Instant Star

There are three types of people in the world: suckers, victims, and grownups. Being a grownup means you get to choose your own destiny. - Jude

Sometimes you gotta live your life on the edge. (Season One)

You're quivering like a porn star in church. (Season Two)

A real kiss isn't in the lips, it's in the heart and if it isn't with [him] then it doesn't count. - Tommy (Season One)

Music is owned by the people who love it. - Pagan

You can't go around kissing people and telling them it doesn't count. That's like lip abuse. - Jamie (Season One)

They say the way you celebrate your birthday sets your tone for the entire year. - Jude (Season One)




Darius: Both y'all gotta learn to accept, when a thing you care about is dying, learn to let it go man.

Darius: A masterpiece so beautiful it made angels weep.

Darius: Condition number 1, you spend every day in here working on your third album until condition 2, you finish it.

Jude: That's the thing about love, every time you give a guy your heart, there's a chance he'll hand it back to you in pieces.

Jude: Spied, a homeless guy just offered to brush my arm hairs, okay? Paradise can't be upstairs from hell and nasty.

Jude: This is crazy, even for a crazy person, which you clearly are.

Mr. Harrison: I mean they never ask Bob Dylan about his sex life
Jude: Well I sure hope not, the guys like 60

Jude: Before I met you, I thought you were gonna suck huge.

Jude: You are like a banana split after a week of being on The Zone

Jude: I need help with lyrics.
Wally: How about..."Life's a test"
Spied: "But you always do your best"
Kyle: "Exposing your right breast"

Jude: It starts out as nothing, just a wish. Out of nothing a wish can catch fire and burn with such intensity, the glow can be seen for miles. Right now my life is on fire. Let it burn.

Jude: There are three types of people in the world, suckers, grownups, and victims. Being a grownup means choosing your own destiny.

Jude: If I have to make a choice, there's no contest. I'm a rockstar.

Jude: I know you care, Tommy, you save a look just for me.

Tommy: I want you to come with me. I want all of you with me forever.
Jude: Oh my God.
Tommy: And I don’t care if you’re herding goats, or waiting tables, or making music. I just want you to be happy. And, um, now you can be, as the sole owner of your own musical catalog.
Jude: What? You got this from Darius? Tommy, what did you have to do?
Tommy: Doesn’t matter. I would do anything for you…because I love you.

Speed: Is your squintless summer melting your grey matter? How long's it been?
Jude: 5 weeks, 3 days. But I can do it.
Speed: Yeah?
Jude: Yeah.
Speed: Right. You miss him.
Kyle: You need to see him.
Speed: You can't live without him.
Kyle: You need to give him a big hug.
Speed: You can't live without his kisses.
Kyle: And his hair gel.
Speed: I can't live without his hair gel.

TOMMY: So, let's meet halfway. Kissing in public is cool but no tongue.
JUDE: We can talk to the cameras about our relationship but no couch jumping.
TOMMY: Deal.
JUDE: So, tell me Tommy Q, limousine- public or private?
TOMMY: That is a bit of a grey area.

Jude: Come on, Tommy. I think we both know what you want to say. That it was a mistake, right? Just a pity kiss. That you don't feel the way I do because I'm just a kid... Just say it. Lie to me.
Tommy: Either I have to quit working with you, or I can stay. But we have to agree that that kiss - it never happened.

Jude: You can be a serious pain in the butt Quincy, but there's not one thing i'd change about you.

Jude: I'm Jude Harrison and I'm a Tommy-holic.

Jude: Your shirt does kind of say 'I love calculus'

Jude; Ain't no party like a Harrison party, 'cause a Harrison party don't stop!

Jude: Ok Spied, I need you to play like Karma just punched you in the face for breathing too loud.

Jude: Why is it always so easy for you to throw us away?
Tommy: Because I'm not good enough for you.

Tommy: Is everyone decent in here?
Jude: I think the iguana is topless.
Tommy: I'll consider myself warned.

Jude: If I was a wrench, where would I be?

Spiederman: Make him you second choice guy...Again! The dude’s been your rebound so many times he’s going to get whiplash!

Jude: Hi! Welcome to the new insanity that is now Gmajor Records, and this is Nurse Darius' ward.

Jude: I feel like if we don't repair this friendship now, we're gonna fizzle into stranger hood.
Tommy: You want to repair it in your pajamas?
Jude: You're right. Quality friend time first, then pajama party.

Speed: Thanks for acting as a buffer between me and Karma's big head.
Jude: And what a head it is.

Jude: I was planning to debut my new basement song tonight, but you're gonna have to wait for that one. It's a fantastic song and I love it, but it's not where my head's at anymore. So I'm gonna do another song instead, and it's about a girl who's just about to fly off and see the world and in order for her to spread her wings, she has to do it alone. So thank you for holding my hand and thanks for letting me go.

Jude: So uhm, here's a funny thing, a funny thing, about relationships. No matter what you expect from a couple, you never know what they're like when they're alone together. And the only two people qualified to say whether those two people even belong together, is those two people.

Jude: I'm twice the artist I ever was because of you.
Tommy: And I'm twice the producer I ever thought I could be because of you.

Jude: The whole poker thing, you were just messing with me?
Tommy: Uhm well documented break-up rule: exes get to push each other’s buttons just for the fun of it. And you were the one who convinced the shop owner to sell us the Bowie in the first place.
Jude: Well you’re still a jerk.

Sadie: Oh, well, you know…looks like a date, smells like a date....
Jude: So opposite to a date, it's a don't.

Jude: It's more of an emergency...A sexmergency.

Jude: Famous or not, a real relationship happens when no one else is looking, when you're alone together, knee deep in quiet moments, with the one you love.

Jude: I used to daydream about it all the time, What it would be like to be famous. I used to sing in front of my mirror you know, with my hairbrush pretending I was on stage. A Rock Star! All I could imagine was the sound of the crowd. The sound of my music pumping through the speakers and then it happened. I woke up and my dream came true.

Jude: You think I'm over-rated, Skidmark? How about you tell your new girlfriend here that nobody even likes you on the tour bus? We only keep you around because you're an okay guitar player! OR how about the fact that you wear the same Ninja Turtles pajamas every single night?!

Jude: I'm little Tommy Q and my pants are so SHINY!

Jude: Some decisions come naturally, sometimes you just know what's right in your heart.

Jude: My heart hasn't always known what's best for itself. How do you know who it is? How could you know?

Jude: This year has been worst and best in my life. I got the chance to start living a dream. I fell in love ...twice, then got my heart broke....twice. Then I learned that parents aren't perfect and that sisters can be your enemy and your friend and that some friends can be your whole world. With people this great in your life you hold on and pray they never leave you, but sometimes your the one who has to leave them. They say life is a journey and if it is the real question isn't 'Where are you going?' It's 'Who's coming with you.'

Jude: Every question in life can be answered by Joey Ramone lyrics. Joey wrote "Touring." Touring is never boring, lets go lets go. But he also wrote "Do you love me back?" so what do say? Do you love me back? There's only one person who can answer that for me. Tom Quincy do you love me back?

Jude: Nothing says I love you like unwrapping your feelings to the world and nothing says he doesn't like a huge dose of public humiliation.

Jude: You know when Tommy was in Boyz Attack, security used to call him Jazzy Hands. Sorry, I'm trying to wean off the Tommy mentionitis.

Jude: They say fame is like a drug, one taste and you’re hooked. And when it comes to celebrity cravings, no one has a more addictive personality than Karma. But there's no one less impressed by fame than Karma's husband. He just wants to keep his wife happy. Looks like she just got her fix.

Jude: She really is a shooting star, unpredictable, but beautiful.

Jude: I'll take my chances on the mean streets Mr. Quincy. But mark my words I'm going to be singing at the Hollywood ball and dining at the ritz faster than you can say cat man do. Good evening Mr.Quincy

Jude: If I fly to London I leave everything normal that's ever kept me grounded.
Tommy: Look around. When they start closing restaurants for you, you left normal eating your dust.

Tommy: The only thing worse than feeling like you can't move on, is the moment you realize that you can.

Tommy: Hey Vince, what part of it’s time for all posers to leave the studio don’t you understand?
Spied: Well, right after you, insecure, little Mangella boy.

Tommy: A real kiss isn't in the lips, it's in the heart.

Tommy: Just so you know, when the dealer is referring to chips, he’s not offering you a snack pack.

Tommy: 'Cause nothing says legitimate singing contest like space prostitutes.

Tommy Q: Same old story, Boy meets band, boy becomes big star of band, band wants to kill boy in sleep.

Tommy: Working in a song it's like falling in love. At first it's a rush, but then it gets painful and sometimes you gotta walk away. But sometimes you come out with something beautiful , like that song.

Tommy : Don't quit. Cause you're it, girl. You're the real thing. You're even better.

Tommy: Most of us go to our graves with our music still inside of us.

Tommy: Welcome to paparazzi hell, population us.

Tommy: I'll eat this mixing board if this is not your best album.

Tommy: Hey Karma, how about we try it again with a little more falsetto and a little less false?

Tommy: Tommy: It would amaze me if you cut out the finger noise and took it from the top without the attitude.

Tommy; It was shallow and bubbly like all great TV theme songs.

Tommy: Jude, just so you know, poker involves actual…math.

Tommy: Thou shalt not make the concept album. Thou shalt not let the drummer sing. Thou shalt not romance within the band.
Tommy: All my life I've been a coward, running away from the things that i wanted...but I'm done running.

Tommy: In my day we were grateful for crackers.

Tommy: In the immortal words of Johnny Cash "You want them to feel it in their guts, you got to sing it from your guts" so go get some

Tommy: A real kiss, it isn't in the lips. Its in the heart and if yours isn't in this one with Shay, then it doesn't count.

Tommy: Don't you ever ask anyone's permission to like your own music, you understand? Do you love that song?

Tommy: You come into my studio again and I will squash you until your emo haircut and converse sneakers are neighbors

Tommy: I know you want to protect your daughter, If i had a daughter I would never let her date me.

Tommy: I'll take you baby, I'll take you like a climber takes everest.I'll take you to the top

Tommy: Don't you ever let your friends, or the crowd, tell you if it rocks. You go out there and you tell them. I believe in you.

Tommy: First, I'm here because Georgia is friend. I could care less about you or your whack contest. Second, the name is Tom Quincy. Don't you ever call me Little Tommy Q again.

Spiederman: Five bucks says they had to pixelate my naked butt at least six times.

Speed: Dude, 3:30 Friday. You and I kick him in the shins and then run!

Spiederman: (To Jude) But I always knew that you only had room in your heart for one guy..and that's Lord Squinty Frooown!!

Speed: Dude, sometimes we walk where the streets have no name and still can't find what we're looking for.

Spiederman: Let's give it up for Can-Do Quincy, back in the studio! Aaah!

Speed: I've got a date with a chimichanga.

Speed: Finally I can scratch my ass without the nation watching

Speed: Dude, you must have cajones of titanium.

Karma: You've broken my heart and kicked my dog, but I am still standing.
Speed: I gotta hand it to you shorty, you are more fly girl that I could ever handle, but I will not leave this apartment until I see you cry.

Karma: If you bring Chichi back right now I won't hurt you. Well I will but not enough to leave a scar.
Speed: How can you say Chichi with a straight face?

Spiederman: Look Jennifer. Apparently, I know more about neuroscience than I do my own fiance.
Karma: Call me that again, and this engagement ring is inside your nose.

Speed: Come on Harrison. You gave up faster than Wally's deodorant.

Jamie: Spied, whatever you're thinking, for the love of your career, please unthink it.
Speed: No can do Jamers. Not when it's brilliant.

Speed: I feel like I'm cheating on Kyle and Wally.

Speed: You know why our audience hates you? It’s because you have no soul.

Speed: Hated first name usage. Low blow.

Speed: Now all we got to worry about is Patsy's ghost coming up behind us and giving us supernatural wedgies.

Speed: Like Wally says, even though you've loved and lost, maybe we can still jam together

Kyle: Don't look at me, I don't think in words.

Patsy: You're quivering like a pornstar in church.

Georgia: Men, can't live with them, can't stuff them in your trunk.

Stuart: So you've been moody and acting out because, why, the moon is full?

Jamie: A sandwich in its previous life. Now it's part of the fragile ecosystem I call Jamesica.

Kyle: It's like teaching sign language to a donkey.

Karma: Speedy, meet Chichi. Chichi, meet poopy head. Speed's a poopy head. Yes he is.

Jamie: Don't sneak up on a guy who has a double ear infection. I can't hear anything.

Karma:I knew from the moment we met your icky, ruthless side we'd be best friends.

Karma: If I ever had to pump my own gas, I would die.

Kat: I can't win. I get a boyfriend and he's in love with you, I make my own clothes and you get designer freebies, I get an old car, and you get the coolest old car ever,And then you get flowers from Tommy fricken Q.

Karma: Now you know my secret. Stop the presses. Karma has feelings. Karma has issues with other women. Karma hasn't had a real friend since 2nd grade.

Van: Your a doll, No really, your like a doll, all blond and manufactured,I can just see my seven year old daughter wanting to stuff you into the dream camper with your crotchless boyfriend.By the way, are you getting any plastic boyfriend action princess pop star?