowned. In Elliott Bay, you remember that?
People tend to freak out.
Oh, okay Mr. I've-been-dead-longer-and-knows-everything.
Oh, I'm not the one who got himself all blown up.
I will kick your ass anytime. I'm the one with the fresh heart.
Alright, but that thing in the tub. What was that?
I do not see women in the bathtub. I wish I saw wo - We know things.
Yeah, you do. It's easier, but you can't. Because George's dad died. Because Izzie lost me. And Cristina - When she was nine, she was in a car accident with her father. And he bled out right in front of her while they waited for an ambulance to arrive. And Alex...
They're barely breathing. This will break them. None of them deserves that. And this, this is the big one, so you pay attention. Do you know what kind of miracle it is that Derek is who he is? Do you know how rare it is that someone like him even exists? He's an optimist. He still believes in true love and soul mates. He's waiting for you. And if you don't come back from this, you will change who he is.
No. Sometimes we'll be in the same place at exactly the same time, and I can almost hear her voice. It's like I'm touching her. I like to believe she knows I'm there. That's all you get. That's it. Moments with the people you love. And they'll move on, and you'll want them to move on, but still, Meredith, that is all you get. Moments.
I don't know. This is your afterlife, not mine.
[voiceover] Heaven. Hell. Limbo. No one really knows where we're going or what's waiting for us when we get there, but the one thing we can say for sure, with absolute certainty, is that there are moments that take us to another place, moments of Heaven on earth, and maybe for now, that's all we need to know.
[voiceover] I believe in heaven. I also believe in hell. I've never seen either, but... I believe they exist. They have to exist... because without a heaven... without a hell... we're all just heading for limbo.
I loved you so much. I loved you so much that when I got to come back for you, I thought... you were my heaven. But maybe... maybe I'm your hell.
I really hope this is heaven.
Izzie, that kiss is worth a thousand words.
I've been lying in this bed for close to a year, and I've had a lot of time to look back on my life. And the things that I remember best - those are the things I wasn't supposed to do and I did them anyway. The thing is, life is too damn short to be following these rules.
Oh, doc, I’d outta kick your ass making me scream like a baby in front of the girl I’m trying to impress. Man, oh geez.
Since when do you get to decide what’s an option in my life and what isn’t? My heart may be on your battery packs but it’s still my heart. It’s my decision. It’s my damn life.
Izzie, would it wrong for me to feel you up right now?
No you don’t! I’m a man! I’m a strong virile horse of a man stuck in the body some weak sick bastard that I don’t know, like or recognize. Now if you knew what that feels like, you would have never convinced me to let a battery run my heart. If you knew what that feels like Izzie, you would have let me go!
I’ve got twenty tubes coming out of my body. One in which coming out of my you-know- what. At some point I’d like to use that you-know-what for something besides peeing into a bag. Like, for instance, peeing into a toilet. It’s just, Izzie gave me medical advice. You’re giving me different advice. It just so happens that yours is the advice I want to here.
Horses have a great judge of character. If you don’t like horses, then that means they don’t like you.
[answering machine message] Dad, Mom, it’s me. I’m calling from Seattle Grace Hospital where the beautiful, talented, incredibly stubborn Dr. Isobel Stevens, she’s just given me a brand new heart and promised to marry me. I know we’ve had our differences and I’m sorry for not being in touch. Believe it or not, I was trying to make everything better. I know you’re angry, and I hope you’ll forgive me. It turns out, sometimes you’ve got to do the wrong thing. Sometimes you have to make a big mistake to figure out how to make things right. Mistakes are painful, but they’re the only way to find out who you really are. I know who I am now. I know what I want. I’ve got the love of my life, a new heart, and I want you guys to get on the next plane out here and meet my girl. Everything’s going to be different now. I promise, from here on out, nothing’s going to be the same. I love you. Bye.
I can’t do anything that would make you unhappy. You know that.
Denny: Do you believe in heaven? Because I thought maybe this was heaven, getting to be here with you. But now, now I’m not so sure. I think this may be hell.
Denny: You broke up with me and I’m still here. Doesn’t that mean something?
Denny: I want you do be happy Izzie, I do. I would leave if I could. You think I want to stay here while you tell me you want another man? I can’t go because you won’t listen to me. I’m here for you.
Denny: There are other things I’d like to do or see but I can’t. I can’t go to heaven or hell or to Asia. I can’t do anything but this, until you wake up and figure it out.
Denny: I loved you so much that when I got to come back for you, I thought you’re my heaven, but maybe I’m your hell.
Good luck with that.
Triple word score, 69 points. Woman, I'm beating the pants off you. Pay attention, what the hell are you doing?
You took a vow of celibacy?
What? You like your men sick and feeble? You don't dig healthy guys?
It's not the kind of thing I'd forget.
I tricked her into marrying me, how smart am I?
For five years I’ve had to live by the choices of the doctors. The guys who cut me open had decided that there wasn’t one choice that was mine. And now, I have this heart that beats, that works. I get to be like everybody else. I get to make my own decisions, have my own life, do whatever the damn hell I choose. That is the good part. So you listen close, what I choose, is you. You’re who I want to wake up with and go to bed with and do everything in between with. I get a choice now. I get to choose. I choose you Izzie Stevens.
Mistakes are painful but they are the only way to find out who you are.
I knew it. You people are trying to turn me into a robot. It’s all a part of your evil plan to take over the hospital.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, way too harsh! Remember we were going to take it easy? That was not easy.
Meredith, you drowned. In Elliott Bay, you remember that?
People tend to freak out.
Oh, okay Mr. I've-been-dead-longer-and-knows-everything.
Oh, I'm not the one who got himself all blown up.
I will kick your ass anytime. I'm the one with the fresh heart.
Alright, but that thing in the tub. What was that?
I do not see women in the bathtub. I wish I saw wo - We know things.
Yeah, you do. It's easier, but you can't. Because George's dad died. Because Izzie lost me. And Cristina - When she was nine, she was in a car accident with her father. And he bled out right in front of her while they waited for an ambulance to arrive. And Alex...
They're barely breathing. This will break them. None of them deserves that. And this, this is the big one, so you pay attention. Do you know what kind of miracle it is that Derek is who he is? Do you know how rare it is that someone like him even exists? He's an optimist. He still believes in true love and soul mates. He's waiting for you. And if you don't come back from this, you will change who he is.
No. Sometimes we'll be in the same place at exactly the same time, and I can almost hear her voice. It's like I'm touching her. I like to believe she knows I'm there. That's all you get. That's it. Moments with the people you love. And they'll move on, and you'll want them to move on, but still, Meredith, that is all you get. Moments.
I don't know. This is your afterlife, not mine.
[voiceover] Heaven. Hell. Limbo. No one really knows where we're going or what's waiting for us when we get there, but the one thing we can say for sure, with absolute certainty, is that there are moments that take us to another place, moments of Heaven on earth, and maybe for now, that's all we need to know.
[voiceover] I believe in heaven. I also believe in hell. I've never seen either, but... I believe they exist. They have to exist... because without a heaven... without a hell... we're all just heading for limbo.
I loved you so much. I loved you so much that when I got to come back for you, I thought... you were my heaven. But maybe... maybe I'm your hell.
I really hope this is heaven.
Izzie, that kiss is worth a thousand words.
I've been lying in this bed for close to a year, and I've had a lot of time to look back on my life. And the things that I remember best - those are the things I wasn't supposed to do and I did them anyway. The thing is, life is too damn short to be following these rules.
Oh, doc, I’d outta kick your ass making me scream like a baby in front of the girl I’m trying to impress. Man, oh geez.
Since when do you get to decide what’s an option in my life and what isn’t? My heart may be on your battery packs but it’s still my heart. It’s my decision. It’s my damn life.
Izzie, would it wrong for me to feel you up right now?
No you don’t! I’m a man! I’m a strong virile horse of a man stuck in the body some weak sick bastard that I don’t know, like or recognize. Now if you knew what that feels like, you would have never convinced me to let a battery run my heart. If you knew what that feels like Izzie, you would have let me go!
I’ve got twenty tubes coming out of my body. One in which coming out of my you-know- what. At some point I’d like to use that you-know-what for something besides peeing into a bag. Like, for instance, peeing into a toilet. It’s just, Izzie gave me medical advice. You’re giving me different advice. It just so happens that yours is the advice I want to here.
Horses have a great judge of character. If you don’t like horses, then that means they don’t like you.
[answering machine message] Dad, Mom, it’s me. I’m calling from Seattle Grace Hospital where the beautiful, talented, incredibly stubborn Dr. Isobel Stevens, she’s just given me a brand new heart and promised to marry me. I know we’ve had our differences and I’m sorry for not being in touch. Believe it or not, I was trying to make everything better. I know you’re angry, and I hope you’ll forgive me. It turns out, sometimes you’ve got to do the wrong thing. Sometimes you have to make a big mistake to figure out how to make things right. Mistakes are painful, but they’re the only way to find out who you really are. I know who I am now. I know what I want. I’ve got the love of my life, a new heart, and I want you guys to get on the next plane out here and meet my girl. Everything’s going to be different now. I promise, from here on out, nothing’s going to be the same. I love you. Bye.
I can’t do anything that would make you unhappy. You know that.
Denny: Do you believe in heaven? Because I thought maybe this was heaven, getting to be here with you. But now, now I’m not so sure. I think this may be hell.
Denny: You broke up with me and I’m still here. Doesn’t that mean something?
Denny: I want you do be happy Izzie, I do. I would leave if I could. You think I want to stay here while you tell me you want another man? I can’t go because you won’t listen to me. I’m here for you.
Denny: There are other things I’d like to do or see but I can’t. I can’t go to heaven or hell or to Asia. I can’t do anything but this, until you wake up and figure it out.
Denny: I loved you so much that when I got to come back for you, I thought you’re my heaven, but maybe I’m your hell.
Grey's Anatomy: Arizona Robbins
Um, No. You asked me who I was. I think that George joining the army is awesome. I am a person who thinks that what George is doing is dangerous, and terrifying, and brave. He's going to serve his country. He's going to risk his life to save the men and women who make it possible for you and I to sleep safely in our beds. I'm a person who thinks that, that is brave. And I am a person who stood in an airplane hangar, and watched them unload my brother's body in a coffin. And, all we got was a flag. My brother died over there because there weren't enough doctors. So, for my money Callie, George O'Malley is a patriot. He's a hero, and I am grateful that he exists. So yeah, the word I use is awesome. That's who I am.
Most people think that I was named for the state. It’s not true. I was named for the battleship. The U.S.S. Arizona. My grandfather was serving on the Arizona when the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor and he saved nineteen men before he drowned. Pretty much everything my father did his whole life was about honoring that sacrifice. I was raised to be a good man in the storm, raised to love my country, love my family, protect the things I love. When my father, Col. Daniel Robbins of the United States Marine Corps heard that I was a lesbian, he only had one question that I was prepared for: ‘How fast can you get the hell out of my house?’ But instead, it was, ‘Are you still who I raised you to be?’ My father believes in country the way you believe in God. My father is not a man who bends but he bends for me because I’m his daughter. I’m a good man in a storm. I love your daughter and I protect the things I love. Not that I need to. She doesn’t need it. She’s strong and caring and honorable and she’s who you raised her to be.
I... I never had boyfriends. Ever. I had a poster on my wall of Cindy Crawford, and it wasn't just looking at her mole. It wasn't news to my mom when I brought somebody home named Joanne. But you... you dated men your whole life, you loved men. You even married one! You're talking about 30 years of relationship, you know, he's been consistent for 30 years. And all of a sudden you're a whole new girl. So, cut him some slack. Sit down and have a conversation. Give him room to be a little shocked.
Oh no, because you slept with my girlfriend and I find that when I look at you, I want to hit you with a brick.
Jealousy is a green eyed monster and if you ask anyone of my kids, they’ll tell you there is no reasoning with a monster. Dude, run away before I find me a brick. As my friend, don’t judge me for that.
Mark is like candy. Eat it and forget about it. This might be the best idea I’ve ever had.
I told her he was a candy bar.
Until you can tell him he’s awake, it won’t matter. All they’ll hear is white noise and see your mouth moving.
A party in your panties.
This is not general surgery in miniature. These are the tiny humans, these are children. They believe in magic, they play pretend. There is fairy dust in their IV bags. They hope and they make wishes. And that makes them more resilient than adults. They recover faster, survive worse, they believe. In Peds we have miracles and magic. In Peds, anything is possible.
Birthdays are just days like any other days. I don’t like them, don’t celebrate them. No big deal. 25 million dollars, that’s a big deal.
Doing a tips on a kid who needs a new liver, that’s like putting a band-aid on a bullet wound.
I wish you could get organs delivered instead of going to pick them up. I hate flying. I always feel closer to death on an airplane than in the OR. Don’t you?
Children are resilient. And in all likelihood you’re going to open up this girl’s chest and fix something simple. And then you’re going to hand her back the rest of her life. I’m telling you Bailey, you’re gonna want to be there for that.
That it’s more than just cutting. Peds is more than just cutting. And what you did today was heroic. And you know it.
You know they teach us in med school how not to care so much. We drape the patients so we don’t see their faces. We do a thousand different things to care a little less. You care like crazy and I love that. And I’ll keep loving that even if you decide to lie to your family.
Chief? Chief. I’m going to cry and I just want you to know that I know it’s going to happen. I just want you to ignore it. I’m not cry because I’m upset. It’s just what happens when I get mad at [people of authority. I’m mad at you and I’m crying because you’re the boss, my boss, which brings up my issues of authority with my dad who you kind of remind me of, not that you’re old, but command respect. People respect you, and I know I do, and I know Dr. Bailey does, which is why I’m mad. Because it’s wrong sir, it’s wrong and mean to use a robot to lure Dr. Bailey back into general surgery ‘cause I don’t have a robot. All I have are little kids and they’re not as fun as a robot and they’re not shiny and new and silver and they don’t have things coming out of their belly buttons but I will fight you. And I will win, sir. Because I have something that you don’t have. I have joy, sir!
The kids you can save almost make up for the ones you can’t.
You know, it’s not a good idea to piss off your attending. I like kids, and I like their parents and I like to see them smile. So I like going to get them pudding and playing games with them because it makes reattaching their arm way more fun. I don’t like being used. And I don’t like being lied to even less.
You left him alone. You don’t get to feel anything, because he’s feeling everything. His every nerve is exposed and raw and we have to make him feel worse before we can make him feel better. So if you’re having feelings, then you need to shut them down. You need shut them down and talk to him about his future and remind him that he has one past all of this pain. And if you can’t do that, if you can’t do your job, then you find someone who can and you send them to me.
He makes scratching look sexy.
You don’t think Peds is hardcore? Because you can say that to my face Avery.
There’s a difference between advocating for tiny humans and berating terrified parents. You’re good with kids I can see that. You’ve got great hands and great instincts, we already knew that. And you’re as good as anyone I’ve seen when it comes to advocating for your patients, but until you’ve been a parent, until you’ve stayed up nights with a screaming infant, or dealt day in and day out with a terrorist toddler, or raised a lying teenager, you don’t get to judge parents. You have to advocate for the kids. You don’t get to berate terrified parents. You clear on that?
I like to fix things, people. I like to fix people. You’re staring and you’re sad and I think you need friends that aren’t Owen. That’s where I come in with the fixing. You’re going to be friends with me.I’m an awesome friend.
It’s really bad form to cancel plans with new friends, you know that right?
Are you one of those fake lesbians just having a vacation in lesbian land?
Everyone, we’re sealing the floor. I don’t know why and it doesn’t matter why, but no one goes in or out past the double doors. You check on your own patients then you come back and check to see if there are any others in the cube. We don’t have a lot of hands on deck. And people, do not alarm the makers of the tiny humans. They will eat you alive.
Look, it's not that I don't like Mark, it's just that he's Mark. What you see is what you get. Besides, you like him. What do I care that his abs are where his soul should be.
I am so deeply, deeply, deeply sorry for hurting you so much. I am so sorry because I'm so in love with you, and I will spend the rest of my life telling you that. I'll apologize to you every day if that's what you need, but, please, please don't walk away again. I came across the world to be with you. I love you. Please.
Body block him, Karev. Don't let him near that leg.
It's good that she's mad. It means she cares, right?
I'm a stuck up self-righteous bitch.
I bail. Ok? When things get hard, I walk away.
Shut up. Just shut up. You don't get to tell me that we're not together. We are together. Because I love you and you love me, and none of the rest of it matters. We are together. And if you ever sleep with anyone else again, man or woman, I will kick the crap out of you. Now you sit your ass back down there because that's my baby in there. I don't want anything happening to my baby.
And Mark, you know, is human and clearly has good genes because he's both pretty and smart.
OK, can we just be honest about the fact that is some kind of "bi" dream come true? I mean you get the woman that you love and the guy best friend who's also a great lay and then you get a baby. I mean you get it all. Me—this is not my dream. My dream does not look like this.
I never picked him, and I don't hate him, but I don't want a life with him. And yet that's somehow what I got.
I don't get excited by Mark. I'm not delighted by Mark.
We have a relationship, Mark. Part of that doesn't include you.
It's not all hugging and the Special Olympics.
I mean he gets most of you. The straight you, the Catholic you, the girl who loves baby showers. I just get, you know, the gay you, which is really only about twenty minutes a night...
Someone threw out the gift list, and now we don't know who got what, and people are going to think of us as the type of people who write vague and impersonal thank you notes.
You're not the Callie whisperer. And I'm not a monster for finding baby showers annoying. Everyone woman who's ever had a pregnant friend hates them. It's like a wedding—the bridesmaids always want to strangle the bride. It's practically a rule. The only one who's not normal here is you for acting like you're enjoying this.
I asked her to marry me, and a truck came out of nowhere.
I feel like your wife. I feel like our baby's mom.
She's one pound, one ounce of strong.
She can't open her eyes yet, but I can tell she's looking for you.
It's a traumatic brain injury. It's not boot camp.
Most people think that I was named for the state. It’s not true. I was named for the battleship. The U.S.S. Arizona. My grandfather was serving on the Arizona when the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor and he saved nineteen men before he drowned. Pretty much everything my father did his whole life was about honoring that sacrifice. I was raised to be a good man in the storm, raised to love my country, love my family, protect the things I love. When my father, Col. Daniel Robbins of the United States Marine Corps heard that I was a lesbian, he only had one question that I was prepared for: ‘How fast can you get the hell out of my house?’ But instead, it was, ‘Are you still who I raised you to be?’ My father believes in country the way you believe in God. My father is not a man who bends but he bends for me because I’m his daughter. I’m a good man in a storm. I love your daughter and I protect the things I love. Not that I need to. She doesn’t need it. She’s strong and caring and honorable and she’s who you raised her to be.
I... I never had boyfriends. Ever. I had a poster on my wall of Cindy Crawford, and it wasn't just looking at her mole. It wasn't news to my mom when I brought somebody home named Joanne. But you... you dated men your whole life, you loved men. You even married one! You're talking about 30 years of relationship, you know, he's been consistent for 30 years. And all of a sudden you're a whole new girl. So, cut him some slack. Sit down and have a conversation. Give him room to be a little shocked.
Oh no, because you slept with my girlfriend and I find that when I look at you, I want to hit you with a brick.
Jealousy is a green eyed monster and if you ask anyone of my kids, they’ll tell you there is no reasoning with a monster. Dude, run away before I find me a brick. As my friend, don’t judge me for that.
Mark is like candy. Eat it and forget about it. This might be the best idea I’ve ever had.
I told her he was a candy bar.
Until you can tell him he’s awake, it won’t matter. All they’ll hear is white noise and see your mouth moving.
A party in your panties.
This is not general surgery in miniature. These are the tiny humans, these are children. They believe in magic, they play pretend. There is fairy dust in their IV bags. They hope and they make wishes. And that makes them more resilient than adults. They recover faster, survive worse, they believe. In Peds we have miracles and magic. In Peds, anything is possible.
Birthdays are just days like any other days. I don’t like them, don’t celebrate them. No big deal. 25 million dollars, that’s a big deal.
Doing a tips on a kid who needs a new liver, that’s like putting a band-aid on a bullet wound.
I wish you could get organs delivered instead of going to pick them up. I hate flying. I always feel closer to death on an airplane than in the OR. Don’t you?
Children are resilient. And in all likelihood you’re going to open up this girl’s chest and fix something simple. And then you’re going to hand her back the rest of her life. I’m telling you Bailey, you’re gonna want to be there for that.
That it’s more than just cutting. Peds is more than just cutting. And what you did today was heroic. And you know it.
You know they teach us in med school how not to care so much. We drape the patients so we don’t see their faces. We do a thousand different things to care a little less. You care like crazy and I love that. And I’ll keep loving that even if you decide to lie to your family.
Chief? Chief. I’m going to cry and I just want you to know that I know it’s going to happen. I just want you to ignore it. I’m not cry because I’m upset. It’s just what happens when I get mad at [people of authority. I’m mad at you and I’m crying because you’re the boss, my boss, which brings up my issues of authority with my dad who you kind of remind me of, not that you’re old, but command respect. People respect you, and I know I do, and I know Dr. Bailey does, which is why I’m mad. Because it’s wrong sir, it’s wrong and mean to use a robot to lure Dr. Bailey back into general surgery ‘cause I don’t have a robot. All I have are little kids and they’re not as fun as a robot and they’re not shiny and new and silver and they don’t have things coming out of their belly buttons but I will fight you. And I will win, sir. Because I have something that you don’t have. I have joy, sir!
The kids you can save almost make up for the ones you can’t.
You know, it’s not a good idea to piss off your attending. I like kids, and I like their parents and I like to see them smile. So I like going to get them pudding and playing games with them because it makes reattaching their arm way more fun. I don’t like being used. And I don’t like being lied to even less.
You left him alone. You don’t get to feel anything, because he’s feeling everything. His every nerve is exposed and raw and we have to make him feel worse before we can make him feel better. So if you’re having feelings, then you need to shut them down. You need shut them down and talk to him about his future and remind him that he has one past all of this pain. And if you can’t do that, if you can’t do your job, then you find someone who can and you send them to me.
He makes scratching look sexy.
You don’t think Peds is hardcore? Because you can say that to my face Avery.
There’s a difference between advocating for tiny humans and berating terrified parents. You’re good with kids I can see that. You’ve got great hands and great instincts, we already knew that. And you’re as good as anyone I’ve seen when it comes to advocating for your patients, but until you’ve been a parent, until you’ve stayed up nights with a screaming infant, or dealt day in and day out with a terrorist toddler, or raised a lying teenager, you don’t get to judge parents. You have to advocate for the kids. You don’t get to berate terrified parents. You clear on that?
I like to fix things, people. I like to fix people. You’re staring and you’re sad and I think you need friends that aren’t Owen. That’s where I come in with the fixing. You’re going to be friends with me.I’m an awesome friend.
It’s really bad form to cancel plans with new friends, you know that right?
Are you one of those fake lesbians just having a vacation in lesbian land?
Everyone, we’re sealing the floor. I don’t know why and it doesn’t matter why, but no one goes in or out past the double doors. You check on your own patients then you come back and check to see if there are any others in the cube. We don’t have a lot of hands on deck. And people, do not alarm the makers of the tiny humans. They will eat you alive.
Look, it's not that I don't like Mark, it's just that he's Mark. What you see is what you get. Besides, you like him. What do I care that his abs are where his soul should be.
I am so deeply, deeply, deeply sorry for hurting you so much. I am so sorry because I'm so in love with you, and I will spend the rest of my life telling you that. I'll apologize to you every day if that's what you need, but, please, please don't walk away again. I came across the world to be with you. I love you. Please.
Body block him, Karev. Don't let him near that leg.
It's good that she's mad. It means she cares, right?
I'm a stuck up self-righteous bitch.
I bail. Ok? When things get hard, I walk away.
Shut up. Just shut up. You don't get to tell me that we're not together. We are together. Because I love you and you love me, and none of the rest of it matters. We are together. And if you ever sleep with anyone else again, man or woman, I will kick the crap out of you. Now you sit your ass back down there because that's my baby in there. I don't want anything happening to my baby.
And Mark, you know, is human and clearly has good genes because he's both pretty and smart.
OK, can we just be honest about the fact that is some kind of "bi" dream come true? I mean you get the woman that you love and the guy best friend who's also a great lay and then you get a baby. I mean you get it all. Me—this is not my dream. My dream does not look like this.
I never picked him, and I don't hate him, but I don't want a life with him. And yet that's somehow what I got.
I don't get excited by Mark. I'm not delighted by Mark.
We have a relationship, Mark. Part of that doesn't include you.
It's not all hugging and the Special Olympics.
I mean he gets most of you. The straight you, the Catholic you, the girl who loves baby showers. I just get, you know, the gay you, which is really only about twenty minutes a night...
Someone threw out the gift list, and now we don't know who got what, and people are going to think of us as the type of people who write vague and impersonal thank you notes.
You're not the Callie whisperer. And I'm not a monster for finding baby showers annoying. Everyone woman who's ever had a pregnant friend hates them. It's like a wedding—the bridesmaids always want to strangle the bride. It's practically a rule. The only one who's not normal here is you for acting like you're enjoying this.
I asked her to marry me, and a truck came out of nowhere.
I feel like your wife. I feel like our baby's mom.
She's one pound, one ounce of strong.
She can't open her eyes yet, but I can tell she's looking for you.
It's a traumatic brain injury. It's not boot camp.
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