Grey's Anatomy: George O'Malley

I'm George. Uh, O'Malley, uh... We met at the mixer, and you were the girl with the black dress with a slit up the side and the strappy sandals. Right. Now you think I'm gay.

Maybe I should have gone into geriatrics. No one minds when you kill an old person.

This shift is a marathon, not a sprint. Eat.

The Nazi's a resident. I have attendings hating me.

I thought the Nazi would be a man.

I mean are we supposed to learning something because I don't feel like I'm learning anything.

Do you know what the code team does? Saves lives. I should shock a heart and see if someone lives another day.

Why are you being modest? Modest looks weird on you.

Superheroes look like anyone, like you and me. Maybe they’re not someone who people necessarily notice as extraordinary. Maybe in their daily life they get walked on. But then, there’s a moment they get hit by a cosmic ray or bitten by a radioactive spider and then suddenly something that has been in them all this time lying dormant come raging out.

I would have been a really good postal worker. I’m dependable. You know, my parents tell every person they meet that their son is a surgeon. Like it's this big accomplishment. Like I’m a superhero or something. If they could see me now.

I'm going to have to dodge Burke for the rest of my career. He could kill me and make it look like an accident.

You underestimate me. I'm not a baby, I'm your colleague. You don't have to manipulate me. If you want something all you have to do is ask.

You're parading through the bathroom in your underwear, when I'm naked in the shower.

I am a man! I don't buy girl products. I don't want you walking in while I'm in the shower. And I don't wanna see you in your underwear!

When a parent dies it doesn’t make any sense, so you make a lot of really terrible decisions that you’re going to have to live with for a long time.

Men don't buy tampons! I am not your sister!

The amount of flesh exposed is not the point. You have to do something, it's your house.

No. I'm too masculine to be emasculated.

The heart's a tough muscle; it can take a squeeze or two.

You and Izzie will give birth to very tall, blond people - kind of like Barbies.

How does a pompous, cocky jackass like you always have women all over him?

We're cutting out half the girl's brain, and it's going to work. It's outrageous. Almost makes it kinda hard to hate him.

It's not her fault, it's Shepherd's. He's an attending he should know better. He's taking advantage of her.

I'm an investigative sponge.

You don't understand. Me, gonads. You, ovaries.

Oh, hi, Chief. No, not much going on, well, other than your interim chief making out with my friend in the stairwell, but hey... sponge duty sucks.

Yes. No. Damn it. I'm a bad sponge. A leaky sponge. I'm gonna leak all the wrong secrets. I'm a bad liar. I can't even lie about talking to myself. You look nice today.

More like McMarried.

I married you and I haven’t talked to my best friend in weeks. Meanwhile, you lied to me about where we live and why. You lied to me about your background. You lied to me about your family! And still I’m the dog that gets whacked on the nose with the newspaper all the time! When is this going to stop!?

Wow, when I’m wrong about someone I’m really wrong about someone.

Correction, George got some syphilis.

Eight million dollars does not like to have juice spilled on it.

I just dropped $8.7 million dollars on the floor. I shouldn’t be able to drop $8.7 million dollars on the floor.

Do you know why I picked you to be my dad’s intern? Because you are a robot. You are a freaking robot in a white coat who never makes a mistake, and most of the time I appreciate that. Most of the time I feel like I have something to learn from you, but right now, right now, I just need you to try and be a human being.

She probably could've picked a better metaphor.

Why do we hump on every dead or dying patient that comes through those doors? So we can tell their family that we did everything we could.

We're not in Kansas anymore.

We have to do something. Meredith has become like an exhibit like... hey... like a zoo animal... like that rare panda that everyone stares at.

Meredith is anything but cold. She smiles not that often, but when she does, you know, because she’s been going through a lot, it’s like you feel warm. She’s kind. I mean, she can be a little selfish. She’s flawed, but she’s kind. She cares about people and she cares about her patients. I think she’s going to be a brilliant surgeon. You know around her she’s known to be the one to beat. So I guess she has that in common with her mom. I think the rest of that she has in common with you.

Today I committed bird murder, and I was forced to touch my dad's ass. I get extra points for showing up at all.

Really? Being southern makes you stupid?

I'm in hell.

I'm in the woods with shotguns and liquor. It's like Deliverance out here.

No matter how hard you beg me, I am not sleeping with you.

She's hardcore. She was ice in her veins. She does what she has to to get through.

So, how do you break a guy's penis?

Sleeping with me is really this awful for you?

I have the best quint. Lucy. She just smiled at me.

I'm saying, there are five babies here, and clearly mine is the advanced one.

Babies just like me.

You weren't officially his girlfriend.

It is kind of the point. You don't see me getting all emotional over people I'm not dating.

You're not gonna have a nervous breakdown and kill yourself are you?

It’s easy to get nervous on a date. It’s especially hard if you’re out of practice. You just gotta be mellow and relax.

I can't hear you when his hand is on your boob.

You're not giving me a rectal. Do not ask me to cough.

Clean as a whistle... And a mathlete.

Okay, yeah. You could sue us, or you could consider the possibility of just shutting the hell up.

I need you to get over yourself. I need you to start liking my wife. I need you to like her because sometimes I don’t and I need you to talk me back into it. You say you’re my friend, that’s the job. I need to vent and I need it to be okay! And I need to vent with alcohol.

Well you can't. I'm her doctor, she is my patient, and this is a hospital, which is the kind of place where people could generally use a little peace and quiet. So, no. Right now, you can't see her. And I am not saying this because you threatened to sue Dr. Bailey, who spent the last several hours saving your daughter's life, saving your wife's life. I am saying this because she is my patient and she is the recovery wing of this hospital trying to recover, and visiting hours are over. So, good night. And, Merry Christmas.

Sir, you asked me before if I had a daughter. I don’t but I have a family. I actually have a couple families. The thing about families is you don’t necessarily like what they do, their choices and decisions, but you stick by them.

My throat, it's like, wicked sore, yo. Plus, I got all these sick break outs, right?

I was doing mono, the whole fever and the glands thing. The acne, was just part of the teenager thing.

That doesn’t end the pain. I mean, if it’s that painful to start with, even if you cut it off, there’s always going to be that phantom pain.

'Hey Olivia. How ya doing? By the way I got the syph. How about you?'

She let him touch her boobs!

Apparently God hates me.

You think someone is your friend, you know, you think the very least he could do is respect your privacy!

Cristina gets sex and perks.

Sorry, can't help you! Fair hours! Fair wages! Fair hours! Fair... no offense.

Dr. Burke’s orders trump any personal issues I might have.

Dr. Bailey, I'm surprised at you. I really thought - this is not how I thought you would do this. I truly... I expected more. You're Dr. Bailey. You don't hide from a fight, you don't give up, you strive for greatness. You, Dr. Bailey... you are a doer. I know your husband's not here, and I know- there are a lot of things going on here that we have no control over. But this... this, we can do.

I think I’m choking back some McVomit.

Something needs to be done about your taste.

I know I’m not a world renowned surgeon and I know I’m not a lot of things you’ve gone for in the past, I know. But I would never leave you, I would never hurt you, and I will never stop loving you.

[voiceover] Okay, so sometimes, even the best of us make rash decisions - bad decisions. Decisions we pretty much know we're gonna regret the moment, the minute - especially the morning after. Maybe not "regret" regret because at least, you know, we put ourselves out there, but still, something inside us decides to do a crazy thing. A thing we know will probably turn around and bite us in the ass. Yet, we do it anyway. What I'm saying is, we reap what we sow. What comes around goes around. It's karma and any way you slice it, karma sucks.

[voiceover] One way or another our karma will lead us to face ourselves. We can look our karma in the eye or we can wait for it to sneak up on us from behind. One way or another our karma will always find us. And the truth is, as surgeons we have more chances than most to set the balance in our favor. No matter how hard we try, we can't escape our karma. It follows us home. I guess we can't really complain about karma. It's not unfair. It's not unexpected. It just evens the score. And even when we're about to do something we know will probably tempt karma to bite us in the ass well, it goes without saying, we do it anyway.

Burke said to do whatever I have to do and I am going to do whatever.

You show no weakness, you make it to the top.

We are now the people that the people we want to be with avoid.

If they don’t want us alarmed, then why do they mark the button alarm?

I’m going to buy a tee shirt that says “Stop asking me about Meredith!!” And I’m going to wear it every day until people stop asking me about Meredith.

You wanna know something? I knew. I knew you didn't feel that way about me, even during... when we were in bed I knew. I knew and I still let it happen, because, um... well, I figured one night with you was better than never. So, will you just stop saying that you're sorry? 'Cause you didn't know any better, but I did. And I still let it happen. I'm sorry.

What he's saying is that we're very very hopeful that you speak teenage girl.

It’s Vegas. What happens in that room stays in that room.

Whatever. I don’t chew up his clothes. I don’t pee in his bed. I don’t try to mount him from behind.

It’s like we’re on a train that’s going 200 miles per hour and it would so nice to just get off. Stay on the platform for a minute.

I’m not going to break. I’m not going to get freaked out and I’m not going to break. It’s not because I don’t care, but I do care what you think about me. I do. Care. I just can’t tell you what you want to hear, which seems to be a theme in my life right now. Just because you can’t say something doesn’t mean it doesn’t long to, you can long to very much. You can be with a person and be happy with them and not love them, or you can love someone and not want to be with them. You don’t need to love someone to want them. Oh it’s frustrating when your brain tells you what you want, and what you actually want, don’t match up. It’s exhausting and it’s complicated. But that’s life, and life... sucks.

That's Alex's apple, how rude.

[voiceover] Like I was saying, payback’s a bitch.

I believe in karma. Good people deserve good things. At least that’s the way I thought the universe worked.

You are dark and twisty inside Meredith and now Izzie is dark and twisty inside.

Okay, I’m jealous. I have a right to be jealous because I don’t want other guys touching your panties!

They are freaking corpses to us!

McDreamy was doing the McNasty with McHottie? That McBastard!

You know he let her decanulate a heart this morning?

I-I don't know how to exist in a world where my dad doesn't.

It was the blood that was toxic; not you!

People die.

You don't even have a penis! How am I the fish?

You wanna have a baby. There's a guy with an ax in his head.

I’m angry. What’s wrong with having a lot of sex if it makes me feel better?

Er, rule number three. If you're sleeping, do not wake you unless the patient is actually dying.

Do you remember when he wallpapered the hospital with pictures of you in your underwear?

Looks like Santa threw up in here.

I think your taking some kind of risks. I think you’ll find yourself in a hole in some guy’s basement being ordered to put some lotion on the skin or else you’ll get the hose again. So you’re not over Derek. You want to be but you’re not. You’re out to find some replacements, some temporary way to feel better but it’s not working. It’s not going to work because future, meaningless one night stands and problematic penises is not what you want. You want better, and you deserve better. And not every guy’s a nightmare.

Tomorrow I'm gonna buy a t-shirt that says, "Stop asking me about Meredith," and I'm gonna wear it everyday until people stop asking me about Meredith.

Mind... She had expectations, women have expectations and you didn’t meet them. Hey I live with these women and every time you guys don’t meet their expectations I have to hear about it. So it is my business.

If I say it back right now, you know I’m just saying it because you said it to me. When I say ‘I love you’ I want to mean it because, you just have to give me some time to mean it.

I like you; I just don’t like you enough.

You don't get to choose. I know you've been going through a bad time. I know you miss Shepard. And I know that your life has, admittedly, been pretty unpleasant these days. You get points for breathing in and out. You get to be a little selfish. But you don't get to choose a dog over me... I'm George. I sleep down the hall from you. I buy your tampons. I have held your hand, every time you asked. I've earned the right to be seen. To be respected. To not have you think of me, as less than a dog that you got at the pound. So, I'm not moving out. Whether you like it or not, I'm staying.

A dog is not a replacement for a human being.

You shot Dad in the ass! Are you happy now!?

Today I committed bird murder and I was forced to touch my dad's ass. I get extra points for showing up at all.

No matter how hard you beg, I am not doing you.

My life was saved by a pigeon.

In high school, I was secretary and treasurer of the Dungeons and Dragons club. I was also a mathlete. And I won the blue ribbon in biology club, best fetal pig dissection. Let me tell you, that had the girls knocking down my door. You just have to get through high school because high school sucks for anyone who's the least bit different. But then there's college and out in the real world you will find where you fit in.

A man does not give an ultimatum and then back down.

I gave an ultimatum. I threw down the gauntlet. I drew my line in the sand.

If she wakes up after surgery because my lie helped to save her life, I’m okay with that Dr. Bailey.

Do you know? Did you realize how rarely doctors say thank you and please to nurses? How few surgeons even know the names of them?

The fact that we're jealous because they might blow up the guy is not a reflection on our character. It's about feeling useless.

I believe that if you were dead, the world would be a better place.

I’m just saying there’s a reason for this. You lived. We both did. Carpe diem, man. Seize the day.

I don’t get you people.

Dad, stop acting like you’re dying. You’re not dying.

You people, you’re supposed to be my friends, my closest friends. Callie, she’s the most important part of my life now. And if you want to drive her away, you’re masters at it, you’ll do it. But if she’s gone, I’m gone. She’s my wife. Calliophe Iphegia Torres is my wife.

Maybe you can tell him that he dodged a bullet. I mean, marriage is… once you’re in, you’re in. Burke is smart, he didn’t make a mistake. A mistake that, you know, is hard to take back, even if you wanted to take back you can’t. So you can tell him that.

Mr. Chandly. I don’t have kids so I don’t know what it’s like to lose a child but I do know what it’s like to lose a parent. Your daughter loved you. I saw her this morning. She was fighting for you. She was fighting for your life. You’re her dad. You’re her dad; she didn’t want to leave you. I know that, I also know that she would want you to have her heart. I would of given my dad my heart if I could. If I could have saved him, I would have given him my heart.

Kids bounce back more quickly than adults.

I believe that if you were dead, the world would be a better place.

When you hear hoof beats think horses not zebras, right Dr. Bailey.

So you made a mistake and slept with alex. No one has made more mistakes, or slept with more inappropriate women, or been more publicly humiliated than me. Let me be an inspiration. I am the Chief’s intern. I am the man at the right hand of the man. That would be me.

He punched someone named Harrison. Apparently there was a graham cracker involved.

Dr. Bailey and I are in love. I will be heading back to Vegas with her as soon as my divorce with Dr. Torres is final.

You know, whenever anyone says something really funny and I laugh I always look around to see if you think it's funny too. Even when you are not there, I look around.

I can do this. I’m not married and cheating on my wife with my best friend. Everything is just as it should be.

Us airplane guys, I think we just like to know how things work.

If you really have feelings for someone, if you really love them, then you talk to them, right?

A whipple is for pancreatic cancer. Were you planning on going in through the mouth?

Dependably selfless.

Is it wrong to have hatred in your heart?