The Proposal

Margaret: Frank, people in this country are busy, broke, and they hate to read. They need someone they can trust to say, "Hey! Don't watch CSI: Indianapolis tonight. Read a book. Read Frank's book." And that person is Oprah.

Margaret: Frank, the truth is all A-plus novelists do publicity.

Margaret: If I want your praise, I will ask for it.

Bob: You poisonous bitch! You can't fire me! You dont think I see what you're doing here? Sandbagging me on this Oprah thing just so you can look good to the board? Because you are threatened by me! And you are a monster. Just because you have no semblance of a life outside of this office, you think you can treat all of us like your own personal slaves. You know what? I feel sorry for you. Because you know what you're gonna have on your deathbed? Nothing and no one.
Margaret: Listen carefully, Bob. I didn't fire you because I feel threatened. No. I fired you because you're lazy, entitled, incompetent and you spend more time cheating on your wife than you do in your office. And if you say another word Andrew here is going to have you thrown out on your ass - O.K.? Another word and you're out of here with an armed escort. Andrew will film it on his little cameraphone and put it on that Internet site. What's that?
Andrew: YouTube.
Margaret: Exactly. Is that what you want? Didn't think so. I have work to do.

Margaret: Here you go. Will you marry me?
Andrew: No. Say it like you mean it.
Margaret: Andrew.
Andrew: Yes, Margaret.
Margaret: Sweet Andrew.
Andrew: I'm listening.
Margaret: Would you please, with cherries on top, marry me?
Andrew: Okay. I don't appreciate the sarcasm, but I'll do it. See you at the airport tomorrow.

Margaret: What am I allergic to?
Andrew: Pine nuts. And the full spectrum of human emotion.

Gammy: Do you prefer Margaret or "Satan's Mistress"? We've heard it both ways. Actually, we've heard it lots of ways.

Andrew: But for you it's going to require you to stop snacking on children while they dream.

Gammy: How a man proposes says alot about his character.

Andrew: You know what? Actually, Margaret loves telling this story, so I'm just gonna let her go ahead and do that. We should just sit and rapture.
Margaret: Wow, okay... wow, where to begin... the story... Well, um, wow... Okay, well, um, Andrew and I... Andrew and I were about to celebrate our first anniversary together and I knew that he'd been itching to ask me to marry him and he was scared, like a little tiny bird. So, I started leaving him little hints here and there because I knew he wouldn't have the guts to ask...
Andrew: That's not exactly how it happened.
Margaret: No?
Andrew: No, no, I mean I picked up on all of her little hints... this woman is about as subtle as a gun. Yeah, no what I was worried about was that she might find this little box...
Margaret: Oh, the decoupage box that he made, where he'd taken the time to cut out twenty little pictures of himself, just pasted all over the box. So beautiful! I opened that beautiful little decoupage and out fluttered these tiny little hand cut heart confettis and once they cleared, I looked down and I saw the most beautiful, big...
Andrew: ...fat nothing! No ring.
Grandma: No ring?
Grace: What?
Andrew: No, but inside that box, underneath all that crap, a handwritten note with the address to a hotel, date and time. Real Humphrey Bogart type stuff. Masculine. Naturally, Margaret, she thought...
Margaret: I thought he was seeing someone else... so it was a terrible time for me, but I went to that hotel anyway, I went there and I pounded on the door. But the door was already unlocked. As I swung open that door, there he was...
Andrew: Standing.
Margaret: Kneeling.
Andrew: Like a man.
Margaret: On a bed of rosebuds, in a tuxedo. Your son. Your son... and he was choking back soft, soft sobs. And when he held back the tears and finally caught his breath, he said to me...
Andrew: 'Margaret, will you marry me?' and she said 'yep', the end!

Margaret: If you touch my ass one more time, I will cut your balls off in your sleep. Okay?

Margaret: I like the Psychic Network. Not in the "ha ha, isn't that funny, she likes that trash" kind of way. I actually quite enjoy it. Um, I took disco lessons in the sixth grade. My first concert was Rob Base & DJ E-Z Rock. I think Brian Dennehy is sexy. Don't like flowers in the house because they remind me of funerals. Never played a video game. I real Withering Heights during Christmas. It's my favorite book. Haven't slept with a man in over a year and a half. And, uh, I went to the bathroom and cried after Bob called me a poisonous bitch. And the bird tattoo... They're swallows. Got them when I was 16... after my parents died. Stupid.

Gammy: Grandmothers love to give their stuff to grandchildren. It makes us feel like we'll still be part of your lives even after we're gone.

Margaret: I forgot what it's like to have a family. I've been on my own since I was 16 and I forgot what it felt like to have people love you and make you breakfast and say, "hey! We'd love to come down for the holidays." And I say, "Well, why don't we come up and see you instead?" And give you necklaces! And you have all that here, and you have Gertrude, and I'm... I'm just screwing it up!

Andrew: I don't think hijacking a boat is a proper way to express your frustration!

Andrew: You want a statement? Here's your statement. I've been working for Margaret Tate for three years. Six months ago we started dating, we fell in love. I asked her to marry me, she said 'yes'. I'll see you at the wedding.

Ramone: We are gathered here today to give thanks and to celebrate one of life's greatest moments. To give recognition to the beauty, honesty, and unselfish ways of Andrew and Margaret's true love in front of family and friends. For it is their family and friends who taught Andrew and Margaret to love. So it is only right that family and friends are all...

Margaret: I, uh,... have a bit of an announcement to make about the wedding. A confession, actually. I'm a Canadian. Yes, Canadian. With an expired visa who was about to be deported. And because I didn't want to leave this wonderful country of yours, I forced Andrew here to marry me. See, Andrew has always had this extraordinary work ethic. Something I think he learned from you. And for three years I watched him work harder than anyone else at our company. And I knew that if I threatened to destroy his career he would, he would do just about anything. So I blackmailed him to come up here and to lie to you. All of you. And I thought it would be easy to watch him do it. But it wasn't. It turns out it's not easy to ruin someone's life once you find our how wonderful they are. You have a beautiful family. Don't let this come between you. This was my fault. Andrew, this was a business deal. You held up your end and now the deal is off. I'm sorry.

Margaret: You were right. This book is special. I lied because I knew publishing meant I'd lose you as an assistant but... you have an extraordinary eye, and I'll make sure we buy this before I leave. Have an amazing life. You deserve it. Margaret.

Andrew: You know what the problem is? The problem is that this woman is a gigantic pain in my ass. First there's the whole leaving thing. I understand that. It's a sham wedding. It's kind of stressful. But then she goes and leaves this note, because she doesn't have the decency, the humanity to do it to my face. Three years. Three years I work with this... this terrorist. Never once has she had a nice thing to say, and then she goes ahead and she writes this crap! But none of that matters because we had a deal! I'm sorry. She just makes me a little bit crazy.

Grace: If she didn't love him, she wouldn't of left.

Andrew: Three days ago, I loathed you. I used to dream about you getting hit by a cab. Then we had our little adventure up in Alaska and things started to changed. Things changed when we kissed. And when you told me about your tattoo. Even when you checked me out when we were naked. But I didn't realize any of this, until I was standing alone... in a barn... wifeless. Now, you could imagine my disappointment when it suddenly dawned on me that the woman I love is about to be kicked out of the country. So Margaret, marry me, because I'd like to date you.

Margaret: There's a reason why I've been alone all this time. I'm comfortable that way. And I think it would just be a lot easier if we forgot everything that happened and I just left.

Ramone: In my mind I see her with someone, perhaps more swarthy, darker.

Ramone: You can tell by the way she drinks her soda pop that she's a good dancer.

Jeepers Creepers 2

Every 23rd Spring, for 23 days, it gets to eat.

Tough as nails, hard as rocks! We are Bannon's fighting cocks! Fighting Bantams, tough as nails! Bow down now or kiss our tails! Out for blood, we're lean and mean! Bannon County's death machine! Bannon Bantams! Bannon Bantams! Go Bantams! Bannon Bantams, power and might! Bannon Bantams, fight, fight, fight! Bannon Bantams, we're the world! You don't mess with a mighty bird! Down the court, we'll clean your clocks! Better not mess with the fighting cock! Bannon Bantams! Bannon Bantams! Go Bantams! Bannon Bantams, wings of steel! Bannon Bantams, kill, kill, kill! Who was that? Don't even ask! Big bad Bantams kick your ass! Bannon Bantams! Bannon Bantams! Go Bantams!

Coach Charlie: Minxie, there's not a girl in this world stupid enough to kill themselves sucking on cancer sticks, am I right?

Scott: People don't fly the fuck away!

Scott: You want to play cock of the walk?

Minxie: It was picking people out. It can smell something, in their fear, to help pick people out.

Rhonda: When people get really scared, it's just like when they get drunk. The real person comes to the surface.