90210: Naomi Clark

Now that I know who you are it's probably gonna sting a lot harder when I never talk to you again

The harder the slap, the harder they rub back.

It was a fabulous party. I just expect to see you there, with all your morals and everything.

Yes, George, I was at the gynecologist, who told me to remind you to keep your vagina clean.

Everyone knows McLovin. No one has any clue that Topeka is the capital of Kansas.

Annie is a whore who went out with my boyfriend when I asked her not to.

I'm gonna get us some fruity, crappy, non alcoholic drinks... woohoo!

If Perez Hilton has taught us anything, it's that you can't hide a baby bump forever.

If I sleep on wet hair, it's a crap fiesta in the morning.

Fortunately for you, I speak fluent Sidekick.

Enjoy my sloppy seconds!

There are a lot of other fish in the sea. Equally cute fish.

If I were going to the island of lesbos, you'd be my pick.

Super hot gyno; when he talks, I listen!

I may be a lot of things. But I am not a cheating skank.

I'm very possessive when it comes to balls.

Am I the only one that thought [Monica Lewinsky] had real talent as a bag designer?

If I feel like throwing a party at my house, I'm gonna throw a party at my house.

Well you sounds like a spoiled bitch. And just so we're clear, you're completely disinvited to my birthday party!

Is that code for "sleeping with his girlfriend"?

My family is so fake. I mean, my sister's being Photoshopped into the Christmas card from Paris. My dad is kissing my mom while having an affair.

Because school let out. It's been 9 hours since I said "I love you" and "bye." I was standing here in the doorway, remember? You were laying in bed, being pathetic.

No! No, I won't give you a break. Okay? I'm your friend and I may come off as annoying or whatever you think I am, but I care about you, and I'm worried about you.

We've only been broken up for a few days and you already have a baby with someone else?

There are a lot of other fish in the sea. Equally cute fish.

I don't speak skank. Maybe I could find an interpreter.

I am terrible at tests. But, I'm an excellent dater.

Since I'm not going to CU, I figure I'll end up working at a fast food joint. So might as well dress the part, right?

CU is just like being on those East Coast campuses. Except the weather is great, and the people are good looking.

I love the feeling of being on the ocean. It totally turns me on.

I can't be distracted by rock-hard abs and thighs that have driven countries to war.

I am here to rescue your little news broadcast thingy... I'll give people sex advice!

Picture lots of cleavage, excellent ass.

What Silver needs are friends she can rely on, and clearly that's not you.

Watching that movie on industrial meat production just gave me a craving for Kobe sliders.

We can totally go topless in St. Bart's... I've been tanning my ta-tas in anticipation.

I saw him kissing that barefoot surfer chick. Apparently, he likes the smell of BO.

I lost the person I love most in this world. Now, all I have left is a horse.

Did you see that shirt Ivy is wearing? I wouldn't use that shirt as a rag to scrub my own bathtub

Are you asking me if you should get implants? Because I thinks that's a great idea... big no no.

Every girl must have the perfect little sequent dress. The LSD is the most important element to a girl's wardrobe because boys like shiny things. They're kind of like babies in that regard.

True, Liam is totally a trout.

I don't understand why he's so stiff around me. Outside the bedroom, inside, like I said, he's plenty stiff.

It's not boring. Deck panels are... rad.

What's complicated about it? He's a drug dealer.

Next time, just ask, "Am I in or out because I'm not popping the pill every day just to get rids of zits and PMS."

It's the fact that you don't have to deal with birthdays. Let's face it, birthdays suck unless they're mine.

You don't want me to tell him what a big tramp you were.

How am I supposed to build an outfit around fluorescent orange?

I am the perverter. I perverted justice.

Liam is a loser. And I'm fantastic and I'm gonna meet someone a thousand times better.

When is Obama gonna outlaw gym class? Guantanamo Bay? That's great. But phys ed? Seriously.

Jen is hardly human. Who would have thought she could reproduce?

Oh my god. Stop kissing or I'm gonna take a picture and send it to Perez.

Jen was pretty much slutting it up with any rich buy that looked in her direction.