Freaky Friday

Tess: Privacy is a privilege.

Chinese Fortune Cookie Horoscope:
A journey soon begins, its prize reflected in another's eyes. When what you see is what you lack, then selfless love will change you back.

Anna (as Tess): I don't believe in any contact with the opposite sex. At all.

Anna (as Tess): I Look like Stevie Nicks!
Tess (as Anna): Who's he?

Tess (as Anna): We're doing a role-switching activity.
Grandpa: If I have to do this with Harry, does that mean I need to wear a thong? Harry: Ooooh! Earthquake! Help me!

Anna (as Tess): You pierced your navel?!
Tess (as Anna): Oh, yeah, forgot to tell you about that...sorry
Tess (as Anna): When did you do this?
Anna (as Tess): At Maddie's cousin's sweet 16.
Anna (as Tess): Well when you get your body back, it's grounded!

Anna (as Tess): It's easy to be you I'll just suck the fun out of everything!
Tess (as Anna): I do not suck the fun out of everything!
Anna (as Tess): Fun-Sucker!

Anna (as Tess): I'm old!
Tess (as Anna): I beg your pardon!
Anna (as Tess): Oh, I'm like the Cryptkeeper!

Anna (as Tess): Like cooking: I mean, have you never heard of takeout? And cleaning: let's don't and say we did. Quality time with your kids: You know what? Quit bugging 'em. Leave 'em alone. They like it!

Tess (as Anna): She is dead, worse than dead. She will spend the next year in a phoneless, dateless, Amish existence!

Peg: Aren't you like the maid of horror or something?

Anna: You couldn't last one day in my high school.
Tess: Actually I could, and I would do it without getting a detention.

Anna: You're ruining my life!

Pei-Pei: Sexy new look for you, Mrs. Coleman! You look hot!

Peg: Mr. Dude, you rock!