Saturday, May 7, 2011

27 Dresses

Kevin: What color is that - vomit?

Kevin: You'd rather focus on other people's Kodak moments than make memories of your own!

Jane: You tell him the truth or I will.
Tess: No, you won't. You wouldn't hurt a fly and you definitely wouldn't hurt me, I'm your sister.
Jane: That was yesterday. Today you're just some bitch who broke my heart and cut up my mother's wedding dress.

Kevin: Love is patient, love is kind, love means slowly losing your mind

Jane's Aunt: Must be so hard to watch your younger sister get married before you.
Jane: Yes. Then I remember that I still get to have hot hate sex with random strangers and I feel SO much better!

Jane: I feel like I just found out my favorite love song was written about a sandwich.

Kevin: No, but Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Drunk were bugging me.

Jane: I think you should just admit that you're a big softy, that this whole cynical thing is just an act so that you can seem wounded and mysterious and sexy...

Kevin: You kinda look like a shiny mermaid.

Jane: Wanna go find the ugliest stuff in the store and register Tess for it?

Casey: [after Jane turns down a drink offer from George] He asks if you want a drink. You smile and say, 'Vodka soda.' If you already have a drink, you down it. Then there's some flirting, some interoffice sex, an accidental pregnancy, a shot gun wedding, and a life of bliss. How many times do we have to go over this?

Jane: God, Casey, can't you keep it in your pants for one wedding?
Casey: Are you kidding? The only reason to wear this monstrous dress is that so some drunken groomsman can rip it to shreds with his teeth.

Jane: How refreshing! A man who doesn't believe in marriage.
Kevin: I'm just trying to point out the hypocrisy of the spectacle.
Jane: Oh! That's so noble of you. Do you also go around telling small children that Santa Claus doesn't exist? 'Cause someone needs to blow that shit wide open.
Kevin: A-ha! So you admit that believe in marriage is kind of like believing in Santa Claus!

Casey: What good is it being appreciated if no one is naked?

Jane: You write the most beautiful things. Do you actually believe in love and marriage and just pretend to be a cynic or are you actually a cynic who knows how to spin romantic crap for girls like me?
Kevin: I didn't follow that at all, but I think the second one, the spinning crap one.

Casey: So what happened?
Jane: He needed to know the truth.
Casey: You could have told him face-to-face. I mean, I know my moral compass doesn't exactly point due north, but... if I say something's wrong, something's wrong.
Jane: You're the one who's always telling me to stand up for myself.
Casey: Yeah, but that's not what you did. What you did was unleash twenty years of repressed feelings in one night. It was entertaining, don't get me wrong, but if it was the right thing to do, you'd feel better right now. Do you feel better right now?

Tess: "If Jane is the prototypical accommodating bridesmaid, then her sister Tess is cast as the overbearing, overindulged bride-to-be who at any moment might start stomping around Manhattan, breathing fire, and swatting planes from the sky."
Jane: I had no idea he was writing an article about me.
Tess: You? He called me Bridezilla! In the New York freaking Journal! I could tear him apart limb from limb!

Just Like Heaven

J.J.: God gave us alcohol as a social lubricant. Make men brave, make women loose.

J.J.: See this? This is the world. Join it. Stop swimming around in your mind. That is a dangerous neighborhood you should not go into alone.

Elizabeth: All I know is that when I'm not with you it's like I don't exist.

Elizabeth: Look, you have two realities to choose from: First one being that a woman has come into your life in a very unconventional way and she happens to need your assistance. The second one is that you're an insane person, and you're sitting on a park bench right now talking to yourself.

Dave: You're like an AM radio someone shoved in my head and I can't turn off.

Elizabeth: I may have been a lonely home-wrecking whore, but I saved lives!

Darryl: Can't you feel that, man? There's like this cancer-causing ray of spirit hate searing right towards your body.

Katrina: Osama, communism is way over, so like give your people some toilet paper.