The O.C.: Taylor Townsend

Getting a man is like capturing a wily silver back gorilla in the Ugandan highlands. You see, nature is telling the gorilla to stay in the wild, but both you and I know that that gorilla would be much happier back in the zoo on a normal feeding schedule. But sometimes he's just gotta roar and beat his chest before he'll let you shoot him with a tranq dart.

Have I told you about my after-after prom party with Sung Ho *and* Young Nam? It was hot and spicy, and let's just say I had my very own Korean barbecue.

Meaning "Ah, that Taylor. She is so pathetic. Someone's the least bit nice to her and she becomes totally obsessed with them. First me, and then her French husband when he lent her a subway ticket, now Ryan."

So what? Yes. I have a psychological predilection to become romantically attached to men who are nice to me, due to the fact I was raised by a she-wolf of a mother who practiced emotional terrorism. Does that mean, that if by some miracle, love does come into my life, I should deny it? What kind of person would that make me? What kind of life..

Yes! It is a yes squared, in all caps, with an exclamation mark and a smiley-faced emoticon.

When [he] told me that he loved me, it's like the whole world melted away. Those words had more power over me. It's scary how much I want, how much I need to hear them.

I want to be with someone who wants to be with me, and not afraid to say it.

When someone tells me that they love me, my world melts away. I wanted...I needed to hear it. Nothing else matters.

"Nolite te bastardes carborundorum"
Don't let the bastards get you down.

Everyone's different. It's what makes the world beautiful.

Did you read the part where it says you're a great lover?

Just because I want to use your body like a jungle gym doesn't mean we need to get married.

Well, you didn't run away that time so you must not be that scared of me.

What? What do you care if I rented a homosexual for the evening, and paid him with rare collectibles from Asian cinema? Is that so wrong?

He’s got this wonderfully hairless body. It’s like hooking up with a seal.

I know you guys are just making an excuse to get away from me. It’s okay! It’s cute!

You drew the short straw. You know after sex and everyone is hungry but no one wants to get the food.

If sex were a martial art, I'd be a black belt.

Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs. Being purged, a fire sparkling in lovers eyes.

If you save someone's life, you're bound to them forever.

There's no one older than a high school senior, no one younger than a college freshman.

I feel like everything I thought I knew, everything I expected had just gone out the window.

It's exciting not knowing what's going to happen.

I never sleep more than 4 hours a night. It's unproductive.

I pretended to be a sleep therapist to seduce you.

Taylor: Why do you have to be so mean? Neither he nor I are remotely fat. We are smart and attractive and interesting. And people like us. And we are not going to let you make us feel bad about ourselves anymore.
Taylor’s mom: No? Well, I can imagine the mirror does that for you.
Taylor: You bitch!