Grey's Anatomy: Cristina Yang

We don't have to do that thing, where you know, I say something, then you say something, and somebody cries, and there's like a moment...

Surgery's hot. It's the marines. It's macho. It's hostile. It's hardcore. Geriatrics are for freaks who live with their mothers and never have sex.

Was he good? I mean, he looks like he'd be good, was it any good?

Yeah. I hear one of them is a model. Seriously, that's gonna help with the respect thing?

I grew up in Beverly Hills. The only Chinese I know is from a Mr. Chow's menu. Besides, I'm Korean.

So this is what you do with your bad days, make out with McDreamy.

I learned that sometimes you have to think about other people.

I didn’t think you’d want to hear about every guy I’ve ever slept with.

You know, it's like there's a wall. The attendings and the residents are over there being surgeons, and we're over here being...

Not to mention he'll never be able to have sex again.

Cakes and little place cards, okay, he’s turning into a girl.

The pig who called Meredith a nurse. I hate you on principle.

Look, I'd rip your face off if it meant I got to scrub in.

I need a drink, a man, or a massage... or a drunken massage from a man.

I blame the babies, they make you toxic.

She's the vice president of fantasyland!

The V.I.Penis.

Drugs are for babies.

I’m her cruise director who's been pushing her around all day.

So what, you're just going to repress everything in some deep, dark, twisted place until one day you snap and you kill them? That's why we're friends.

Oh, it's like candy, but with blood. Which is so much better.

You are 8 ft tall. Your boobs are perfect. Your hair is down to there. If I were you, I would walk around all the time. I wouldn’t have a job, I wouldn’t have the skills, I wouldn’t know how to read. I’d just be naked.

We ARE workaholics with God complexes.

Why are you even surprised? You sleep with a snake, you get bit.

So here’s where we are. I work too much, I’m competitive, I’m always right. And I snore.

The bigger the party, the less time for bad sex with the hockey player.

You invited the preschoolers to Meredith's house. The next thing you'll say is you invited the shrinks. She invited mental defects. This party's D.O.A.

If I stuck this fork into his thigh, would I get in trouble?

Basically, you're an ass.

I like you bitter and pissed off. You’re almost like a normal person now.

You need a definition? You really want to be that guy?

Clearly being alone has its benefits.

Sex all night isn't about being responsible.

You want to be me, but you can’t be me.

Well, she works hard all day. She's good at her job, why should you care how she unwinds? I mean you like to bake all night, others like to drink, others like an occasional screaming orgasm.

I’m sorry I get mean when I’m tired.

Of course you are. And I'm a chicken.

If I am missing out on a real patient because of this. They are going to call me 007 because I killed you.

Will you stop backseat cutting?

Meredith, this is Fight Club! Nobody talks about it!

Keep your panties on Nancy Drew.

It's the syphilis line.

Interns are weak. I don’t like interns.

I don’t do rings.

I miss philandering whore Meredith. She was trashy and much less delicate.

A dude named Preston is going to get his ass kicked by a squirrel.

Well, you know what happens to pregnant interns. I'm not switching to vagina squad or spending my life popping zits. I'm too talented, surgery's my life.

I'm pregnant. I win.

Switzerland. It's very neutral there and they make very nice watches.

Shut up... I'm your person.

Once this pregnancy is taken care of, Burke won’t even be a blip on my radar, he'll be a smudge.

Why is that such a shock? Even George managed to get some action.

Okay, well swallowing monopoly pieces wasn’t exactly a genius move.

I know you’re the boss of me, and you could make my life a living hell in torture and pain and all, but just in the future, I don’t babysit.

It’s brutal being the caretaker. It’s the caretakers that are the silent victims.

It's not that Burke broke up with me. It's how he broke up with me. Like it was business. Like a business trans... Like he's the boss of me.

Now I'm having hormone surges.

Look, the problem is estrogen.

Around here the only thing that spreads faster than a disease is gossip.

This is a problem that has a solution, Burke. There are a lot of problems that don’t.

You know I used to be all business, and then he goes and gets me pregnant.

He ruined me. I'm ruined. He turned me into this... fat, stupid, pregnant girl... who cares.

Estrogen, George.

Dude, you collapsed on the floor. This is your bar, you know how filthy this floor is.

You're lucky. I feel pissed off.

Yeah, yeah, I scored big.

You did a cut throat thing, deal with it. Don’t come to be for absolution. You want to be a shark, be a shark.

My mother used to buy me Judy dolls. Manhattan Judy, Surfer Judy, Disco Judy. I dissected them. Cut off their arms and shaved their heads.

They're sexist, distorted, devil toys that create unrealistic image-expectations catering to the porn-driven minds of men.

Slutty mistress.

Sleeping with our bosses was a GREAT idea...

Trying to save a patient from death is pretty compassionate.

Oh, with Burke? I can't have the hateful married couple instead?

Okay, we’re a couple. Don’t make a big deal out of it.

Mother... Go bolster something.

In your dreams evil spawn.

Meredith, leave the sarcasm up to me, really, it doesn’t suit you.

I have work to do. I’m not a professional note taker anymore.

I will not be Meredith Grey. I busted my ass to get here and people won’t make allowances.

Mer, MER. You can NOT leave me alone with her... I am flying over the coo-coo's nest here, you have to save me!

The daughter you raised is begging for you to go NOW.

Since when does having possession of ovaries an insult?

This isn’t a fake crisis. This is ‘my ex is about to ruin my impending marriage’ crisis.

Fake mama is better than a real mama.

Is it a problem that I slept with my professor and that I was good enough to keep at it for three years?

I am the best intern you've got. And you are wasting me on puke and boils, and I get it, I even deserve it, but please, you can't keep me away from this surgery. I EARNED this surgery. I STOLE this surgery.

How is that possible? She's a WASP. Liquor is like oxygen to a WASP.

Right, sixty geeks in scrubs are your friends.

I'm the one in hell. Burke's going all Iron Chef in your kitchen. Get your ass back here and save me.

You're a bartender, how did you not bring liquor?

Freaking stupid cotton candy color bridesmaids.

I am not a bride. I am a surgeon.

You know, the OR is the one place where I can come and think. I'm thinking right now, okay.

Well, if a key turns in a lock and no one asked for the key or even wanted the key, does it make a sound?

This... is where I live. My mother decorated it. I don't do laundry, I buy new underwear. See, and uh, under the table? Six months of magazines I know I'll never read, but I won't throw out. I don't wash dishes, vacuum, or put the toilet paper on the holder. I hired a maid once, she ran away crying. Uh... the only things in my fridge are water, vodka, and diet soda. And I don't care, but you do. Still think living together is a good idea?

Hey, Julie has her organs on the outside of her body and she's still alive, thank you!

She's seriously deranged.

Dr. Bailey, she's a murderer.

Okay really. I cannot straddle another giant ego right now I’m already doing the splits. I need a right leg, right now, or the chief of surgery is going to take away my pretty blue scrubs.

Seriously, she was all over him? What, like mounting him, with all the babies watching? Seriously?

My heart lives in my scalpel.

Okay, let me get this straight. You don't just celebrate Christmas... you actually believe in Santa Claus?

Oh, come on. Fishing a key out of a coffee cup isn’t like some legal binding contract.

So I'm just saying... I think you should decide to live. Live so you can become a doctor, and you can find a way to do heart transplants without someone having to die. Or, live so you can grow up and have kids and... Raise them not to believe in Santa. That would piss your mom off. Just decide to live. Because in your case? Dying really isn't the best revenge.

Okay, listen Tiny Tim, you can take your...

When Tiny Tim goes all Norman Bates on us, I’m blaming it on you.

Okay, the way you're grabbing me now, that's assault.

Unbunch your panties, George. We're helping Alex study.

Take your hand off my boob, Alex.

Think of it as a hand. If someone told you you’d die if you didn’t chop off your hand, you’d do it.

I have number 2 pencils and bottled water. You know the material and get a high score, not as high as mine, but everything is going to be fine.

If the roles were reversed, would you want to spend time with your mother in a confined room with one window?

Today? Tomorrow? In fifty years? We're all gonna die eventually. Now we're late. Let's go!

‘Cause according to Google, you don’t exist.

Whatever. Everybody has problems. Now get your ass out of bed and get to work. Now! Move, move, move!

You know in the movies, how there's always the hero and then there's the other guy? You know, the guy who sees danger, and then runs in the opposite direction? Be the other guy.

You know, he's acting like I committed a crime. Like my apartment is full of stolen goods. He's acting like I kept my apartment to hide stolen good so I could do illegal transplants for money.

McSexy?

Hey honey, I bought you roses, let me back in the house.

If you want crappy things to stop happening to you, then stop accepting crap and demand something more.

Oh please, I don't even have to look at you, I can feel you pouting. Whatever Meredith did, it wasn't on purpose, so get over it already.

I'm not being inappropriate, he's acting like she skinned his puppy.

A-B-C-D... oh gross. E-F-G. This really couldn't suck any worse.

I have an MD from Stanford and a PhD from Berkley, I can handle this diaper... unless you want to.

So what are you going to do, Bambi? Take it from me.

Don't let this threaten your manhood.

This is why people eat their young.

Oh please, eat, eat. I’m begging you to eat. Yummy food. Yummy.

You had sex with Derek in an exam room at the prom last night? You and McDreamy did the nasty nasty?

We all do terrible things.

Well good. You should be because, I mean... I fell asleep because I'd already finished.

You're right, it's not easy for me to be away from the OR. And it's not easy for me to sit in front of you, or any other authority figure for that matter, and not be able to give you the exact answer that you want to hear. I'm the one with the answers. I've always been the one with the answers. But right now sir, I don't have any.

The next time I see her, if she even looks at me sideways, I’m telling her what I think. If she wants to call me a racist, yeah, I’ll call her sexist. Change my career after I’m married? What is this? 1953? She comes at me, I’m going there.

How do you keep your edge sir? Because I've watched you and you've been doing this a long time and you're clean, you're focused, you are the job, nothing gets to you. And the thing is sir, I was like that, until I got here. Until I actually started doing this job and now everything is, is fuzzy and...

No see sir, this is the point. Because I can't tell you, I can't tell you what happened in that room. And before I could have, no guilt, no loyalties, no problem. Before, before I wouldn't have even been in that room. I wouldn't have gotten involved. I would have never frozen in surgery. And I would have told him what I thought he should do. I had an edge, sir. I had an edge and I've lost it, and I need it. I need it back. So, if you could just tell me, how you keep yours and how not to be affected, I know I could be a great surgeon. So if you could just give me the answers, I would really appreciate it.

I didn't like teenage girls when I was a teenage girl.

You’re adorable when you’re slow.

You’re just that good Little Grey. There’s just no getting over you.

He hasn’t asked for you or called. I think he’s made a choice.

And I’m drunk. Hiccup, hiccup.

This message was brought to you by the Harper Avery Foundation of America. Donations of the foundation can be made at www.nepotism.

Evil spawn has a brother? Oh my god, you’re so nice. Why can’t you be nice like your brother? Angel spawn.

Who doesn’t know Madonna? I am not a sore loser, and so what if I am? The whole point of games is there is a winner, a first place. You want a second best surgeon operating on you? No, you want the very best. And second best is mediocre. And to settle for mediocrity is self-loathing and sub-standard work ethics.

Science is the one thing we have in common. I’m an intern, you’re not. I’m a slob, you’re not. I say I want to keep our relationship private, and you go and tell the chief of surgery. You ask me to move in with you, and now you’re religious.

It's not like we can kill him twice.

I fell asleep because I had already finished, twice.

It’s bad enough that Meredith is dating a vet. I am not dating a chicken surgeon.

My mother made me go. My date barfed on my dress and then tried to feel me up.

Yeah, but you're all dark and twisty inside.

Burke, I laid naked on top of your last night so why don’t you was in nostalgia about that.

You let a guy you picked up in a bar see you naked and you can’t even give him an enema?

This pity thing, it’s not good. If you want crappy things to stop happening to you then stop accepting crap and demand something more.

I could do hot in my sleep. I look hot in scrubs. I’m a hot person. He’s seen me naked a thousand times.

Don’t touch my ass.

What am I supposed to say? ‘I swear to love and cherish you of every moment of my stupid life.’ That’s not real, that’s not how it works.

If you don’t know the answer. Choose B. It’s always B.

I don’t get picked for surgeries because I slept with my boss and I didn’t get into med school because I have a famous mother.

Well, your mother with the Alzheimer's thing, and the father you don't talk to.

Your mother called me a racist! She thinks I'm a racist stripper!

The whole point behind hanging out with really old guy is that he doesn't talk!

What happened? This morning you were all bright and shiny, asking to be kicked in the face.

Sometimes it’s actually painful to be around you.

[voiceover] As doctors we know everybody's secrets. Their medical histories, sexual histories, confidential information. That is as essential to a surgeon as a 10-blade. And every bit as dangerous. we keep secrets. We have to. But not all secrets can be kept.

[voiceover] In some ways, betrayal is inevitable. When our bodies betray us, surgery is often the key to recovery. When we betray each other, the path to recovery is less clear. We do whatever it takes to rebuild the trust that was lost. And then there are some wounds, some betrayals that are so deep, so profound, that there's no way to repair what was lost. And when that happens. There's nothing left to do but wait.

His mother rivals my mother and that is saying something.

You can buy anything for ninety-nine cents. It’s a chair for ninety-nine cents.

What if it were you? What if you couldn’t be a surgeon anymore? Or you could still be one but not a great one, just average. He could get his surgery somewhere else, but that surgeon might be average.

It's small. It's tiny size. It has cat-type creatures on it. But it is a chair. For ninety-nine cents, you can buy furniture. That is America, man!

I’m coping, so shut up and look at all my crap.

Oh... hi! I'm getting married to Burke! Not that that should be anywhere on your list of thoughts right now, but just in case you slip it in the hall later... you are the one person I wanted to tell.

Thank you for not dying.

I'm coping, okay? I'm coping! So uhh... shut up, and look at all my crap!

The laughing, the drinking, the music. Okay, nobody, I mean, me, needs to hear George's rendition of 'Sexyback' at 3:00 in the morning.

It's like living in a youth hostel.

I have five rules. Memorize them. Rule number one, don't bother sucking up. I already hate you, that's not gonna change.

The dying patient better not be dead when I get there, because not only will you have killed someone, you will have woken me for no good reason. Are we clear? Yes?

Rule number five. When I move, you move...Go!

I get angry when I go without sleep.

I haven’t observed religious holidays since I was old enough to know better.

Even George manages to get some action.

So, when we're on duty, I can have sex with someone else?

Burke wants to have a relationship... Boys are stupid.

What was I supposed to do? Blow off my boyfriend for Thanksgiving? I tried to. He wouldn't blow. He's like something sticky that won't blow off.

Have some fire. Be unstoppable. Be a force of nature. Be better than anybody here and don't give a damn what anybody thinks. There are no teams here. No buddies. You're on your own, be on your own.

You know what, I know a liar when I see one because I’m a liar. Fine, you want me to lie to the patient. I’ll lie.

You can’t date a vet. He’s not even a real doctor.

I need a drink, a man, or a massage. Or a drunken massage by a man.

That was my best supportive girlfriend and you kinda ruined it with medicine.

The last time you called him McDreamy, you were all atwitter with love.

I blame the babies, they make you toxic.

Way to go dipwad, telling your wife you're figuring out how to off her.

Yeah, Burke and I are going to talk about how hot I am over dinner. This date is such a mistake.

God, it doesn't matter how good you are. Or how hard you work. You can do all the research, you can master all the latest techniques, I mean you can be the best. You can be the best surgeon in the world, but your patients are still gonna die. 'Cause the next day, or the next month, or the next year, you know they're just gonna get hit by a car. Or find a mole on their back. There's nothing you can do about it. I don't want you to die.

Are you kidding? That was the best date I've ever been on.

She’s barely back on her feet and you got her calling you McDreamy again. I was just telling the patient the truth. You might want to try it sometime.

George, beer is dripping from your nostril.

The beast? Is that like some sly reference to your penis?

So basically you’re getting paid to look at penises all day.

I should be turning a penis into a vagina. That should be my penis.

Your heart’s, like, in your vagina.

I don’t get what McDreamy or McSteamy sees in her.

And you’re losing McDreamy to his perfect wife, you have a right to be jealous.

Make it stop. Make it stop. Somebody sedate me!

You're my person.

Making sandwiches is not cooking.

You're operating on a turkey. You're making friends with my friends.

There's no stuff to go through. It's a freak show. You can do surgery in here. Oh, he arranged his books using the Dewey decimal system. Mere, I'm scared.

Got freaking keyed before coffee.

Mama took my eyebrows. She took my eyebrows and now I am a Burke.

Your mother wants to have coffee with me. And she thinks I’m a racist too, and a stripper. She thinks I’m a racist stripper.

They're like these 1950's debutantes. One dance and there's a shotgun to your head.

What? It's right there looking at me.

The flag is flying once again.

I scrubbed off my vows. Hello I can’t do this! I don’t have anything to say!

Hey! You have to let me cut. Because I am standing here, eyebrowless, with no dignity left. I am a surgeon, Dr. Bailey. But right now I don’t feel like one, I feel like somebody else. Do you know what that’s like, not to feel like yourself?

This is where I live. My mother decorated it. I don't do laundry, I buy new underwear. And the table, six months of magazines I know I'll never read but I won't throw out. I don't was dishes, vacuum, or put the toilet paper on the holder. I hired a maid once, she ran away crying. The only things in my fridge are water, vodka, and diet soda. And I don't care, but you do. Still think living together is a good idea?

You know what’s wrong with having an 80 hour limit? It protects the weak. It levels the playing field. Which not only sucks. It’s, it’s dangerous.

Love has its limits.

You're a stupid sadist and I want to kill you.

You do not get to kill yourself. You do not get off that easily.

My apartment’s messy. My locker’s messy. But I am not messy.

I think that you're feeling very emotional and when we're feeling emotional sometimes it’s hard to keep a level head and consider all the facts.

Destructive, aggressive, uh hell dog available.

Hell hath no fury for a girl whose non-boyfriend screws a nurse.

Fine, uh, playful, protective puppy needs a home.

Okay I can’t have that grinning puppet head stare at me another second, so just go.

The thing about being dead is that people stop looking for you.

There’s a club. The Dead Dads club and you can’t be in it until you’re in it. You can try to understand, you can sympathize, until you feel that loss. George, I’m really sorry you had to join the club.

No you’re not my boss right now. We’re in an elevator. That’s your specialty right? McDreamy moments in elevators. You know just for a moment, I’m not Dr. Yang and you’re not Dr. Shepard. You’re the guy who screwed up my friend. The guy that drove her to get a dog she can’t keep. The dog she only got because her boyfriend lied to her.

And you’re being honest? That last time you called him Mc Dreamy you were all a-twitter with love.

McDreamy is being McDoushy.

Oh yeah, Bambi got married.

Whatever! Everybody has problems. Now get your ass out of bed and get to work! Now! Move! Move! Move!

You don't need it. I keep that cap in my locker because every morning I look at it and I'm reminded of what I'm here for and what I want to be. A great surgeon. A surgeon who is decisive and who executes, and doesn't need a piece of clothing to give him an edge in a surgery. You don't need it.

Don’t even worry about Bambi. If Burke can forgive me for falling asleep during sex, then George can forgive you for crying.

Oh don’t fall for it. That’s how they do it, huh. With the ‘I love you’s’ and the ‘Move in with me’ and they suck you in, and things are resolved, and the minute that you actually need something, something you totally deserve. Forget it, you know, because it’s not going to happen. They’re gonna pass you over for surgery or they’re gonna duck behind you when someone is shooting.

If I was to pick someone to go psycho and shoot up this place, it’s Izzie.

Dancing makes you brave.

Izzie, the heart is an organ. It pumps and circulates blood. It gets clogged up from time to time. It does not, however, speak. It doesn’t have tiny little lips on it.

Okay seriously, if you are that lonely there are excellent vibrators. I can give you a catalog.

I know you’re having problems here, what with your possible murder charges and your unbelievably stupid idea of stealing a heart, but Burke’s kinda busy right now.

I am not a sore loser. And so what if I am? See the whole point of games is that there is a winner, a first place. Do you want a second best surgeon operating on you? No. You want the very best. And second best is mediocre. And to settle for mediocrity is...is frankly a sign of self loathing and substandard work ethics.

If I murdered someone, she's the person I'd call to help me drag the corpse across the living room floor. She's my person.

Then we either try to marry them or drown ourselves.

Colleagues aren’t friends. They’re competitors.

None of you said anything. Those were all our interns. But I won this. They picked me. If I don’t deserve this solo surgery, then none of us do.

Unlike you, I can separate my personal life from my job. You made it personal.

No cute names. They’re not our pets, they’re our subjects.

When you screw the attending, you get screwed. They hold all the power.

I will sell your body parts for cash.

I cannot straddle a really giant ego right now; I’m already doing the splits.

Stop caring so much about what he thinks. It makes you desperate.

There are no real men left in the world Joe.

Oh, oh, now we’re on again because the mood suits you? ‘Cause I’m the sad little girl with no friend and I tripped your savior complex in to action. Usually I can deal with the hot and cold thing, but not today. Just leave me the hell alone.

Did you know that pretty boy’s grandfather is like God?

Only people who never win awards say that.

Now does Lexopedia want to be badass and help on this?

Oh yes, and all throughout this hospital people are dying while you give me crap about “ASAP.”

Why is everyone so tingly and hurt? I was the one that was left at the altar.

This guy was dead and now he’s undead, so that kinda makes him a zombie. My personal zombie so no, you can’t get in on this. So go be a frog somewhere else.

You cannot move. Do you hear me? This is an operation. Everything is not going to be fine if you move, it will be the opposite of fine. You cannot leave the people you love. They need you. Just remember that you love them.

Carnage trumps rounds, 3. Write that down. Carnage always trumps rounds.

Mama Showdown is not for your entertainment.

If you have time to stare, you have time to get me coffee! Move! Move!

She’s doing McDreamy. She’s doing McDreamy and lying about it. She thinks I’m weak, that I’m fragile That I can’t handle it because of Burke.

I’m not Izzie. I’m not going to lie on the bathroom floor all day. I’m going to lie here, on the counter.

Forget it. Sad is mine. Go find your own pretend emotion.

You slept with her husband. I slept with my boyfriend. It’s not the same thing.

There’s no finesse to breaking bones.

We help more than we hurt.

You are flirting with cardio. I am married to cardio.

Intestines in the hand!

Tell her how I feel? Well, I don’t speak ‘girl.’

It is not difficult sir... it is simple. Burke is not here. He's gone and he's the better for it. He's winning the Harper Avery award and being celebrated all over the world. That is not difficult. He's out there and I'm here where everything is the same. I still live in his apartment, I walk the same halls of this hospital, I wear the same scrubs. It is not difficult. This is where I chose to be. But sir, when his hand was shaking, I performed the surgeries, I kept his secrets, I nursed his pride... you know it and I know it, he knows it. He knows it and yet nowhere in that newspaper article does my name appear. I am the unseen hand to his brilliance. And yet while everything is the same it is very, very different. Now I'm lucky if I get to hold a clamp. Hahn treats me like... I was his hand and now I'm a ghost. That is not difficult... it's unbearable. Everybody is proud of him... but I'm not... I do not wish him well.

She hates you, okay? She’s not going to say it to your face because she’s too polite but she thinks you’re annoying. And you showing up here like a good little girl daddy didn’t abandon is like the worst thing to happen to her in months. And that’s saying a lot coming from Meredith Grey.

Ugh, you make me sick. Have some fire. Be unstoppable. Be a force of nature. Be better than anyone here, and don't give a damn what anyone thinks. There are no teams here, no buddies. You're on your own. Be on your own.

If I was the kind of person who kissed people, I would kiss you.

You’re the Chief’s bitch and you have no power because the power is in the pager.

I’m getting my groove back. I’m getting jiggy with it. I’m getting down with the get down.

No talking unless it’s medical.

And then I was karmically impaled for saying that.

There is no mocking in derm. Only light and warmth.

We are not happy, glowy people.

When you screw the attendings you get screwed. They have all the power.

It’ll be all peace and love and unicorns, Dr. Grey.

Oh, you forgot. Like you forgot to do your notes before rounds? Or like you forgot to pull the drain on my post-op, yeah? Or like you forgot to sign all your dictations so all your charts, my charts, are delinquent? You forgot, because the only thing you can retain in that pea size brain of yours is what time lunch is. Grey here is going to become a surgeon while you dig ditches by the side of the road.

He hasn’t asked about you. Or called. I think he’s made a choice.

Are you petting the pig? Stop petting the pig.

No cute names. They’re not pets, they’re subjects. It’s not our jobs to get all affectionate. It’s our job to keep them alive. So the attending who thinks we’re incapable can choke on his words at the end of the day. So I don’t want to hear Wilbur or Babe. If you want to call them something, call them Sausage or Preshudo.

You made it personal. This right here is you making it personal. You told me to do what I had to do so I chose Alex. He was the most prepared. That’s why I didn’t choose you. Not because we’re fighting. Because unlike you, I can separate my personal life from my job. You made it personal. None of you said anything, those were all our interns. But I won this, they picked me. If I don’t deserve this solo surgery, then none of us do.

Colleagues aren’t friends, they’re competitors.

Oh, now we’re on again because the mood suits you. Because I’m the sad little girl with no friend and I tripped your safe complex adaption. Usually I can deal with the hot and cold thing, but not today.

Before you say anything else, Mr. Good Times, you need to shower. You smell like a distillery.

How about we paged someone who actually knows how to operate instead of some dinosaur who refuses to retire her scalpel and join her friends in Boca?!

Sometimes we fail but that’s not always the case.

It doesn’t matter how good you are, or how hard you work. You can do all the research, you can master all the latest techniques, and you can be the best. You can be the best surgeon in the world but your patients are still gonna die. The next day, the next month, the next year, they’re just gonna get hit by a car or find a mole on their back and there’s nothing you can do about it. I don’t want you to die.

You come here. You pull out my icicle. You make me love you and I don’t want to, I can’t breathe without you.

No, okay, he is not right. Stop caring so much about what he thinks. It makes you seem desperate.

I dreamt once I was falling out a window holding onto the drapes. I woke up pulling Meredith’s hair out.

If you know a way to sugar coat a colostomy bag, I would like to hear it.

What I’ve realized is that Peds is the only area where I can do it all. Cardio, general, ortho, the whole body’s your canvas. And that it’s a small canvas makes it more challenging. I have no idea if you have someone on your service right now, but I’d really like to witness your artistry.
Y: She’s a merger proof. She keeps little kids alive. No one likes a dead kid. Plus their under anesthesia half the time, how bad can they be?

I’m Jewish. I’m allowed.

I can be hardcore into anything you want.

No, I don’t pass, Dr. Sloan. This may be a joke to all of you, but I do my job. Squeezing the scrotum.

I miss Burke. I miss him all day. It’s not the relationship or the sex I miss. Every day that he was here, I got to hold hearts. I got picked not because of some favoritism, but because it was just, it was right and I learned. I learned. And I felt seen.

This is the definition of hardcore. You’re like an astronaut. This is surgery NASA style.

I want to have to pee in a diaper. To be in a surgery so difficult and so long that my only option is to put on a diaper and pee in it.

I hate married, happy you.

I need someone to take me to the next level but he brings me this Desert Storm Barbie who hasn’t seen an OR in like ten years. I mean, if this is what he thinks of my talent then I gotta break up with him.

Take a look around, nothing’s normal.

This is the best Thanksgiving ever. No obnoxious relatives, no stupid traditions, no going around the table and saying what you’re grateful for.

I’m insensitive sometimes but I’m not oblivious, and I don’t want you to be with me, because you feel you owe me something, because you two went through war.

Please don’t cry on my ass. Please don’t cry.

Burke. Burke was um… He took something from me. He took little pieces of me, little pieces over time. So small I didn’t even notice. He wanted me to be something I wasn’t and I made myself into want he wanted. One day I was me, Cristina Yang, and then suddenly I was lying for him and jeopardizing my career and agreeing to be married and wearing a ring and being a bride, until I was standing there in a wedding dress and no eyebrows, I wasn’t Cristina Yang anymore. And even then I would have married him, I would have. I lost myself for a long time, and now that I’m finally me again, I can’t. I love you. I love you more than I love Burke, I love you. And that scares the crap out of me, when you asked me to ignore Teddy’s page, you took a piece of me and I let you. And that will never happen again.

Did you know that Pretty Boy’s grandfather was God?

He’s an entitled brat with no skills except a really good bloodline.

Prizes push us to be better.

What can I say? My heart lies in my scalpel.

You’re adorable when you’re slow.

You’re just that good Little Grey. There’s no getting over you.

He’s Harper Avery weight.

Evil spawn has a brother. Oh my god, he’s so nice. Why can’t you be nice like your brother? Angel spawn.

I am a cardio-therastic whore.

Why? Because you’re dumb as a box of hammers.

You’re still on fatty, fatty two by four. No fair.

If your mom dies, you’ll feel a lot of things. First, you’ll feel like you could of done more to help her but it’s not true, you did everything you could. It won’t feel that way but remember me telling you this, you did everything you could. And it’ll hurt every time you think of her, but over time it will hurt less and less. But eventually you’ll remember her and it’ll only hurt a little.

You’re a super, super sensitive man. Let me tell you what you saw today. I reflectively listened to a patient’s concerns. I spoke to her in a language she could understand. I clearly stated the possible complications and probable outcomes. That’s all you saw today, me kicking patient sensitivity ass. So go be someone else’s dishrag.

Do you think I’m Thatcher? Were you trying to tell me this morning that I’m Thatcher? Owen is Ellis and Teddy is Dr. Webber and somehow I’m Thatcher in this situation.

So, how did he react? Was his world made whole because your womb isn’t empty and dry? Did we weep like a bitch baby?

You can’t be in there. I can’t do this if you in there, staring at me with big ‘Don’t kill McDreamy’ eyes.

I'm not wearing white - its sexist and vaguely racist.

Fifty says she's back in the cuckoo's nest by lunch

I don't have a sourpuss this is just my face.

Well we went through the scariest thing a person can go through and we survived. So now every day's just a gift. And now we're all blessed. Blessed to be here, blessed to be doing what we do best, which is saving lives. Every day. One life at a time. We're healed so that we can continue healing others.

Cross my heart, hope to die.

Some of us don't need to practice.

Don't give up on yourself. Let us help you.

Believe it or not, not everything I do is about competition.

Oh, tiny baby heart time.

Careful when you go in there Mer. Tangle with one Hell's Angel, you tangle with the whole gang.

You're the one who needs to keep his mouth shut, cabbage patch.

If you continue to whine about how you can't decide which groundbreaking medical advancement to put your name on, I'll punch you in the ear.

Meredith has two ground-breaking medical projects and I don't have any.

I will NOT be taking care of children. That's what boarding schools are for.

Sado-masochistic chief resident candidate, maybe.

It is a nightmare — the whole thing — and for all for what? Just to sign up for 2 years of sleep deprivation and feces? I'm so happy we're never going to have to deal with that.

I am so grateful you're not trying to knock me up.

Well, 'cause men leave wadded toothpaste in the sink, and, when you have your own sink, you don't have to look at it. All dried and congealed and filled with their fossilized oral bacteria.

Nobody parented you. This is to be expected.

Oh, screw beautiful. I'm brilliant. If you want to appease me, compliment my brain.

Sex with me, however hot and excellent, could cloud your judgment.

I haven't had sex for like three days and I think it's giving me super powers. Everything is bright and clear. I am solving problems. No wonder you are so organized, you have virgin super powers.

You know, she's the only one who ever gave a rat's ass about you, and now you might have destroyed her career. You should find some skanky intern to love you because next time you're in a burning building, no one is handing you a glass of water.

I think your either born simple or you're not. I want to be the person who gets happy over finding the perfect dress. I want to be simple because no one holds a gun to the head of a simple girl.

Baby steps don't include multiple traumas.

Running a code can be chaotic. Sometimes the best thing you can do is know when to get out of the way.

Wanna get some crack cocaine?

First year med students. Too dumb to find the toilet.

I'm unstoppable and you got defeated by a piece of plastic covered in urine. Buck up.

Med students are like students are like children at the dinner table to be seen and not heard.

Okay, you think peeing is exhausting. Wait 'til you have a muling, poo-covered infant hanging off of your boobs 24-7.