Sunday, December 20, 2009

American Dreams: Season Two

The smart ones make lousy military wives. - Diane

Is the doctor going to take blood, because that counts as a shot. - Will

My mother always said only tramps and whores where red. - Diane

Why is it he can go out with every coed and you can't date 100 guys? - Roxanne

Sometimes you have to get behind the wheel. Lots of guys like a girl that knows how to steer. - Roxanne

Drew: I would have introduced you except I couldn't remember her name.
Meg: Oh, that makes me feel better because I thought you couldn't remember mine.

Nobody's ever believed in me as much as you have. I mean it. - Lenny

For a very smart girl you lack some common sense. - Helen

Just tell me what city you're in, and I'm on the greyhound. - Roxanne

You gotta learn, you gotta pick and choose your battles. - Henry

You're just some girl who went all the way with some guy going on his first tour. - Meg

Roxanne: Remember when he was three and we made him eat those worms?
Meg: You made him. I just put them in the cupcakes.

I found out what they mean when they say "leave no man behind," because we don't. When you go out into battle, everyone on your team is looking out for each other. And that's how you make it. Everyone is behind you, Will. - J.J.

One for my baby and one for the road. Sinatra. - Pete

If someone is putting a noose around your neck and you're trying to take it off. That's not violence. - Sam

Meg: Is that legal?
Roxanne: It is when you drop out of catholic school.

So my brother likes a beer or two. What guy doesn't? - Jack

As serious as a heart attack. - Pete

You cannot tell me how to act. - Meg

What kind of guy in college messes around with a girl in high school? - J.J.

Girls can be a challenge. - Helen

Get it. My life is none of your business. - Meg

Most of these girls are here because they have nothing else. - Lenny

Have some waffles with your syrup. - Helen

That's exactly why God gave you a brother - so you could date his friends. - Roxanne

They have payphones on tour. - Roxanne

He probably misses you so much that he doesn't know what to say. It's probably easier not talking at all. - Luke

See, dating two guys at the same time isn't so hard. - Roxanne

Well my grandfather used to say when you don't know what to do, flip a coin. - Meg

If ping pong was a real sport, I'd have a gold medal. - Perez

That's not a family tree, Will. That's a family tumbleweed. - Patty

Meg: How am I supposed to compete with all theses girls who don't have -
Roxanne: Morals?
Meg: Curfews.

Meg, they are always ready before you are. - Roxanne

No, everyone goes out to meet Mr. Right, I've already met him. - Beth

Did you ever hear the expression, "If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is?" - Henry

Remember to hold the door open for her. And tell her she looks nice. Oh, and don't try to kiss her unless you've held her hand first. Girls hate that. - Roxanne

A colored man can be his own boss. - Melvin Bishop

Put up or shut up. - Perez

We do a man's work here. War is no place for a woman. - Perez

I'd help too but when Meg's driving, we should all stay off the road. - Patty

People always pay up when they see a cop. - Pete

Sometimes with your brother, it's like having another child around. - Helen

Some people think the world revolves around them. - Jack

You want some cover up, try a paper bag. - Roxanne

Why do I feel like I'm catching stupid by being near you? - J.J.'s soldier friend

They're in a long distance argument. - Patty

What kind of religion tells you not to fight for your country? - Henry

People shouldn't have to fight if they don't believe in it. - Meg

I'm not really the type that protests, more just the type that lets things happen. - Roxanne

You're mean enough to be a nun. - Will

The Hangover

Alan: I want you to know, I'm a steel trap. Whatever happens tonight, I will never ever ever speak a word of it. Seriously, I don't care what happens, I don't care if we kill someone.

Monday, December 7, 2009

Tests From Last Night

(631): the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama

(630): I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important

(256): we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.

(651): make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
(1-651): I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.

(807): I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.

(401): im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college

(702): I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore

(513): Ashley and Jimmy are about to have sex on Degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME

(248): Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.

(814): i live my life in a constant state of hangover.

(603): She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her

(517): Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.

(918): New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?

(763): I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.

(985): any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.

(909): I thought it was weird tha...t her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him

(519): and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"

(510): he said he didn't have a condom.
(415): and you said?
(510): that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.

(214): Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.

(847): I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
(1-847): How was it?
(847): Fantastic, but that's not the point.

(601): I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.

(515): Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definitely here

(954): so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral

(773): I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it

(214): probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time (972): i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"

(254): just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.

(937): Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date

(267): New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.

(248): He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???

(773): omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...

(256): A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality

(650): I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets

(609): So i'm using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation

(575): She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.

(224): Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?

(512): I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.

(407): Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.

(916): Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms

(517): dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.

(612): I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.

(845): i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.

(617): Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises

(860): yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
(860): but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
(860): but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies

(443): i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober

(602): So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.

(734): I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.

(914): after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.

(407): Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?

(931): dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.

(561): my being single is dangerous.

(601): I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.

(416): we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance

(313): You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now

(618): i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied
them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.

(905): when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college

(650): Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss

(315): can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet

(860): Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.

(515): Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definitely here

(304): I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.

(240): Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.

(612): Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?

(203): dont like to call her my roommate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me

(610): I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.

(661): how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?

(587): His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
(780): You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
(587): She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.

(740): i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.

(303): This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free

(608): If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.

(910): is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.

(1-510): you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.

(248): ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.

(908): My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"

(781): I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.

(218): No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus

(810): I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again

(229): New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.

(530): the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo

(317): There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??

(913): I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a
whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture

(407): Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?

(931): dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.

"Inspirational" Facebook Statuses and Such

Molly Harmon: "Hail Mary full of grace, smack a Bitch in the face. Take her Gucci Bag and the North Face off her back, jab her if she act. Funny with the money, oh you got me mistaken, Honey..." An ode to the SMC bullshit, from B.I.G to the Bitches!

Molly Harmon: Brush the coke off your nose and put on your jorts...we are going to the Waffle House, so you gotta keep it classy!

Molly Harmon: The dirty bastards have impounded Ron Jeremy for being parked in a space "reserved for motor vehicles only"...I am protesting this bullshit in hopes of unshackling his innocent soul allowing me to have him between my legs once more. Join me in the First Annual Park Your Bike Like a Drunkass Would to Free Ron- A series... of rogue bike parkings will occur every night this week until Security gives me my GD bike back!

Kendall Davis: I don´t wear tight jeans lyk da white boys
But I do get wasted lyk da white boys

Symone: WARNING: Doing the "stanky leg" too hard may result in lost property

Molly Harmon: I'm getting naked, starting the Revolution, and bringing Woodstock ideals to my generation. Its gonna be awesome...

Matt: a foot in the door is better than a stick in the eye

Krystal L. Bailey: Imitation is the highest form of robbery.

Britney Nicole: "Fear is temporary...Regret is forever."

Britney Nicole: "Cute enough to make you look twice..Sweet enough but not always nice..a little crazy but not too wild..the kind of girl who will make you smile =)"

Britney Nicole: "You gotta dance like nobody's watching, dream like you will live forever, live like you're going to die tomorrow and love like it's never going to hurt."

Britney Nicole: "Destroy what Destroys you..."

Britney Nicole: "People rarely say what they mean, thats the interesting part; whats going on beneath the surface...." Edvard in The Prince & Me

Britney Nicole: "Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted." ~ John Lennon

Britney Nicole: Math is a legal form of torture invented by people who hate joy!

Britney Nicole: "When we live such fragile lives, It's the best way we survive, I go around a time or two, Just to waste my time with you...I'll keep you my dirty little secret, Don't tell anyone or you`ll be just another regret, My dirty little secret, Who has to know?!" Dirty Little Secret All-American Rejects =)

Britney Nicole: "Isn't it ironic? We ignore the ones who adore us, adore the ones that ignore us, love the ones that hurt us, & hurt the ones that love us =("

Britney Nicole: Usually the things you are most scared of are the most worthwhile...just a theory =) Chasing Liberty

Britney Nicole: I will never apologize for what I feel, because that's like saying your sorry for being real!

Aleesha Lynn: If you believe in forever, then life is just a one night stand. If there's a rock and roll heaven, well, you know they got a hell of a band.

Aleesha Lynn: I just wanna fly away, from all of this pain, things don't feel the same, feel like you're to blame.

Aleesha Lynn: Better get ya shit right before you get stomped out, better yet bottle action and I put ya lights out! Got a bad ass temper and I'm dealin' with that, gettin' kinda crazy beatin' bitches with bats, I'm kinda confused you ain't talkin' much now, next time you see me girl you'll be takin' a bow, as you see I'm not a kid and I don't play games, my name says it all I'll just take a bottle in hand.

Aleesha Lynn: A sure thing just might fail you, women often conduct themselves just like males do, so dudes do that while these ladies stealin' it, we do the same shit with a better job of concealin' it!

Aleesha Lynn: Every day becomes a yesterday and yesterdays just don't matter.

Aleesha Lynn: Cold As A Winter Day, Hot As A Summer's Eve, Young Money Thieves, Steal Your Love and Leave

Aleesha Lynn: I got a one way ticket on a hell bound train with nothing to lose and nothing to gain, I'm feelin' like I'm lost, like I'll never be found, I'm twisted and I'm turned around. So what do you do when it all comes down on you? Do you run and hide or face the truth.

Michelle Thomas: I believe in Karma, what you give is what you get returned. I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned. I believe the grass is more greener on the other side. I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye.

Michelle Thomas: Don't be reckless with other peoples hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Molly Harmon: Theory about Finals: Everything is everything, what is meant to be will be.

Molly Harmon: All I want for Christmas is for the hallway to stop smelling like ass...

James Thomas Overholser: Have your whip in my driveway by tomorrow
Secretly i know u wanna hit it like the lotto
And after that we could ketchup like tomato
Or we could make love in Italy in the grotto
Fresh off the jet at the mat they're screaming bravo
Steppin' in my Jimmy Choo's yeah got it all cute for you baby
Nothing like those other girls i would never be rude to you baby
Can we just say that you wanna be more than just friends

Jenn Cassidy: let's get a jersey shore house and recreate what the fucks on mtv have ruined

Molly Harmon: Cripple fight....Molly "Mizzle to the Hizzle" Harmon vs. Jackie "I'm not getting any so I'm a closet twat" D.

Molly Harmon: I'm getting naked, starting the Revolution, and bringing Woodstock ideals to my generation. Its gonna be awesome...

Jenn Cassidy: "If the first woman God ever made was strong enough to turn the world upside down all alone, these women together ought to be able to turn it back, and it get it right side up again! And now they are asking to do it, the men better let them."- Sojourner Truth......

Lisa Birk: Life ain't always beautiful, sometimes it's just plain hard. Life can knock you down, it can break your heart. Life ain't always beautiful, you think you're on your way and it's just a dead end road at the end of the day. But the struggles makes you stronger and the changes make you wise and happiness has it's own wa...y of taking it's sweet time...

Karen Borja: --straight from the shower-- "what if Hogwarts was real and those English Bastards are hiding it from us?? -j.robb.

Chase Sorrells: she said she like my K-I-S-S-I-N-G, my swag, my walk, my L-O-V-E. you wonder why she missin me? because i'm that man you i'm that man you wish you could be.

Mallory Price: "How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life, you will have been all of these." -George Washington Carver

Megan Hughes: Charm and nothing but charm at last grows a little tiresome. It's a relief then to deal with a man who isn't quite so delightful but a little more sincere.

Alex Giorgio: dear sarah palin, please shut the fuck up. you do not know anything about climate change, and frankly, you could care less. all you care about is yourself and doing whatever you can possibly do to stay in the public eye. the republicans will NOT nominate you for president, so do yourself a favor...set up a pitch meeting with fox news for a new show...if they will put glenn beck on the air, they will put anyone...

Jared Fadden: I'm sick of Teabagger-uber-patriot-douchebaggery and stupidity. Why someone wants to identify with an asshole like Glenn Beck and subscribe to his retarded conspiracies is beyond me. Why would you want to get news from an extremely biased source like FoxNews? (this is the part where everyone that likes FoxNews says "we...ll all other news channels are liberally biased", which is a stupid argument because thats not true, and why would you want your news through a filter anyway whether its liberal or conservative?).
I also find the "Teabagger" movement funny because of the name, if you don't know why that is hilarious, ask someone you know who plays video games why "Teabagger" is a funny word.

Jared Fadden: "Its the love of guilt, that forms a habit, of being dramatically over-dramatic" -- Jamison Parker

Jared Fadden: "You can never solve a problem with the same kind of thinking that created the problem in the first place." -- Albert Einstein

Jared Fadden: "Do not pity the dead... Pity the living, and, above all those who live without love." -- Albus Dumbledore

Jared Fadden: "Ridicule is the only weapon which can be used against unintelligible propositions." -- Thomas Jefferson

Jared Fadden: "Heroism on command, senseless violence, and all the loathsome nonsense that goes by the name of patriotism -how passionately I hate them!" -- Albert Einstein

Jared Fadden: "Truly man is the king of beasts, for his brutality exceeds theirs. We live by the death of others: we are burial places! I have from an early age abjured the use of meat, and the time will come when men such as I will look on the murder of animals as they now look on the murder of men." -- Leonardo da Vinci

Jared Fadden: "Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding." -- Albert Einstein

Jared Fadden: "We were the kings and queens of promise, We were the phantoms of ourselves, maybe the children of a lesser God, Between Heaven and Hell."

Jared Fadden: (This is a real quote from 'Going Rogue') Sarah Palin to vegetarians: "If God had not intended for us to eat animals, how come He made them out of meat?"... In other news, Sarah Palin endorses cannibalism.

Jared Fadden: Psalm 109:8 - "Let his days be few; and let another take his office" is followed by (psalm 109:9) "let his children be fatherless, and his wife a widow".
Why am I telling you this? Because this verse is being merchandised on t-shirts, coffee mugs, aprons, etc, for right wing lunatics of this country. The merchandise say...s "Pray for Obama, Psalm 109:8". Sinister right?
If you believe this is okay, If you think its funny, you are out-of-your-mind crazy, or just completely and utterly ignorant. There is nothing funny about inciting or referencing violence towards our President, whether or not you agree with him.
You can criticize the President if you don't agree with him, but to invoke a biblical passage that calls for the death of a leader, is a whole other step of lunacy.

Jared Fadden: "There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written." -- Oscar Wilde

Jared Fadden: "If your conspiracy theory can be disproved by spending 90 seconds of research time on Wikipedia, its a bad conspiracy theory."

Jared Fadden: "This is for the record, History is written by the victor, History is filled with liars..." -- Captain Price from COD:MW2

Molly Harmon: Well that was about as fun as fuckin a sandpaper dick...

auraBeth Urban: Time is all you have. And you may find one day that you have less of than you think.

Megan Hughes: Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.

Cory Gilmartin: The emotional ups and downs of life can put strain on all facets of your life..

Cory Gilmartin: Things just have to be complex, and thats why the simple things make us feel so much better

Cory Gilmartin: Money may make the world go around, but it’s there to make people happy; its generosity that gets things done and inspires happiness.

Cory Gilmartin: You have to dream big to become big...

Cory Gilmartin: with a little ambition anything can be achieved...

Cory Gilmartin: The farthest ends of our dreams can be obtained through dedication and perseverance!

Britney Nicole: "Bad news stops us for a little while, but hope....hope is paralyzing..." ~ Criminal Minds

Britney Nicole: People make mistakes, sometimes over and over again. Forgive them, because if it's a mistake then they were confused about how to do the right thing.

Britney Nicole: "At the center of your being you have the answers; you know who you are and you know what you want..."

Britney Nicole: "You must do the thing which you think you cannot do!" - Criminal Minds

Britney Nicole: He’s a good time cowboy casanova, Leaning up against the record machine, Looks like a cool drink of water, But he’s candy-coated misery, He’s the devil in disguise, A snake with blue eyes, And he only comes out at night, Gives you feelings that you don’t want to fight You better run for your life...

Krista Durski: If I told you once, then I told you twice, you gotta get to know me. There's more to a relationship then jumping in the sheets and if that's all you want then you better go, 'cuz that ain't me. I don't give my love to just anybody, if I'm not correct, then prove me wrong, and just hold on. Gradually, you will see, just... how good it'll be. When the time is right, I'll ease your mind with a little bump and grind.

Krista Durski: According to you, I'm stupid, I'm useless, I can't do anything right. According to you, I'm difficult, hard to please, forever changing my mind. I'm a mess in a dress, can't show up on time, even if it would save my life. According to you. According to you.

Brandon B: If the world lived an eye for an eye it makes us all blind~ GHANDI

Matt Baxter: If you look too hard you can't see it. Just don't look for it, just have fun

Matt Baxter: Patience is not a virtue, it's just a waste of time

Matt Baxter: Man who runs behind a car is exhausted

Matt Baxter: Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them

Matt Baxter: A wise man does not need advice and a fool won't take it.

Jennifer Lynn Vidrine: Quote of Day: "When you make a mistake, don't look back at it long. Take the reason of the thing into your mind and then look forward. Mistakes are lessons of wisdom. The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power."

Jennifer Lynn Vidrine: Quote Of Day: "Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy"

Jennifer Lynn Vidrine: Quote of Day: "I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. We cannot change our past. We cannot change the fact that people act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. And so it is with you. We are in charge of our attitudes."

Jennifer Lynn Vidrine: Thought of day: "One of the things I keep learning is that the secret of being happy is doing things for other people."

Jennifer Lynn Vidrine: Quote of the Day: "You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do"

Kara Bowman: "Unless it's mad, passionate, extraordinary love, it's a waste of time. There are too many mediocre things in life- love should not be one of them." -Unknown

Marc Mason: Inspirational Quote of the Evening: Do not follow where the path may lead. Go, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail. -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Devin Hillsdon-Smith: "Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan 'Press O...n' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race."

Molly Harmon: Its not the poop, its the mystery behind the poop.

Courtney Lare: "Life's most persistent and urgent question is, 'What are you doing for others?'" ~MLK

Kara Dibley: "When you are lying half asleep in you room Unaware if it is midnight or afternoon Because the water doesn't flood the stairwell It could be raining but you can never tell."

Logan Cenova: take my advice, smile and move on. life's too short to let a-holes ruin your day. rest in the knowledge that you have the prince of peace within you. or that you could take that jerk in a fight. whichever you prefer.

Kathryn Stewart: "Frame every so-called disaster with these words ''In five years, will this matter?"

Brian Meeks: "Look! What did I just say about ethnic slurs??" ~Will Ferrel~

Whitney Barncord: Tie my handlebars to the stars so I stay on track

Nikki Focht: ...Do you really enjoy living a life that's so hateful? Cause there's a hole where your soul should be. Your losing control of it and it's really distasteful ♫♪♫♪

Melissa Lein: Nothing is forever. There's got to be something better than in the middle

Alex Giorgio: Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it. -Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Alex Giorgio: Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted. -Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Mallory Price: Power at its best is love implementing the demands of justice. Justice at its best is love correcting everything that stands against love. -MLK

Daniel Colt Collins: We must carry his message forward not only in words but through the way we live: "Everybody can be great because everybody can serve." -MLK

Britney Nicole: In the end, we only regret the chances we didn't take, the relationships we were afraid to have, and the decisions we waited too long to make...

Britney Nicole: "Tough times never last, but tough people do."~Robert H. Schuller

Britney Nicole: "Run run away..Don’t let him mess with your mind..He’ll tell you anything you want to hear..He’ll break your heart..It’s just a matter of time..But just remember...He’s a good time cowboy casanova.." Carrie Underwood Cowboy Casanova

Sam Cassady: Women wish to be loved not because they are pretty, or good, or well bred, or graceful, or intelligent, but because they are themselves

Sam Cassady: “The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in

Sam Cassady: never takes long to fall for someone... but takes so long to forget her

Emily Ponder: "To live on nothing a day is difficult enough, but to save on it would beat the cleverest political economist who ever lived." -William Booth, founder of the Salvation Army

Jennifer Lynn Vidrine: "Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around."

Krystal L. Bailey: Krystalizm 55: The strength of a woman can carry the weight of the world...but I don't always have to carry it alone.

Krystal L. Bailey: Krystalizm 73: Eventually all the temporary people will 'Fade to Black!

Krystal L. Bailey: ♪♪..Could you be my sunshine on a cloudy? Could you be my yellow when I'm feeling gray? Could you be my river help me float away? Could you be my sunshine on a cloudy?..♪♪

Krystal L. Bailey: ♫..but i need u to want me need you to miss me i need your attention i need you next me i need someone to clap for me i need your affection..♫

Krystal L. Bailey: Krystalizm 24: Be what you expect of others to be so they can have a template of how they should be!

Danielle Meador: if what doesn't kill us is makin' us stonger, we're gonna last longer than the greatest wall of China, or the rabbit with the drum :P

Sweetess Taböö I need to eat Dining Hall food about as much as I need a STD.

Sweetess Taböö If these are the best 4 years of my life, Im gonna drink more when I graduate than I do now.

Sweetess Taböö Tired of letting SMC control every aspect of my life. Starting today Im puttin this fuckfest in Reverse Cowgirl and runnin shit! "Giddy up Giddy up"

Gabi Anglin Did you know that gay used to mean 'happy?' When I was growing up, it meant 'lame.' And now, it means a man who makes love to other men. We're all homos. Homo sapiens.

Gabi Anglin Reduce, reuse, recylcle should not apply to girls

Gabi Anglin "Nothing worth having comes easily"- Sweetess Taböö

Jenn Cassidy sometimes you just gots to get your freak on

Gabi Anglin Lookin for sexy chick dogs for Duke to impregnate .....

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Cadet Kelly

Kelly: Babies can't salute. They're little. They cry even when they don't have to. They're not exactly clean but they smell pretty good, most of the time. They have to be smiled at constantly and you have to carry them around all night and day. If not, they tend to yell.

Kelly: It amaze me that the stuff you learn in military school could actually apply to real life.

Kelly: Since this is my first autobiography, I might not have gotten everything right. The events are true, the feelings are genuine, and my memoirs are finished. But, I might've forgotten what everyone was wearing.

Cadet Captain Jennifer Stone: Once a maggot, always a maggot.

Carla: First lesson: Zip it and listen.
Kelly Collins: Two things I have never mastered.

Cadet Captain Jennifer Stone: But I do have one wish for you, Cadet. That you become a platoon leader, and have to deal with a little maggot... Just like you.