Holly: Were you going to cure her with your magic penis?
Messer: So I'm at the drug store and it dawns on me that women stare at men carrying a baby like a guy will stare at a woman with a great rack.
Holly: This is where you pick up women. You use Sophie to get laid.
Messer: Having someone help you doesn't mean you failed, just means you're not it in alone.
Simon: You know what marriage is like? Imagine a prison, and don't change anything.
Messer: I fell in love with you. I fell in love with our family.
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